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Former Bachelor star Colton Underwood says he’s received lots of support from some of his fellow Christians about his coming-out journey. However, he’s also received criticism from others for “living a lie”.
As he details in his recent Netflix series, Coming Out Colton, reconciling his faith and his sexuality has been a challenge for him. On Instagram this week, he shared some of the messages he had received [swipe the IG image above to see them].
“For those of you who saw my show you know I’m still on my faith journey. While I’ve had a ton of support from the Christan community I’ve also heard ‘well it’s got a lot better over the years’ and while that might be true I can’t help but to think if these messages still get sent to me…what is being said to closeted men and women who want to remain in their faith?
“These messages are not okay. They do not represent Christians. They do not represent our God.”
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Related: Colton Underwood says he wouldn’t shower with NFL teammates in case he got turned on
The first message he shared said, “Men are supposed to want women and women are supposed to want men. Please Colton. Don’t get stuck in this lie. Look at our bodies. The reproduction system. Regardless though Jesus loves you. I don’t want to be ‘that Christian. I have gay friends. It’s hard. I don’t want to come across the wrong way. Maybe I’m wrong. But there is something so special about a man and a woman and all the things Jesus said about marriage.”
Another says, “You are not gay, quit with the lies… go home and be with your family. Quit trying to be something you are not. God is still on the Throne and He is still watching you! Don’t forsake him. The world has you living richly in sin … get out of the spotlight and go back home.”
Another reaches out to say, “Hi Colton, I care about you because you opened up. Please don’t listen to people. Please listen to Jesus. In 1 Corinthians 6:9 it says men who practice homosexuality will not inherit the kingdom of God. Please don’t tell other people it’s OK to practice homosexuality.”
Underwood’s posting has prompted over 6,000 comments. Actor Johnny Sibilly said, “Wow these people really cracked the code!!” Chef and restaurateur Jeremy Fall said, “Some people shouldn’t have the right to speak, they are oxygen thieves.”
ESPN news presenter Ashley Brewer summed up the sentiment of many of those to respond, saying, “God loves you and I love you!”
Underwood came out as gay in an interview with Good Morning America in April. Earlier this month, he confirmed that he was in a relationship with political strategist Jordan C. Brown.
Related: Colton Underwood confirms he’s got a boyfriend and is “in love”
This week, Underwood shared a photo of himself and Brown and wished his followers a merry Christmas.
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Mister P
OMG those Christians are delusional.
Erik
Their biggest delusion is that they are following Christ.
cuteguy
There is nothing wrong with believing in a higher power. Once you separate worshipping God from cults aka religions, you will be at peace
mastik8
Is Queerty getting a kick back of some sort for consistently pushing this non-story.
Donston
These types of messages, and worse, are fairly common for out queers in same-sex relationships who are public figures. I hate to say it, but my first thought is he’s using a handful of messages for attention and sympathy. When you’re a public figure, you want to promote being Christian, promote being gay and in a same-sex relationship, and you have the recent messy and narcissistic history you have, do you really expect everyone to love and support you and to only get messages kissing your ass? Online bullying is a thing and should be talked about. While some folks do need tougher skin. It’s pretty delusional to tell very religious and homophobic/anti-gay love and commitment people to “play nice” and expect them to do so. Colton still doesn’t seem to be living in the real world and still seems caught up in creating narrative and image.
deann
Wow, Colton is experiancing homophobia and you imply that it is his fault for being a “celebrity”, that it is expected and should have tougher skin and finally you accuse him of playing a “narrative” when he did absolutely nothing (it’s others who are sending him hate.) Stop giving him sh*t for getting bullied , I know that a lot of people don’t like him, but for christs’ sake give him a break.
Chrisk
“It’s pretty delusional to tell very religious and homophobic/anti-gay love and commitment people to “play nice” and expect them to do so.”
Yeah, where was this statement that he sent them that you speak of? These are just shitty hypocrites who hide behind their “faith” to hate anyone that they don’t approve of. They’ll always go out of their way to attack people.
