Romance Is Dead

While Camping, This Guy Hooked Up With His Friend. Now? Radio Silence.


It happens all the time — well, in porn films. And on Reddit.

User HKML000 shares a tale of considerable woe; a tawdry anecdote that involves gay sex, a camping trip, and then — because life is hard — a gale of static followed by radio silence.

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The story so far: this self-professed “straight-acting” gay guy is part of a Boy Scouts group that regularly takes weekend camping trips, and he and his pal Cory took several of those jaunts together.

Think long poles, tent flaps, and vain remorse once the campfire sputtered out and died…

Take it away, HKML000:

Cory and I were sharing a tent. Obviously, as guys do, we ended up talking about girls. He was bragging about everything he had already done because he was a year older and I (obviously lying) told him I had done some things too…

Me being a gay guy, [I] got a boner. And then the weirdest but most exhilarating thing happened to me: I’ll save you the gory details, but we did some oral stuff and used our hands a lot. This set-up may seem unnecessary but I’m stating it to show you that he came on to me. I’m sure I gave him no reason to believe that he owed it to me or that I was coming on to him. Anyway we did this for the first night and then one final time in the evening when we were “taking a nap”.

Now this is where I get confused. After we did it for the second time, he just completely changes and shuts down. He acts as if I don’t exist but when he had to take notice of me he treated me like a child…. When It came time to go home we had to car share but the whole journey back he didn’t speak to me, not once, whereas when we were first driving down he had been talking to me the whole time.

Bummer. And it gets bummier.

In the end, this young man stopped going to his Scouts group:

I had had enough of being spoken about behind my back (And by the end I was openly being called “Gay” and “Gayboy” in a derogatory way) and I was afraid that I was slowly falling in love with someone who hated me for something I had thought we both enjoyed.

Now, an entire year has gone by, and judging by the reams of purple prose he’s written on Reddit, he’s clearly not over the emotionally unavailable candy-sadist he once called a friend:

In a way the entire experience has helped me metamorphosize into who I was really supposed to be, but even a year later I still have the doubt in my mind. Why does he now dislike me? We have messaged each other since but when we have they have been fleeting conversations with him refusing to talk about it and pretending as if it never happened. He pretends as if we are fine but I can tell he is still wary of me.

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He’s asking readers what exactly he did in order to earn his ex-friend’s wrath –“Did I do something wrong?” — and he’s wondering if he can do anything to patch things up and restore the relationship.

Readers have been to offer their two cents.

“The problem might be that he feels guilty about what happened,” responds one Misstress of the Obvious, “and rather than addressing the source of that guilt, he has decided to repress it and cut you out because you’re a reminder of what happened.”

“He hates himself,” says another. “This has nothing to do with you and is his lesson to figure out.”

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A third reader posits a different theory: “Experimenting with you has ultimately led him to the conclusion that he’s straight and now he doesn’t know what to think and how to feel about the things you did…”

So — short of waiting another year and then building a fire out of his ex-friend’s property like a good Boy Scout — what should he do?

Sound off in the comments below.