COMMENTS: Is Cynthia Nixon The Enemy—Or Is Dan Savage? Is Unsafe Sex A Crime?

Time for the Queerty Week in Comments, with five of the most compelling, thought-provoking or just downright bitchy comments that came directly from you, the readers!


“Well, saying you regret your choice of words, is a half step back, but not necessarily an apology. Still, isn’t it funny how conservatives always pretend that they are the tough ones, the kick ass ones, the ones who can defend America go to war etc… and yet all we ever hear from them is: ‘Boo-hoo, you were a meanie and hurt my feelings, say you’re sorry!”
defends our ally in the Old Line State, in MD First Lady Apologizes For Calling Anti-Equality Lawmakers “Cowards.” Durn


“Cynthia Nixon is the one who referred to her partner as a ‘short man with boobs.’ She has a history of making peculiar comments. Soon she will be competing with Anne Heche claiming she was abducted by aliens and spent the summer on Vulcan.”—Apparently Christopher di Spirito thinks Cynthia Nixon’s “It’s a choice” comment puts her in some interesting company, in  Cynthia Nixon: “I’ve Been Straight And I’ve Been Gay, And Gay Is Better.”


“I was just banned from the Transgender reddit for defending Dan Savage. The guy is cissexist and a little politically incorrect at times, but he’s definitely not transphobic, and DEFINITELY not the enemy. Fucking rabid trans people piss me off. Apparently, one of the other gripes they have is that he makes fun of fat people, but we can’t have that or the Fat Awareness Movement gets pissed. I’m beginning to see why we’re not doing as well as gay folks when it comes to rights if these are the kinds of people leading the trans rights movement.”
is tired of getting dumped on by other trans folk, in Opinion: Stop Glitter-Bombing Dan Savage. He’s Not The Enemy


“He is not a person—he is a monster! Any person that infects another human with HIV has NO SOUL!”
—Tastey Goodies
tells us how he really feels, in HIV+ Pro Wrestler Gets 32 Years Behind Bars For Unprotected Sex

“I didn’t know you could auto-tune the National Anthem.”
—It looks like
Ted B won’t be watching the halftime show, in Ten Ways Madonna Is Bringing Gay To The Super Bowl


Photos: J MacPherson, Madonnafan_Duesseldorf, GLAAD

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  • Interesting

    “OLBERMANN: Is there something you think specifically about gays
    serving in the military that these people don‘t like? Or is it, as you‘re
    suggesting, this is like a timeline in which wherever they encounter the
    gay, these bizarre straight people, presumably straight people—who knows
    have to overreact just because this is the latest battlefield, no pun intended?

    SAVAGE: First, that‘s a really great point. Who knows whose lifting these people‘s luggage, these folks who are so paranoid—

    SAVAGE: I‘d like to see what‘s going on in their heads. I think they‘re projecting, some of them. Whenever they‘re on the verge of losing, they trot out these desperate nightmare scenarios. And they really on the verge of losing the last two final issues when it comes to gay rights, which is service in the military and marriage.”

    Cite of transcript: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/37397099/


    “In The Life,” probably one of the view substantive gay shows out there, discussing what you won’t see on gay main stream blogs like Queerty or from Dan Savage


    LGBT discussion of homeless youth again by “In the Life”


    40 percent of homeless kid are LGBT, and 1 in 4 LGBT are kicked out.

    This is the source of frustration of activists with people like Dan Savage. His myopia that comes with privilege (that only his issues are LGBT issues) is the problem.

  • Sceth

    What is it with this fetishization of enemies? Cynthia Nixon and Dan Savage report their perceptions as they are. The latter is hella insightful into human mechanics, and (this would be all-redeeming, if there was anything for which he had to be redeemed, which I don’t see) funny. Nixon and Savage not enemies. The hypersensitivity of the moderators on the LGBT and Tranny-Friendly Reddits would burn them both at the stake, simply because those moderators are myopic. Le Queer continues to be pit against the same thing that has always attacked it : paleoculture. And sensitivity is part of the paleoculture.

  • Sceth

    ^ I meant, “Nixon and Savage are not our enemies.”

  • jonah h.