Also, you may have missed this statement.. “I’ve had a ton of support from the Christan community”
Donston
I said specifically “very religious and homophobic/anti-gay” aka people who fit into both categories. I’m not shading all Christians.
I’m also not blaming him for the messages. But yes, I am saying that he needs tougher skin. I’d say that to anyone online complaining about a few massages, especially if they’re public figures. This is gonna happen if you want to go on about being Christian but also be gay presenting and in a same-sex relationship. You’re gonna get your fair share of preachy/“you need to be with a woman” messages. When they’re abundant and unrelenting and cause mental strife then you can talk about being bullied. And if that’s the worse he’s gotten outside of all his supposed support then he ain’t getting it too bad. He has some rather unrealistic expectations. Also, as I’ve said many times, I understand everyone has different struggles and different journeys. And I sympathize with dealing with closet pressures, hetero expectations, religious guilt, male/masculine insecurities, mental health struggles, trying to understand/come to terms with where you are in the gender, sexual, affection, romantic, emotional investment, relationship, commitment spectrum. But he has indulged so much manipulation and narrative building and is now using his gayness for sympathy and funds and to build a new persona. It does make you take a grain of salt with everything he puts forward. None of this means that I think those messages are okay.
UlfRaynor
Where was this same advice when you accused gay men of causing harm to trans people because of the bigotry of their “genital preferences?”
Armchair therapist, heed your own drivel.
Donston
UlfRaynor, sweetie, where did I say anything like that? I tend to stay out of trans people’s business. I especially don’t indulge much of that discussion on this messy ass site. While as long as you’re not being an a-hole or a leech or an abuser or generally insecure and “problematic”, I don’t judge the dimensions of people’s sexuality, preferences, lifestyle, love, where someone is in the gender, sexual, romantic, emotion, commitment spectrum. I even recall saying a couple of times that if trans people fit into your spectrum then you can’t really be conventionally “straight” or “gay”. But also, I don’t really care much about identity. Therefore, I couldn’t care less if trans people fit somewhere in your sexuality/spectrum or not or someone’s genital preferences.
Maybe you confused me with another Donston. Or maybe you’re so obsessed with hating on someone that you’re attributing shit to me I never posted. Never mind that what you’re talking about has nothing to do with the topic at hand.
UlfRaynor
Well bless your heart dahlin’, I can understand how you might get lost in the quagmire that is the litany of labels you toss around and nice try at the deflection, it was adorable.
However, you did make such an assertion and I responded by reminding you that the word sex in hetero, homo and bisexual alludes to the sex of ones attraction and that sex is determinate in any organism by their reproductive organs.
So when someone states they are gay (slang for male homosexual) they are literally stating they are sexual attracted to male genitalia and that a “genital preference” wasn’t whether it was a vagina or a penis, but the various physical attributes male genitalia may have, like length, girth, cut or uncut etc.
I was also unaware that debate and discussion was completely limited to the topic you want to discuss, not that I would listen since unlike you, I’m capable of holding more than one thought in my head at any given time.
Donston
It is “limited” when you bring up stuff I never said. I never had such an opinion and never said such a thing. I’ve always pushed that everyone has their own sexuality, their own things they will and won’t indulge, their own dimensions, their own preferences, their our experiences or non experiences with fluidity, their own struggles, their own psychology and motivations, their own spot when it comes to the gender, sexual, affection, romantic, emotional investment, relationship comfort, commitment spectrum. I probably said that everyone is so varied and the views on sexuality, identity and gender is incredibly varied and driven by a lot of different things. Therefore, it’s difficult to pin down exactly what “gay”, “straight”, “bi” etc. are supposed to mean to each individual person. That’s not the same as claiming that anyone needs to be open to having sex and/or relationships with whoever. I’ve always been opposed to trying to force people to be “open-minded” when it comes to the life they want to live. In fact, I’ve spent a lot of time arguing against the “everyone needs to be ‘open-minded’ when it comes to their life” views. And I’ve spent a lot of posts here defending homosexuality, homo-romanticism/commitments, living the way you want to live and calling out non homo pressures, internalized phobias, self-misandry, and the shaming of homo passions and love and commitment.
