Cole Ryder’s friend emailed us this weekend to say that the porn star did not die of a staph infection, as originally reported. The friend, however, would not reveal any new details, saying the cause of death is not important. When we said the silence indicated that, in fact, the cause could be of note, we were called “fucking assholes,” a charge we can’t deny. Anyway, we’re told a press release with be sent out explaining everything that went down…
Clearing Up…
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Woof
Ok call me insensitive, but he was a porn actor, is there really a need for a “press release”????
Trenton
If the original news was reported incorrectly, a PR is probably in order.
Mark
On behalf of the many friends who were with Cole during his last days, and as one of the two people who held his hands as he passed, please remove the misinformation that he died of a staph infection. He did not.
His family and friends will be issuing a press release in the coming weeks with further details.
In the meantime, please allow him and us a little dignity during the grieving process and cease posting rumors and speculations on his death. He was a beloved human being who made a big impact on everyone he touched. Please do not belittle his life by prurient speculation as to how he died. Please focus instead on how he lived — a man devoted to his family, friends and community.
gay as life
The press is writing about Ryder, so, um, yes a press release is appropriate.
As far as his “friends” being upset about the reporting of a staph infection – all the hand wringing is lovely, but if you really want to clear up how he died, just state what happened instead of waiting “weeks” to release a statement. If you can take the time to post comments here, then surely you can take the time to clarify the details of his death.
Don’t blame others for bad reporting if you have first hand information but you are not willing to correct it.
CHURCHILL-Y
^ Is right all these friends of his popping out on this blog should be able to set the facts correctly instead of pointing fingers. That would put and end to any false rumors.
Jeremy
No offense, I love this blog, but really, he’s dead. Now’s not the time to be running the rumour mill.
seitan-on-a-stick
Is this another AIDS cover-up? Doctors are paid to put any ARC as a primary cause of Death. We should all remove the stigma of the cause of death as we have been in this Epidemic for 3 decades!
It’s what they don’t print!
Mark
I’m opposed to baseless speculation, but why not put an end to it by just posting the cause of Mike’s death? I see no need to wait weeks to issue a press release.
William F. Proctor, II
For clarification, when the coroner first viewed Mike’s body at our house, she believed he died of congestive heart failure. A preliminary tissue study showed Mike suffered from a severe genetic predisposition to arteriosclerosis (a hardening of the blood vessels). This may have lead to a stroke, a heart attack, or an aneurysm. We will not know for six to eight weeks.
Again, intentional misreporting on this blog is astounding. Below is the e-mail string with Andrew including his insensitive responses.
From:
William F. Proctor, II
Subject:
Re: Correction about your Cole Ryder posting.
Date:
August 01, 2008 07:51:18 PM PDT
To:
[email protected]
Cc:
Fuck you, asshole! I just got through asking for a little respect and
understanding that I’ve lost my lover and best friend, that he died in
my arms, and all you care about is how he died!
It wasn’t drugs, it wasn’t AIDS, it wasn’t suicide. The truth is it
was something eminently treatable, but he gave up and died of a broken
heart because he felt people only viewed him as a commodity, and only
valued him for his body. I guess with your reponse, you proved him
right.
It’s a shame you didn’t know the real him. He could have taught you a
lot about gentleness, kidness, selflessness, honor, politeness,
respect and humanity. You clearly have none.
On Aug 1, 2008, at 7:42 PM, [email protected] wrote:
> The secrecy suggests cause does matter
> ——Original Message——
> From: William F. Proctor, II
> To: [email protected]
> > Subject: Re: Correction about your Cole Ryder posting.
> Sent: Aug 1, 2008 10:30 PM
>
>
> Yes I do. However, as I mentioned previously, the family and friends
> will be issuing a press release in the next few weeks.
>
> Again, we ask that the focus be on his life and the contributions he
> made to those around him. Does the cause of death really matter? It
> doesn’t bring him back, it doesn’t lessen our grief, and it doesn’t
> change our love and respect for him.
>
> Thank you for your understanding.
>
>
>
> Will Proctor
>
>
>
> On Aug 1, 2008, at 4:48 PM, [email protected] wrote:
>
>> Will do, William. Do you know the cause of death?
>> ——Original Message——
>> From: Wiliam F. Proctor, II
>> To: [email protected]
>> Subject: Correction about your Cole Ryder posting.
>> Sent: Aug 1, 2008 7:43 PM
>>
>>
>> Dear Sir,
>>
>> On behalf of the many friends who were with Cole during his last
>> days, and as one of the two people who held his hands as he passed,
>> please remove the misinformation that he died of a staph infection.
>> He did not.
>>
>> His family and friends will be issuing a press release in the coming
>> weeks with further details.
>>
>> In the meantime, please allow him and us a little dignity during the
>> grieving process and cease posting rumors and speculations on his
>> death. He was a beloved human being who made a big impact on
>> everyone he touched. Please do not belittle his life by prurient
>> speculation as to how he died. Please focus instead on how he lived
>> — a man devoted to his family, friends and community.
>>
>> Thank you. If you have further information, please feel free to
>> contact me either by reply e-mail or via cell at xxx.xxx.xxxx.
>>
>> Very truly yours,
>> Will Proctor
>>
>>
William F. Proctor, II
To “gay as life,” “CHURCHILL-Y,” “seitan-on-a-stick” and “Mark.” Thanks for being jerks and causing additional grief and anguish.