    Unsafe sex cannot be a crime because that would mean that the police (government) will be invading our bedrooms. Knowingly giving someone a disease–thats a crime

  • ptboat

    Neither of them are enemies. They are people with opinions, like everyone else.

  • Pickles

    If we’re going to criminalize people with HIV (because transmitting a virus is an illegal act) then we need to criminalize folks with Herpes, Chlamydia, Syphilis, The Flu, etc.

    If you don’t want to contract a sexually transmitted disease, YOU are responsible for protecting yourself.

    Unless your are raped, there is no way you can blame someone else for our own lack of self preservation.

    People lie about sex. Always have always will. People like about their own infection status. Many people are ignorant about their own infection status.

    The point is, no matter how much you love someone, you can’t be sure they aren’t infected. THEY might not even know.

    Use a condom, use dental dams, use finger cots if it makes sense. Just don’t be dumb about sex.

    You are not going to contract an STI from someone else (regardless of the infected person’s motivation or intent) if you protect yourself and don’t rely upon others to do it for you.

  • R.A.

    “…they [are] really on the verge of losing the last two final issues when it comes to gay rights, which is service in the military and marriage.”

    That’s it? That’s the big TRANSPHOBIC statement we keep hearing about ad nauseum?

    Well, unless the fundie scumbags pull something new out of their butts, he’s absolutely right.

    He says, “when it comes to GAY rights.”

    TRANSGENDER rights (like dressing as one’s gender rather than one’s sex, birth certificates and other identification papers, restroom and dressing room usage, sports qualifications, etc.) are part of LGBT rights, but they are certainly NOT “gay rights.”

    YOU should be glitter bombed.

  • Drew

    Dan Savage is still highly transphobic, biphobic, misogynistic, and racist. He’s nothing but a media whore and fame whore who speaks for himself only. Most GLBT people don’t like him at all. Savage is just as bad as Santorum and Rev. Phelps except that he pretends to give a shit about GLBT youth and GLBT people all while spouting off his hate towards black people in the state of CA, bisexuals, women, and trans people.

  • Interesting

    @R.A.: I am presented with a problem in responding to you. Your question suggests you are not capable of logic, but that’s the tool with which I communicate. Here goes: No, my giving one example does not mean there is only one example no more than if I just say the number 1 means there is only the number 1 in terms of the existence of other numbers. So, no, I am presenting a non-trans example. there are others. That’s the whole point. Every time examples are given some queen like you runs out to say “oh no, that doesn’t prove a thing.” “neither does that one.” “Nor that one.” “nor anything really because I am going to practice the fine art of the fallacy called denial.”

  • Interesting

    @R.A.: oh, and despite your ignorance, if you had seen the linked post you would see (a) I am not sure what value glitter bombing serves other than getting out the word with Dan’s myopic views and (b) I don’t think the struggle for gay rights is either/or (either we support marriage equality as the “only right” as Dan says or we support LGBT youth in poverty in terms of rights as other activists say. They are both wrong. We need to support both because they are really the same underlying issues. Someone once asked why isn’t there a push for a universal gay civil rights bill rather than a piecemeal approach. At the time, I did not understand why they said that. Now I do. The atomized approach invites some queens to try to get there’s while ignoring the rest. Divide and conquer is wrong whether its Dan or the few trans who take his tactics in reverse.

  • erasure25

    @Drew: so I guess you now speak for the lgbt community. Excuse me but who put the tiara on your head? Speak for yourself only. OR provide some evidence that “most” gay people don’t like Savage. You don’t speak for me and don’t you dare to ever presume that you do.

  • Dan_is_slime

    Dan is not a good face for the movement. However the media has decided he is. While we argue over the entire matter he cashes anouther check, extracted from the combined missery of every LGBT person who has been abussed by society or family. The man makes his money off of our collective missery. If society didn’t heap hell after hell on us there would be no pay check in the gay movement for Dan. If overnight we suddenly gained our rights and every bigot said sorry, the man wouldn’t have a job.

    He is slime.

  • christopher di spirito

    @Drew: You scream, “Savage is just as bad as Santorum and Rev. Phelps.” Are you insane or just misinformed? Rick “Frothy” Santorum and Rev. Fred Phelps are two of the most unabashed homophobes in contemporary American society. To try and equivocate Dan Savage with them borders on the pathological.