Don’t confuse my views and words with what you might see from randoms on Twitter. If you can’t comprehend what I’m saying or you skip over big parts of my posts then just ignore me. But don’t pin shit on me I never posted and try to put me in a group with certain people because you don’t like me.
Donston
I’m really tired of a handful of people here adding stuff to my posts or actively not comprehending what I’m saying so I can more easily fit into their narrative. I’ve been inherently homosexual for most of my life, am married to someone of my sex, don’t want to legitimately be with anyone outside of my sex, and have been living a homo lifestyle for three years. What I look like telling people that they need to be “open-minded” and need to have sex and/or relationships with certain people in order to validate them? Even the thought of saying such a thing I find cringe-worthy. And when I see someone saying something like that I find it cringe-y, problematic and often homophobic. While if you’ve kept up with my posts you’d know that I’ve actively argued against such views many times. Once again, don’t attribute shit to me I never said or try to connect me with a certain types of “queers”.
Claiming that we need to put less weight on identity, that people will always use identities as they wish and that everyone has their own makeup, struggles, insecurities, motivations and journeys is not “people should have relations and relationships with who I want them to”. What I write is what is write. Don’t add shit that ain’t there.
cuteguy
This ex cult queen is only looking for attention to cover up for the jerk he truly is. He may be handsome on the outside but he’s extremely unattractive on the inside
BLAKENOW
Hey nasty Troll, have you even seen his show? He’s a man who mad mistakes like all of us have.. Hes on a good path now….stop trolling and take a long look in th mirror if you can stand it. you are a huge part of the problem in this “whatever eye rolling hypocritical community”
cuteguy
@FakeNow
We all know you’re a GQP troll on here. This bastard stalked an innocent woman and then pulled a Kevin Spacey and “came out”. Then he’s talking about getting erections in the shower with other athletes, basically diminishing all the gains we have made over the years for acceptance. Go back to Faux News and take the reality show Kevin Spacey with you. You do not belong here
ryeguypdx
Why not share some of the supportive Christian messages he got, if that’s what he’s after? Why not show us how it’s done? Instead, it’s “many beautiful things happened, and a few terrible ones. Here are only the terrible ones,” which only causes further discord and strife, as if we needed any more. It’s better to light a candle than to yell at the dark.
Fahd
Why don´t gay people who want to practice Christianity become Episcopalians or join other denominations that welcome gay people as they are? Why try to resolve one´s identity with a dogma that focuses on rejecting and changing one´s identity?
Just maybe the only way you´ll be able to sit comfortably with your family at Christmas in church is if they make the leap to the gay-affirming denomination with you. I´d say, otherwise forget it. But Jesus is Jesus, no?
Mack
I laugh when people say “God said in _____ Book 1 _____” God didn’t say anything. The Bible is a bunch of stories written by man with all of of man’s prejudices and bigotry and is stated as “God stated”. Just like today you hear Graham stating that Trump is chosen by “God”. If he is, he sure as hell has one sense of humor. If you believe in religion that’s your right but sure as hell don’t try to preach to me about it This last October I was at Disney Springs waiting for my Sister in Law to do some shopping. I was sitting on a bench and couple guys came over and started asking me if I had been saved. I looked at them and said “Saved by who? Your imaginary sky thing? That’s all bullshit, it’s just a way to control you and obviously it worked.” They turned around and walked away.
Jaquelope
If you don’t believe, I guess that’s fine. We all were given free choice, but I think Trump was chosen by God, not to be the “next Messiah” but someone to show what can be the wrong way to behave, and as stated in Biblical Prophecy as one of Satan’s minions who would be granted power for a short time, in the working of His plan for Mankind. It is also written that no one can come to power without God allowing it, and if they lead others astray, then they are held fully responsible, and will be cast into the Lake of Fire.
We may not understand God’s plan, but be assured that He does, indeed, have a plan.