(1) I was not his “friend” (what the F* it with the quotes?) — I was a real friend and was with him 24/7 for the past several weeks, so don’t insult my relationship with him by cheapening it with quotes. What do you know of friendship? You have not treated him with any dignity and respect …
(2) How dare you blame me for someone else spreading lies simply because I had not shared the cause of death! If a journalist does not know the cause of death, they are ethically obligated to report that they do not know. Publishing misinformation based on rumors with wanton disregard to it’s truth is called “libel,” violates the journalism code of ethics and is actionable at law. As Mike’s attorney, this is your notice to cease and desist.
(3) We aren’t waiting “weeks” to issue a press release, but excuse us for being a bit busy with funeral arrangements, memorial arrangements, settling his estate and grieving. Satisfying the public’s morbid and prurient interest in how he died is not first on our list. If you didn’t care how he lived or who he was as a person (not the sex object, Cole Ryder), then why do you care so much how he died? Get a life!
gay as life
Clearly, the death of a loved one can have a large impact on one’s judgment and sensitivity. But I do not see anything insensitive about Andrew’s responses.
Mark F.
Will,
Thank you for the clarification.
I am truly sorry about the loss of your friend. If a “broken heart” contributed to Mike’s death, he couldn’t have been more wrong that he didn’t have any true friends.
No 4
In response to seitan-on-a-stick; Probaly is AIDS…look at his body. That or drugs…stigma? Let’s see GAY porn star DIES of AIDS…hypothetical autopsy results…DRUGS found in system.
What does everyone see…GAY DEATH AIDS DRUGS. Hence a cover up. I mean come on, it’s news like this that people who dislike gay people live for.
Mark F.
Will,
I apologize for my previous comment. I’m just a naturally curious person. There was no intent to be disrespectful or to hurt you. I would very much have liked to have met Mike. My thoughts are with you in this difficult time.
Truce?
Jeremy
I’m sorry to hear that you had to lose the one you loved, William. I wish I could write something that would make you feel better, but unfortunately, only you knew exactly what he meant to you, and now that he’s gone, only you can understand what losing him is like. Anyways, stay strong. You loved him, and I’m sure he loved you just as much. And to other gossip bloggers out there, get some manners, why don’t you? Just because someone has sex on film, doesn’t make them an object. He was a human being who had sex on screen. If you can’t tell the difference between porn and reality, you obviously shouldn’t be watching it.
JPinWeHo
FYI, for those commenters who were threatened with a libel lawsuit in No. 10, I wouldn’t be too worried. Libel suits brought by public figures like Cole (or his estate) are much harder to assert than your everyday standard libel. Plus, Cole’s estate would have had to suffer monetary damages due to your comments – that is doubtful. Also, it’s doubtful that anyone’s comments above were libel – libel is falsely stating a fact. “Speculating” that something “might” be true is not libel – it’s an opinion. Bottom line, don’t be cowed into apologizing due to a threatened lawsuit.
TBSJR
bottom line is a man is dead. He was not just a porn star but a living breathing human. I think many times we view porn stars as just pieces of meat who fuel are desires. Then we can’t wait to talk bad about them when they hit bottom or in this case pass at a young age. RIP
GodAlmighty
Sounds like Mr. Proctor IIVVXXOO needs a proctologist. What a pompous lying blowhard. Cole Ryder had obvious fat wasting in his thighs and other areas. “Genetic predisposition to atherosclerosis”? Yeah, called HAART. Why are people still lying about this? It’s almost like it’s become more of a stigma to have AIDS now than ever. If he was diabetic, had markedly elevated LDL’s (cholesterol) or something else, wouldn’t you just say it?
Oh, and Mr. Blowhard, cease and desist your crap and whining about all the insensitivity. This is a blog. People write crap. Get over it.
GodAlmighty
Also, who is “talking bad” about him? From the interview I saw through a link on this blog he seemed like a really sweet guy (& a hunk!). I’d never even heard of him before. People are just curious about why he died. It’s natural to have curiosity. All this insincere “you don’t CAAAAARRREEEE!” is irritating. Movie stars (of all types) are public personalities and, duh, of course people are curious. Haven’t we all heard more than we ever wanted to about how Marilyn Monroe died??
By the way, Mr. Blowhard XXIIOO, if you’re so busy, then get to it and stop reading blogs.
Roman
“…he felt people only viewed him as a commodity, and only valued him for his body.”
Ummm…excuse me…but wasn’t he a PORN ACTOR?
krysfox
i would like to know about funeral/ memorial services for Mike… no bs or drama, i just want to give my last respects to a man who was and IS a dear friend of mine. Can ANYONE on here help with that?
[email protected]
Thanks, Krys
Chilly
Gotta agree with “Woof”. A press release? he wasnt “famous” anymore than any other prostitute is. The truth is that his friends and family loved him like all of ours do and they are the ones who will carry the pain now. But sadly his life wasn’t a positive example due to his own choices.
Mark
Im sorry Chilly but can I ask you to come step off your soap box for just a minute and explain to everyone how all of your decisions are such a positive example? If there were not a demand for porn there would be no porn actors.
I agree everyone is responsible for their own choices dont get me wrong, but really?
I like to think I lead my life as positively as I could but I would never claim to be a positive role model nor would I judge someone for their actions, especially after their death.
win now
I have admire your unselfishness in taking the time to make this web site.