  • ChrisC

    @erasure25: Did ‘Drew’ say ALL? No, he said “Most”. In what part of that statement did it give your mind the impression that he thought he was talking for all of us?

    I personally cannot stand that cunt Dan Savage.

  • RT

    All I hear is a very very divisive and ultimately detrimental rhetoric. I got very upset that some arguments have arisen within LGBT community about the use of the word, “tranny” and. Now there is this talk about who’s cis-sexist and what now. ALL DIVISIVE TALKS. I want to hear from a leader who stands in front of ALL OF US and START talking about more real solutions, more real plans, more fundraising parties, more marches and more results.

    Clinton had it right. Gay rights is a civil rights homework of our generation. Much like the African American civil rights was to our parents. But still, we have to remember that they are all CIVIL RIGHTS ISSUE. One should never be a gay activist, but a champion for all civil rights. This is not about letting us marry. It’s about Americans living up to the lives our Founding Fathers set standard for.

  • RT

    Ok, clearly I need to write posts while not tired. I know there are lots of typos and errors, but you get the point.

  • ChattyKathy

    Gender identity and sexual orientation are two different things. As an advocate for gay rights, Dan Savage may not be the best, but he speaks from his point of view as a gay man. If the trans community doesn’t agree with his rhetoric, then they should find a representative from their community to take action for their causes on the same level as Savage. No single person speaks for an entire community, especially one as diverse as the LGBT community. We all may have similar or shared experiences, but if lumping all these aspects of orientation and identities into one community is going to cause this much divisiveness and infighting, how are we ever going to achieve our shared goal of equality, if we can’t even reach it within ourselves? We need to stop scouring our communities for enemies, and start creating our heroes.

  • Aiden

    @ChattyKathy: Why is it divisive to point out when someone is wrong? Being gay doesn’t give Savage a pass on the racist and transphobic statements he’s made.

  • Max the Communist

    Is Cynthia Nixon the enemy? I have no idea. But I do know Queerty has given her a LOT of attention, even pre-“gay-is-choice” pronouncements. An enemy of your own making, gay community?

  • R.A.


    “you are not capable of logic”
    “some queen like you”
    “despite your ignorance”

    My, that’s a lot of name calling.

    Sorry, but it’s not going to distract everyone from the fact that the Terrible Olberman Quote you’ve been touting for weeks as evidence of Savage’s transphobia has turned out to be absolute garbage.

    Do you really expect Queerty bloggers to follow links from your tedious gay-bashing diatribes in some futile hope that they might lead to something worthwhile?

    We are not your obviously over-indulgent parents.

    But go ahead, call me more names. That is your proven stock in trade – post nonsense. lose arguments, and call names.

  • Isaac C

    @R.A.: Just so you’re aware: if you’re white, “Interesting” will automatically dislike you. But if you’re white AND you disagree with him (and most here do), then he will hate you, call you names, and in the future accuse you of stalking him if you appear in the same Queerty post as he does on whatever topic it is. That is the state of his schizo mind. As you can see, his ridiculous posts highlight his fragile mental state.

  • ChattyKathy

    @Aiden: I keep missing the part where I wrote “pointing out the wrongs of others is divisive” or “Dan Savage can be a racist transphobe because he’s gay”. My comments were pretty concise. Gender Identity and Sexual Orientation are two different things, so homophobia exists in the trans community, and transphobia exists in the gay community; the division exists because they are two entirely different things lumped into one community. I think glitter-bombing an LGBT activist is deconstructive for both communities (and in general a passe and ineffective means of “protest”) and makes the LGBT community look divided and ridiculous. Where was the trans activist outreach and reason? And as for Dan Savage being racist, I have yet to see some definitive evidence of that…


    I am a gay identified gender fluid FEMALE top.

  • David

    you’ll notice that Savage’s fanbois will always claims “oh no no no! He’s great he’s not racist, transphobic, isn’t poz phobic, or biphobic at all!!!” and they’ll deny how he actually is a documented racist, biphobe, poz phobe, and transphobic person.

    Dan Savage is no friend of LGBT people, HIV+ people, bisexuals, trans people, GLBT people who are not white and rich, and women and men who have been raped.

