A new study from University College London has found that Millennials are shaping up to be one the most chaste generations ever.
The study tracked more than 16,000 people born between 1989 and 1990 since they were 14 years old. Researchers found that Millennials are waiting longer–like, way longer–than previous generations to have sex, with one-in-eight Millennials report still being virgins at age 26.
When factoring in participants who refused or declined to answer the question regarding virginity, the number of Millennials not having sex by 26 jumps to one-in-six.
This comes off the hells of another study also conducted by University College London that found that found millennials have sex an average of 4.9 times a month for men and 4.8 times for women, compared to 6.2 and 6.3 respectively one decade before.
So what’s the reason for all this sexlessness anyway?
Related: What counts as losing your virginity when you’re gay?
Well, some researchers believe it could have to do with over-exposure to sex and porn, which is giving them complexes about sex.
Psychoanalytic psychotherapist Susanna Abse of the Balint Consultancy told the Sunday Times, “Millennials have been brought up in a culture of hypersexuality which has bred a fear of intimacy.”
She continues, “The fear for young men is of being humiliated that they can’t live up to that, plus the fear of exposure in your Facebook group.”
Others think it could have to do with the myth that Millennials, in general, have fragile egos.
“Millennials have been so coddled by their parents and teachers that they are now unable to accept others’ opinions and realities,” psychologist Lori Gottlieb wrote in The Atlantic. “Which makes it hard when, in a relationship, your reality is that you will go to the farmer’s market and make a healthy salad together, and your partner’s reality is Starcraft.”
Interestingly, researchers at University College London also found that, while Millennials are less likely to have sexual partners, they are more likely to maintain their personal independence later into adulthood than previous generations.
Related: Entitled millennials have totally ruined hookup culture, says millennial
Roldan856
I call BS on this part ““Millennials have been so coddled by their parents and teachers that they are now unable to accept others’ opinions and realities,” psychologist Lori Gottlieb wrote in The Atlantic.”
Really? Since when have children NOT be coddled by their parents? If they’re not screwing its because A. The ease of access to porn thanks to the internet and B. Maybe understand the value of a genuine bona fide relationship rather than just random hookups.
thisisnotreal
I agree and disagree with you. I like to think that some younger generations in the gay community have just gotten tired of the over abundance of sex via Grindr or whatever the flavor of the month is and are now starting to search for something more fulfilling in the long term.
But as for her quote about kids being coddled and not being able to accept other people’s realites I couldn’t agree more if I tried. I was born in 85 and back then it wasn’t a thing for kids to get “triggered” like they do everytime someone near them so much as sneezes. Back then we were taught to respect people’s differing opinions and outlooks and value that variety, but now so many younger generations take it as a personal attack when someone else doesn’t support their causes or agree with their interests and outlooks. It’s gotten to the point where so many things are becoming censored for fear of hurting some sensitive persons feelings. Teach your kids about rejection and disappointment and the word no cuz life is full of it.
Vince
@Roldan856. Hmm.. that’s interesting. Something I never thought about. Growing up with such easy access to porn would definitely change a person’s behavior. You can even get it on your phone nowadays.
Get yourself off and you go from cave man to looking for something more meaningful. Works for me.
GlobeTrotter
Well, I’ve had an experience that makes me agree with this article 100%
I’m in my forties and last year got involved with a mentoring program for young adults. One of the young guys, about 24 years old, badly needed a temporary place to stay so I offered the usage of my guestroom (no snickering, my intentions were entirely chaste!)
I knew he had a girlfriend so I told him up front she was only allowed once or twice a week to sleep over. To cut a long story short, after he moved out a few months later, I went to delete his profile off my pc when my curiosity got the best of me and I started browsing through his internet an pic collection. Yes, that was very bad of me, but I was very curious.
Boy, was I disappointed! Apart from one or two sexy music videos and a few flirty chat logs from some girls in his class, there was NOTHING, ZILCH!!! No porn, no porn sites, absolutely NOTHING!
I started wondering if he had some type of sexual dysfunction, for at his age I had a hidden stash of porn pics, several scanned nude pics from gay mags, plus video clips, etc. Let’s not even talk about the porn sites I used to visit!
All I found on his internet browser were links to a few funny titty pictures (looked like something he would have shared with his friends for laughs), one or two semi-nude pics of his girlfriend (I’ve seen her wear less walking around the house) and like I said, flirtatious chats with some of the girls in his class, more bordering on the notes we used to pass around in high school.
I actually got really worried, since a young man at his age is supposed to have one just one thing in mind, and given the easy access to porn and nudity, it baffled my mind that he didn’t at least visit a few porn sites.
So I wouldn’t be too quick to dismiss this study. We were FAR MORE into sex when I was a teenager than the kids I see around nowadays, but then again I grew up in the age of Madonna and MTV and sneaking around after your parents when the bed to watch HBO and Cinemax.
I once joked around with him, pretending how shocked I would react if I ever found his porn stash. He just looked at me like he had no idea what I was talking about. I then said, “you know, your stash of porn and dirty magazines – every young guy has one”. I got the impression that he had no idea what I was talking about. And he’s a completely normal, well-adjusted 23-24 year old guy!
JK 1984
@GlobeTrotter, kids these days don’t need a porn stash, not when you have more porn than you can ever watch at a click of a button and incognito/private browsing so that people checking your search history (yes that was very bad of you hahaha) won’t find the freaky stuff you are into.
dwes09
“Really? Since when have children NOT be coddled by their parents?”
