Cher And The Gayest Acceptance Speech Of All Time: “Judy Garland’s Got Nothing On Me”

CherBritain’s Attitude Magazine held its annual awards in London on October 15, and the recipient of this year’s Legend Award was none other than god herself, Cher, who released her 25th studio album, Closer to the Truth, last month.

“I think this is the first one of these awards that I’ve ever accepted,” Cher told the raucous crowd of mostly gay men. “I always get a little bit nervous when someone wants to give you like a lifetime achievement award, because then somehow your lifetime means it’s over and you have to go home and knit or something like that. And I’m just not ready to do that.”

Cher talked about how gay men have been a part of her life since childhood, crediting her stunnnning mother for being way ahead of her time. “I was nine years old,” she explained. “And my mother had these two friends that came over, and the first time I saw them—they were hairdressers, of course—but the first time I saw them, they came cha-chaing into our front door… In the beginning, I actually thought that gay was code for fun.” [Ed. note: gagging]

The Oscar/Emmy/Grammy-winning icon went on to share a little real talk about the gays, whom she referred to as “my friends.”

“Gay men especially, they either love you or they don’t even notice that you’re on the planet,” she said, which elicited a collective squeal from the audience. “I think what you guys like is a strong woman who’s having a breakdown constantly. And that certainly is me. Judy Garland’s got nothing on me.”

Let’s be clear, the only person who could throw shade on Dorothy without alienating the gays is Cher.  Not Babs, not Madonna, not even Liza (who, at this point, is probably like “Judy who?”). Cher can do no wrong, because she’s been shutting shit down for the past 800 years. Everyone SHNAPOUTOFIT! and bow down.