    Dan does not speak for all gay men or all GLBT people, and he’s not a leader at all even if this media whore wishes he did. He’s a self centered embarassment. If you think that Dan Savage actually cares about GLBT youth and GLBT adults, or anyone but himself you haven’t been paying attention.

    He completely supported the 2nd Iraq war, and then pulled a stunt with crocodile tears and self promotion for an MTV reality TV show with his failure of “It gets better”.

    Dan is not an expert in issues that effect GLBT people, and he’s not an expert in anything except being a conceited asshole and drama queen. Then again he has a degree in drama and nothing else. He’s no better than Perez Hilton. I remember reading a column where he foolishly claimed that if you’re addicted to alcohol or illegal drugs that you can simply just safely stop them and that you don’t need treatment or help at all. He’s also 1,000% vanilla and does not have any fetishes or actually practice BDSM so why does he give out advice about these subjects which he knows nothing about? I also have read where he said how if you’re into various kinks, consensual BDSM, or if you have fetishes to keep them to yourself and not tell anyone.

    Then you have people who excuse his biphobia, transphobia, Pozphobia, and racism which is disgusting no matter if you are Monosexual, or Trans.

    I’m for GLBT equality so I am not going to sit idle and ignore him when Dan Savage is frequently being transphobic, biphobic, or when he’s pozphobic, and then you have some gay men who make up excuses for his bigotry and give him a pass instead of calling him out on it.

    I do know many gay men who actually do not like Dan Savage, don’t think of him as any sort of leader, and are just as sick and tired of him and his bullying as most people here in Seattle, the pacific northwest, and the west coast are.

    Chatty Kathy-Actually Trans people, bisexuals, and African Americans have went to Savage and told him how he’s biphobic, transphobic, and racist and he refuses to even apologize and give actual factual information, and actually correct himself and actually admit for once that he’s wrong.

    I agree #13 Dan_is_slime, it’s clear he only did his whole “It gets better” project not to actually help GLBT teens but to get money, media attention as he’s a media whore, and for a reality TV show on MTV.


    @Pickles: Yes, it is an individual’s sole resposibility for practicing safe sex. I always do. However, if one is in a very long term serious relatioship and that person contracts HIV from that partner, what then? Who’s at fault here? Just curious.

  • Clay

    to think that dan savage could generate such a comment post is actually pretty pitiful. but then to come across HIV STIGMA just goes to show how far we have not come since the eighties.

    what i see: the inability to care for those in your community. Instead, it’s the same ol’ bullshit of making yourselves feel better and more privileged in yet another minority group that is somehow convinced that breaking into a mainstream, CAPITALISTIC, evil hetero-normative society is going to magically make things better – HA! Savage is an A-Gay and is upper middle class and lives in the suburbs with a house and kids and just wants to emulate a Heterosexual lifestyle and thinks that all bisexual and gay men should do this or that we all somehow want to like him. Savage is a media whore with Peter Pan syndrome who just loves attention and can’t get enough of it even if it’s negative attention.

    I find it hypocritical that gay men are claiming that most bisexuals and trans people are somehow victimey or want to celebrate victimhood, when most gay men love to play the blame game and pretend that everything that doesn’t support gay men 1,000% of the time all the time is homophobic. Yet if a Straight person or even another gay man or LBT person who can think for themselves says anything criticizing their sacred cows or anything against the “Community” they’re branded as homophobic.

    I’m not sure why so many Savage/It gets better queens on this blog are now claiming and denying that Dan Savage is poz phobic? He clearly is and if you’ve read his “advice” column or listened
    to his podcasts one can easily see how he has major issues with people who are HIV+ and that he is poz phobic. Or how they’re now revising history and claiming that Savage has never been
    bigoted towards bisexuals, trans people, and African Americans.

    Try doing the resarch on these topics for yourself and you will see how Savage is very bigoted.