Like in every previous generation.
Every kid i knew was out and about on their own when they were 6 or 7, playing with no adults around in the street for hours on end. I was taking the subway myself into Manhattan by the time i was 11. I went to sleep away camp starting when I was 7. And my parents were similarly allowed autonomy as kids. By contrast millennials seemingly never had the opportunity to get away on their own and were supervised and scheduled until they went off to college.
I remember distinctly at 6 or so being told by my mother she would not have me tied to her apron strings, get out of the house and play with my friends. By the same toke we were carefully taught to be wary of strangers and to be streetwise. So no, children have not always been coddled by their parents. And i was taught by my folks about sex when i was 10, and they made it very clear that there was great personal responsibility involved. When at 15 a friend’s mother called the parents to say her son had a condom in his wallet and she was determined to find out who gave it to him, my mother’s response was “if my son is having sex I hope to God he is carrying condoms, and where do you get off going through your son’s wallet!”
masterwill7
@Globetrotter The days of secret porn stashes are over.. My older brother had one, but I already used the internet (I’m 34).. Also there is nothing to worry about, kids nowadays are very good at hiding their porn history(If they even use a PC, they use incognito mode).. I NEVER watch porn on a PC, only my mobile phone (Tumblr), sometimes I stream it to the Apple TV.. I didn’t even think this through, but no trace for anyone to find.. If I’m already like this at 34, youth isn’t using a pc for porn for sure.. (And YES, you are very bad for searching through his files! 😀
Kev57
Got to disagree with you, Roldan. Millennials are coddled by parents. They are staying with mommy and daddy well into their 20s, or later. In my day, you might be allowed to stay at home until graduation (high school or college). After that, you were out and on your own!
Vince
Funny on my survey on Grindr/scruff its the exact opposite. Hmm. Maybe the researchers need to get out of the lab.
masterwill7
Grindr /Scruff are apps guys use to search for sex, this research is about kids who aren’t looking for it. Maybe you need to read a little better. 😉
Vince
Just about every gay Millennial is on at least Grindr. Ass.
Karlis
An interesting story, but Queerty really needs to hire a proofreader. “With one in eight Millennials report…” as opposed to reporting, and “on the hells,” not heels of another study. Grammar is our friend!
Vince
Ha. I have to say this is the first avator pic I’ve seen with a family portrait. Nice.
Heywood Jablowme
They spent so much on the new moderator, & now you want them to hire a proofreader too? 🙂
chris33133
I thought that “on the hells of” was a Freudian slip.
rod
Interesting story, but when those hormones start dictating what you want to do, it’s hard to say no thanks! Just saying . . . .
tham
So Millennials are shaping up to be virgins who live with their mothers.
Yeah, that sounds about right.
masterwill7
True! But the study talks about 12,5% or 16,66%..! The rest is just fucking and sucking.. hehe
batesmotel
I find this hard to believe. The amount of Millenials hitting me up with things like, horny?, looking? Is mind boggling.
CastleSF
It’s not mind boggling, considering the sleazy web sites you probably have logged on to. You get exactly what you are looking for.
dwes09
ASSuming much?
Larry Topping
This is nothing new. It’s true of every generation. Every one’s afraid of losing virginity, until after they do it.
Heywood Jablowme
Come on – this is a study of 16,000 BRITISH Millennials. No wonder they’re not having sex!
JK 1984
What I find funny is the survey said 1 in 8 are still virgins (or something like that) and this is proof millenials are CV coddled and scared of sex?
Yet to me that means that 7 of 8 millenials ARE having sex and not having those issues.
There are always going to be and always has been the mid 20s virgins, whether due to religion, lack of confidence or any number of other reasons.
chris33133
And 50 years ago, “spoiled baby boomers” were too quick to lose their virginities; though we called it “balling”. Choose your judgmental headline.
Raymundo
From my experience what aids in the lack of sex is a mixture of good sex education, the fact that there is more to life than sex and that most people are too business. Most the people I know are more focused of exams and classes than sex.
dwes09
He seemingly has appointed himself the arbiter of modern homosexual ethics while making it painfully obvious he has very little life experience.
masterwill7
I don’t think he meant it like that, think he wants to say: If you look on Grindr or Romeo, Scruff etc it doesn’t really represent all guys, and these apps are usually used for hookups.. 🙂 (In my translation of CastleSF’s comment).
Celtic
Am I missing “Something”? This survey of 16,000 covers only one year, born between 1989 – 1990? I also question how one has sex 4.3 times of 6.2 times. When does sex occur in 0.2 or 0.3 times? Suppositional orgasms, perhaps. As to male millennials being coddled, many of them have been mommied too much. Do they lack the benefit of good male, masculine role models. Seriously.
eireapparent
Not the ones I’ve banged. At first, I was put off by this millennial daddy fetish, but came to quickly realize there was an upside.
Heywood Jablowme
Oh yeah!
DCguy
Baby Boomers are a huge group and they are in power, no shock that ridiculous studies are trying to attack the generation that’s going to replace them and knock them out of power.
Ari Gold
Not only was this study conducted at a London college, but it literally only surveyed people within a TWO YEAR RANGE. How is that “millennials?”
Aromaeus
Maybe it’s because we’re working harder and longer hours for less pay while also being saddled with tons of debt so we just don’t have the time to go cruising like baby boomers who are the cause of so much of the economic turmoil we face 🙂