Another thing that is often said/asked by these uber-religious types is, “Have you found Jesus?”, which I respond to by answering, “I never lost Him! Did you?”
IWantAFullBeard
Make it go away. Please!
BigJohnSF
I remain skeptical that he is gay, but am willing to let him prove it to me. Actually, that’s a tacky joke. Watching his show (which I highly recommend) my gaydar fired right off the bat. And the show has several appearances from Metropolitan Community Church representatives, who are part of his ongoing faith journey. I don’t know why anyone would want to live their lives as publicly as he has, but he strikes me as honest and authentic. Of course bitter queens hate him.
BLAKENOW
living publicly? most people these days crave it, what rock have you been living under? It’s called social media.
Kangol2
“Bitter queens” don’t hate him, but you’re clearly obsessed with him and a bit clueless. That man craves public attention and drama or he’d never have appeared on one of those Bachelor/Bachelorette shows!
cuteguy
@BigJohnSTFU
I remain skeptical that you’re human. I believe you’re nothing but a closeted Faux News troll
masteradrian031
And the to know that those same “Christians” are following a guy who lived together with twelve(12) other guys, who had left their own wifes for him……… The guy referred to as Jesus by all those “Christians” obviously opnely declared his love to these twelve guys, sleeping with them, kissing them, sharing with them………
Who knows, the “christians” denouncing in the 21st century all homosexual people are in fact idolating an openly gay man……..
Would it not be great when one dat the facts about this Jesus are exposed?
What would all these gullable “christians” say and do then? Deny the truth ofcourse, and still abusing the gay’s around them!
FairylighT
Mack, My sister would have loved to have seen that. I completely agree with you. I have said that so often that same thing.
Kangol2
Isn’t 1 Corinthians the apostle Paul interpreting Christ’s life and message and not Jesus Christ Himself? Does Christ mention homosexuality in any of the four Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke and John)? Anyone a Biblical scholar, reader or Christian themselves and know this? Because from what I recall, Christ doesn’t.
That said, your sexual orientation is an intrinsic part of who you are. You can change religions, but you cannot just swap out your sexual orientation, though the ex-gay movement tries to scam people into thinking they can, often with very damaging psychological results.
UlfRaynor
Actually he does, Jesus acknowledges that we were born that way.
While he didn’t use the word gay or homosexual, since there was no word for homosexual in either Hebrew, Latin or the Aramaic (the language Jesus spoke)
He did however use the terminology of the time period that was common in all three languages and cultures, he referred to and acknowledged they existed by using the terminology: “born eunuchs.”
The definition of a born eunuch is all you need to make this determination, in Arab, Hebrew and Roman culture, a born eunuch was defined as a man born without a desire for women. Fairly apt description considering the patriarchal nature of all three groups.
This is especially telling, that its from these verses where Jesus discusses it, that the Catholics determined that Priest should be celibate, since Jesus stated that the thing that would be most pleasing to God, above all others, would be for men to remain unknown (virginal) to woman while attesting that some men were born eunuchs or made to be eunuchs by men.
tigg3rtam
Colton ….who? We dedicate so much time discussing affairs that every gay person goes through and we make them relevant for doing nothing.
fur_hunter
When evangelical fundamentalists see a guy who is around 31, lives with another guy, isn’t married, sees him kiss another man, or proclaims that he loves another man…… they wave that book in the air, yelling out he’s a homosexual, an abomination and is going to Hell…………. WELL…………. Think about this!……… Jesus was over 30, not married, lived and slept with 12 men, kissed Judas and proclaimed love for Peter. SO….. is it possible…….. JESUS WAS GAY!????….. Yeah…… Think about that.
Iona Lexiss
Religion and “God” are mutually exclusive. Religion is for the weakest links who are ripe for brainwashing because they don’t trust their own thoughts. Religious followers have checked-out on personal responsibility, integrity, and character–someone else (who they don’t know) has to tell them how to think and all mistakes are because ‘God must have meant it to be.’ F#cking weak-minded idiots.
James Hart
Colton Underwood is a fraud.