    It really is just as bad as the shit we get from Heterosexist society and Rev. Phelps but it’s from another GLBT person so it’s 10,000X more hypocritical and worse when it’s from someone on the inside like this.

    fuck this shit. IT DOES NOT GET BETTER!
    you’ll spend your days feeding the wallets of major corporations. allowing them to sell you a version of gay culture that is more concerned with KILLING YOU and this thing you call “individuality.”

    then instead of actually doing anything about being metaphorically “fucked in the ass” by nearly 99% of americans (because queer/GLBT people still fuck queer/GLBT people over in extreme ways) you’ll turn to some MONEY-HUNGRY ICON like Dan Savage, and repost false, generic information and claim it as your own.

    and don’t forget the pride celebrations and nightly outings, which take you on a spiral into ALCOHOLISM, meth addiction, bareback sex, and recklessness. where a quarter of you end up hiv-positive because nobody has learned how to talk to one another or give a shit about knowing their status or using condoms either in the heat of the moment or as part of having safer sex. and instead of blaming yourselves, you’ll blame others, until you hopefully realize how fucked up the “community” is, and start living a more productive and meaningful life.

    but fuck it, it’s pride and we all know what that is about, right?
    going out, buying shit, getting wasted, buying more shit, getting more wasted, angry, annoyed, horny, stupid, redundant and ugly.

    well, not so much. it’s about stonewall. it’s about resistance. it’s about a memory and celebrating a time when queers were brave enough to stand up and fight against the system in hopes of thriving and forming their own unique culture. stonewall was a riot! not another dreadful, self-loathing party in the gentrified Castro district while watching your “It gets better” video and pretending that you’re actually doing something and actually helping GLBT youth when you’re just giving them the stock quote that EVERY KID-even straight kids-get when school isn’t going so well or when they’re being bullied.

    Someone like Dan Savage who is a primadonna media whore that does not like bisexuals, people with HIV/AIDS, or Trans people is the last person we need representing gay men and GLBT Americans in the media. Yeah Dan, “It gets better” for you! Then again he did start the IGB project just for self promotion, since he can’t resist jumping on any bandwagon while pretending to give a shit and getting your money and attention, and to get a reality TV show on MTV.

    Savage is a tool, media whore, jumps on any bandwaggon-Started his whole “It gets better” project not to actually help GLBT youth but to self promote he and his husband and get an MTV reality TV show with crocodile tears claiming that he’s for GLBT rights when in reality he hates HIV+ people, bisexuals, and trans people and his “advice” column writings and podcasts on these subjects show his hate.

    Then again he did start the It gets better project not to actually help GLBT teens/youth (all while trashing bisexuals like he is still doing now) but he started It gets better just for self promotion to get a reality TV show on MTV, and because he’s a media whore who can’t resist jumping on any bandwagon or saying or doing anything as long as it gets him any sort of attention or media/press coverage.

    Puhlease! Transphobic, biphobic, woman hating racist that has exploited LGBTs for his own pocketbook calling someone else a scumbag grifter? Hypocrisy, thy name is Miss Dan Savage.

    Protecting Dan Savage is a mistake, his records speak for themselves and taint any advocates that attempt to defend his abhorrent behavior and bigotry.

  • Mark

    Until Dan stops the martyr and professional victim routine about how he is so picked on by the bi and trans communities and how he has never been wrong on any issue, has never been biphobic, transphobic, or racist and people need to just accept his words as infallible, I won’t accept him as an activist at all. I’m sorry. He is a shock writer and a humorist and if he can’t be more responsible, then he should leave it at that. Because I do really worry about the impact he has on bisexual and trans youth, as well as gay and lesbian youth.

    Thankfully a lot of LGBT youth and LGBT adults see Dan as the snake oil seller, media whore, and hypocrite that he is and know fully well that he’s very biphobic, transphobic, and racist and nothing more than a conceited asshole and not any sort of expert on GLBT issues or human sexuality at all.

  • Rob

    It gets better is just a bullshit PR campaign, nothing more. Telling kids to put up with bullying until they leave school is not constructive advice. It’s cruel. School boards, school administrators, teachers, etc., need to have zero tolerance policy for bullying. It’s not uncommon for teachers to bully unpopular kids themselves. That’s where the changes need to be made. But that requires action, and it requires standing up to conservatives who fight anti-bullying campaigns tooth and nail (often claiming that bullying gay people is a christian right). The reason “It Gets Better” caught on with politicians and celebrities is because it’s great PR and it requires absolutely NOTHING from them in the way of real action.

    It’s cruelty to tell a kid to tolerate bullying. And to whom is this campaign even directed? The fat GLBT kids that Savage makes fun of himself? It’s a campaign aimed at good looking white boys with great bodies and upper middle class families. Yes, THEY will do better once they start hitting the gay bars. But for most average looking kids from working class families, they will find a gay/GLBT community that’s often very much like High School, with cliques and teasing and rejection. GLBT kids need to get support from society, and the kids that need that most are the kids that Savage himself would mock and demonize; kids of color, working class and poor kids, fat kids, kids with acne, and kids who are otherwise marginalized in society AND in our community.

    Even when you look at the videos on YouTube, you see politicians who’ve come out against marriage equality, sports teams that would never accept a gay person in their ranks, and celebrities who just want some good press. The GLBT kids who participate are often great looking white boys, who you know will be accepted in the gay community, and are already leading charmed lives. It’s a campaign for the people Savage likes…sexy white male teenagers with athletic bodies who will be greeted with open arms. Yes Savage’s obsession with teenagers is creepy.

    I’ll take the campaign seriously when Savage speaks out on behalf of marginalized LGBT kids, and criticizes the gay community for its racism, biphobia, transphobia, and other prejudices. But he’s the biggest bigot and bully of the bunch, and that’s been proven from his many years as a “columnist.” I often couldn’t believe how conservative, prejudiced, and intolerant he was in those columns.

  • Chet

    To know Dan Savage is to hate him.

    I’ve actually met Dan and worked with him. He’s one of the MOST self centered and people I’ve ever met and he only pretends to be nice to people just so he can get what he wants from them.

    He’s also a bully. See the column where he called out some guy who supposedly left a nasty note for a waitress, and he gave the guy’s personal information out and told people to harass him. People did and it turns out Dan had the wrong guy. The guy who was harassed and his wife just wanted an apology from Savage and they never got one.

    @Chatty Kathy-Umm how about how Savage completely went off on a racist bitch fit like the queen he is when prop 8 passed in California and he completely blamed this all on every single black adult in the state of California? That’s racist and it’s completely wrong! I was deeply offended and angry.

    I also have read his column where he plays on the racist idea that black men have large penises, or he’ll discuss the idea that sex with a person that’s black or a race other than white is somehow something that’s a novelty.

  • Stuffed Animal

    The information on Dan Savage’s problematic statements (past and present) is out there for anyone intelligent enough to Google his name along with “racism” or “biphobia” or “transphobia”. Educate yourself, and I strongly advise that you do it before the Pied Piper of Slog leads you off the edge of a cliff along with the rest of his mesmerized groupies! That’s where Dan-O is headed for sure, and when he finally takes his fall, it won’t be pretty. ;)

  • R.A.


    First you condemn Savage as “A-Gay and is upper middle class and lives in the suburbs with a house and kids and just wants to emulate a Heterosexual lifestyle “

    But then you condemn gays living single in cities with “pride celebrations and nightly outings, which take you on a spiral into ALCOHOLISM, meth addiction, bareback sex, and recklessness. where a quarter of you end up hiv-positive.”

    Is there any way a gay person can live his life that meets your approval, and, if so, what is it and who do you know that lives that lifestyle?

  • Alexa

    So much time wasted hating on people in our community who say stupid/ignorant things, or that we don’t agree with. It would be so much more useful and productive to spend that time fighting the real enemy and just ignoring the people who are actually on our side. And it’s not just the LGBT community this happens in, it happens everywhere. Infighting is always counterproductive.

  • Mike in Asheville

    @Drew: You are soooooooo right!

    I just hate the way Savage goes around the country telling everyone that I and ALL other gays molest and rape children, that we fuck our dogs and horses, that a second Mom is worse than a convicted murderer on death row, that gays deserve HIV/AIDS for engaging in sex, that we should be quarantined and removed from the US (presumably sent to some other country or set up camps).

    Further, I HATE HATE HATE the way Savage has taken the It Get Better campaign that bullies good Christian students from properly bullying gay/lesbian kids for their sins, HATE the way Savage writes to his readers that God is punishing the US and world with hurricanes and storms because 2 American gays suck eachothers’ cocks.

    Yes, Savage is exactly like Santorum and Phelps. Drew, you are a fucking idiot!

  • Will

    Trans-activist can rant and rave about Dan Savage all they want. All they are really doing at this post is forcing the schism even further away and pushing people away from supporting them. Not because of Savage per sea but because they are loose cannons with o leadership who feel it nesessary to slam Savage and then oft handedly compare him to the a major part of the gay population thus insulting us all.

    Also thier lack of pirorities are astounding. Here they are tashing Savage for MONTHS, getting upset about the word “tranny” and going ballistic over a crappy TV show that has two straight men in drag passing as “women” that has absolutly nothing to do or trandgenderism while anti-gay politicians are hate groups are demonizing them and they aren’t fighting back against them the real enemy.

    The biggest problem with the transgender movement is that they have no leadership and no sense of priorities.

    If they want to do something useful, how about desending on Washington and pushing for ENDA and makeing a big stink about it especially since trans-inclusion is what has been holding it back.

  • Marie

    No it’s not slander that Dan Savage is Transphobic. He’s also highly biphobic too and if you want to excuse his bigotry, or agree with it, that just makes you a bigot as well. As for Dan Savage he’s a media whore and not any sort of expert on human sexuality or gender at all. IMO Savage is just as bad as Rev. Fred Phelps and the other Conservative people who hate GLBT people however at least they’re not total hypocrites like Savage is.

    1) Column: Bad Tranny.

    Dan Savage responds to a single parent who recently found out their ex partner is a transwoman. His use of the word tranny is only the tip of the iceberg.

    * The tranny activists are going to jump down my throat for this, but… it seems to me that your ex could’ve put off the sex change until after his son was out of high school.
    * Perhaps I’m a transphobic bigot, but I honestly think waiting a measly 36 months to cut your dick is a sacrifice any father should be willing to make for his 15-year-old son. Call me old-fashioned.
    * Unfortunately, your ex wasn’t willing to make that sacrifice (selfish tranny!), or it never occurred to him to make that sacrifice (stupid tranny!).
    * I hope that in the long run your son eventually accepts his dad/mom/whatever and forgives his dad/ mom/whatever for being imperfect
    * When your son is an adult, he’ll hopefully be able to forgive his dad/mom/whatever for his selfish decision to run off and have a sex-change operation …

    2) Column: Deep Love.

    Dan Savage responds to a man who had sex with a transwoman prostitute.

    * “…going down on a shemale escort shores up your heterosexual bona fides. Gay guys don’t frequent and/or fellate shemale escorts (on purpose or by accident); getting with shemales is an entirely straight-male pursuit.”
    * Of course you aren’t totally straight—try thinking of yourself as something more than straight, not less—but you’re close enough that you can round yourself down to straight with a clear conscience. (Offer void the day you start blowing hemale escorts.)

    3) Transgendered Washington State Attorney General Rob McKenna Betrays His Community

    Dan Savage falsely labels Washington State Attorney Rob McKenna as a transgender man as a “joke”. No evidence exists of Rob McKenna being transgender.

    * It’s staggering that Rob McKenna, a female-to-male transsexual, is making it harder for other FTMs (and MTFs) to access the life savng sex-reassignment surgery that allowed Rob to become the man he is today. Rob had the resources to finance his own sex-reassigment surgery—presumably—but that doesn’t excuse Rob’s cruel disregard for his low-income transgendered brothers and sisters or his making common cause with anti-trans bigots in states like Virginia and Mississippi.

    At the bottom of the page Dan Savage writes

    * This is a joke, obviously. Rob McKenna is not transgender. Follow the link for more.

    A joke? Really? After getting called out for this insulting bullshit Savage writes this in a later article about a trans student:

    (Oh, and folks who want me to apologize for this: Okay, I will—after we raise at least 2K for Juin and his family. Otherwise, meh, I’ll just keep hating on trans people like the raging anti-trans beegoat that I am.)


    Okay. I think that is all the research I am willing to do for now. I can only wade through so much bullshit in a day. I might add to this later if I find more examples of Savage’s transphobia.

    Since so many of us keep writing about what a piece of shit Dan Savage is, I felt like bringing in some of his “lovely” quotes would be nice. Words cannot describe how much I hate that man. Quite frankly, I hate him more than Fred Phelps — at least Fred acknowledges that he hates us.

  • Aiden

    @ChattyKathy: Did I say he was racist, or did I say he made racist statements?

  • Aiden

    @Will: How about not talking about them as if they are all one person. If this was all it took for someone to turn away from trans rights then they were never really allies.

  • R.A.


    Actually no one has ever suggested turning away from trans rights – and you know it.

    That does not mean we will succumb to trans-feminist bullying, turn on drag queens, applaud the slander of gay men who generally do us proud, or become self-hating queens speaking gibberish about cisgendered privilege.

    That seems to be the goal of trans-feminists who post here. You can be their boy toy if you choose, but I am not taking any more abuse from this rude, obnoxious and lunatic lot.

    They can all screw themselves with whatever artificial device they have near at hand.

    Enough is enough.

  • Aiden

    @R.A.:You must’ve completely passed by the comment I responded to because he did. You seem a wee bit defensive about something that wasn’t directed towards you. I wonder why………….

  • R.A.


    I know perfectly well it wasn’t directed at me.

    My post makes plain the game you are playing – accusing anyone of being AGAINST TRANS RIGHTS when they do simply not subscribe to tiresome trans-feminist cult’s ideology and bullying.

    But now you ARE directing it at me, so I will direct the penultimate sentence of my last post to you, too.

  • Aiden

    @R.A.: I see you like to ignore things. I said and I quote “. If this was all it took for someone to turn away from trans rights then they were never really allies”. Notice I said “If” and “turn away”. I never accused him of being against anything. SMH

  • Interesting

    @Aiden: This is really just about bigotry. Whenever someone is labeling an entire group based on the action of one, that means they are just waiting for an excuse. You saw the same kinds of bullshit statements from straight ‘allies” after Prop8 passed in which they said they were “for gay rights” so long as gays did not do things like march for it or seem angry about it, because if they were, they they were would withhold their support. There’s a list I always reference- its called Derailing for Dummies. One of the things it lists is the “you must all be perfect or else I am not going to support human rights” argument. Its used again and again by bigots of all stripes.

  • R.A.


    So what is the purpose of that sentence about turning away from trans rights?

    Will is actually complaining that the bloggers who come here to attack gay men and waste their time demonizing Dan Savage ought to be actually doing something positive in regard to getting their rights by fighting the real enemy.

    So he is clearly FOR trans rights.

    Your sentence is there to imply he might not be – even though his own words are absolute evidence to the contrary.

  • Storm

    There’s a certain wry amusement in watching the energy so many gays expend feeding on each other, especially on any gay person that dares to step out in front and try to lead on, well, anything. Today, let’s savage Dan Savage. What fun! I’m just old enough to remember when large elements of the community savaged Cleve Jones for siphoning time, money and attention for his “stoopid” AIDS Quilt Project. Time, money and attention that, of course, the piranhas all insisted should be spent on, you know, treatment and the stuff -they- thought was important. Cleve Jones, Barney Frank, Dan Savage, Dan Choi, Joe Salmonese — chew them all up, and do it with gusto. There’s a reason that the only gay “heroes” are the dead ones.

  • Aiden

    @R.A.: His words aren’t evidence of anything.

    “pushing people away from supporting them”

    He’s clearly saying that people can be pushed away from supporting a whole minority because of a few people. His (and your) whole comment was full of generalizations that would’ve pissed him (you,and me) off had they been directed towards gays.

  • Shannon1981

    @TASTEY GOODIES: I am the same, though I identify genderqueer an female bodied. I think we are the only two on this board who are female bodied. Queerty, take notice! There are girl queers, too.

  • R.A.

    Well, that’s true. All movements require strategy and need to win people over rather than alienate them.

    That said, from your last post, I see I did misinterpret your reference. Please allow me to retract posts 38 – 43 and accept my apology.

  • Drew

    @Storm-Dan Savage, Joe Salmonese, Barney Frank, and Dan Choi are not even on the same level of any of the old LGBT activists who actually are of importance and who did things.

  • Max

    Storm-I’d like to thank Cleve Jones for allowing me to take a shit last time I went to DC pride. That’s all he’s ever been good for, that and being a hustler when he was younger.

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