What is there to say about someone releasing an orgasm on another person’s face? Besides that it’s freaking awesome (when done with consent), and that a gay man will probably be the first to admit it. Guilty!
The act of “facials” might be labeled degrading in the mainstream, but these are the same folks who used to consider oral sex taboo. Ask any of your parents; someone has to start the trends.
It’s dubbed the “money shot” in porn for a reason, so maybe it’s about time society stops feigning disgust. There’s actually evidence that suggests people who enjoy giving or receiving “facials” have higher self-esteem. So if someone says your skin is glowing with confidence, you can go ahead and point them to the nearest human-spa that is Grindr.
Related: 21 top tweets about ‘top privilege’
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Dr. Megan Maas revealed on Dr. Justin Lehmiller’s “Sex and Psychology” podcast that a study found men who performed “facials” had higher sexual esteem (regardless of sexuality), and women who received “facials’ had higher sexual esteem. (But we can assume gay men like getting them, too, cuz feminism!)
Dr. Justin Lehmiller tells Queerty that he hypothesizes that being sexually self-confident makes you more likely to explore or eroticize activities typically considered degrading because you can do so without it affecting your self-worth. In other words, you’re confident enough to put yourself in a position of vulnerability.
Actor Chris Salvatore knows all too well what it’s like to find empowerment in going against the labels of a boring status quo; even Hollywood can be conservative. “Since starting my OnlyFans almost two years ago, I have found a new sense of myself and my self-worth,” he says. “So often, sexual acts like facials are seen as demoralizing or pornographic when I have discovered that they can have a whole different meaning once you rid yourself of the sexual shame we, as queer people, are constantly told to feel. When I have the pleasure of giving or receiving a facial, I personally feel a great sense of intimacy. This feeling of surrendering to one another is not only a physical turn-on but an emotional one as well.”
The hetero community often portrays people who engage in frowned-upon sex acts as partners you can’t take home to Mom. But Dr. Lehmiller adds that it’s also possible that engaging in sexual activities that require more vulnerability increases intimacy (who says romance is dead!). So if you’re abstaining, you might find the answer to why you haven’t found the love of your life on your clean face.
“I love receiving facials for a few reasons. First, you get to see the expression on your partner’s face while he orgasms,” says Zachary Zane, author of Boyslut: A Memoir and Manifesto, “I love seeing my partner writhe in pleasure, and you don’t get to see that if he cums in you while in doggy style or countless other positions.”
Although ejaculation and orgasm aren’t the end-all-be-all of sex, Zane feels like it’s a reward. He thinks you can’t help but feel a sense of accomplishment when someone shoots on your face.
Sex columnist and author Alexander Cheves says he’s not a fan of facials but loves fisting. “It’s real. It’s beautiful. I don’t know how the general public views fisting other than as something dangerous and extreme. And they’re not wrong: fisting can be dangerous and extreme, depending on how you fist. Fisting can be degrading, but it can also be tender, romantic, playful, and quite gentle.”
Related: Straight man receives oral sex from another guy, enjoys it, wonders if he’s now gay
I wonder if a lifetime of being labeled wrong has encouraged gay men to find the ‘right’ in sex before anybody else. My ex-boyfriends might have plenty of complaints about me but never a lack of imagination in the bedroom.
But you don’t need to be public sex beacons of the queer community to talk about facials without blushing. So I went where I always go when I have hard-hitting journalism questions and texted my besties: “Do you like when men ejaculate on your face?”
“Love it! It’s my favorite place for them to leave it,” replied Kris, a gay fashion stylist.
“I hate it,” replied Nora, a bisexual resident doctor.
“No because then I gotta deal w/ it. Do u?” replied Sergei, a gay music producer.
“Mouth,” replied Frederick, a gay fashion designer.
“No, not particularly. But occasionally is fun time,” replied Teralyn, a straight model.
I appreciated not only their authenticity and knowledge of their sexual satisfaction but that not one person asked me why. Seriously, it’s delightful. This is the kind of world we should all get to live in, where there is no judgment or shame. Everything sex encompasses was meant to be indulged in, celebrated, and then talked about with your friends.
People who are sexually liberated and open-minded appear already to have a healthy relationship with themselves and positive views. High self-esteem is less about whether you like facials and more about not letting society dictate your happiness or pleasure. Enjoy what you like.
Participating in facials might not guarantee you’ll be the most confident person in a room, but finding joy in acts given a negative association means that you create your own rules. And isn’t that kind of individuality on the agenda of queerness? That, and as a trisexual Samantha would say, always being willing to try anything once. Gold star gays not included.
mz.sam
Getting facials is a no-brainer than spending hard=earned money going to an esthetician.
bachy
Private “humiliations” can be fun if you’re generally treated “high-status” in public.
LumpyPillows
Too much woke thinking. If you’re having sex with someone I hope you really aren’t doing it to be politically correct.
Den
Huh?
What exactly do you find either “woke” (the meaning of which is obviously unknown to you) or politically correct about the statement above?
LumpyPillows
Go reread his comment and tell me what he means by “high status”. I’ll wait. Maybe I misunderstood it. Maybe you just wanted to come for me again. Who knows.
bachy
I guess I’m trying to say that I understand why CEOs enjoy being horsewhipped by dominatrices. There is something erotic about degrading sex when your day-to-day experience is generally Executive Suite/Preferred.
Not sure where you’re getting the “woke” angle…
ScottOnEarth
Right on! Giving and receiving facials is incredibly intimate, with the right partner. And, who gives a f**k what heterosexual prudes say? I would never gauge appropriate sexual behavior based on what those prudish hypocrites say and do.
Claytonisahobo
I love it if I am with the right partner. I find it intimate but also a bit degrading. Same as being called degrading names while in the act which I also enjoy. I know I love watching it happen in porn 🙂
305Ghuy
In porn, I find it disgusting; largely because the fella on the receiving end has a look that says “I’d rather be picking up dog dookie from the city park.” It looks like something that is being done ‘to’ the other man in the scene rather than an act experienced by both consenting parties.
SUPREME
it’s up to the individuals involved. i personally don’t mind it. when i first heard about tongue kissing, i thought it was the nastiest thing in the world and i would never do it. then i tried it and now i live for it. sometimes that all i need to do.
bachy
Haha! Oh yes, I know exactly what you’re saying. Quite a few of my sexual thrills started out with a feeling of revulsion!
BEPVA
It’s cool – but almost feels like a waste.
Shooting inside is the hottest for me – but that’s just my opinion.
No right or wrong here.
BigJohnSF
yes, I prefer suppositories to facials
Prax07
Not into facials, really does seem like a waste and I just don’t find them at all sexy, even when it’s in porn.
tjack47
I like it, giving or receiving. Actually, I like being splattered anywhere on my body. For me, it feels like the marking of territory. That’s primal, animalistic. I don’t think of it as sub, dom, alpha or beta. It’s two people consenting to a mutually pleasurable sex act.
bachy
oh wow i like the way you think…
UncleFloppy
Fine if you’re somewhere where there’s soap and running water to clean your face when you’re done. A definite no go if you’re somewhere without water.
baugera
Uncle Floppy…..just have him lick you clean!!!!!
305Ghuy
Hmm; or should I say “Mmm, Mmm Gooood”.
Facials and pearl necklaces, ah, I’ve pass. “Dame tu leche papi, en mi boca.” You say that when you’re on your knees in from of a guy and watch HIS reaction. You extract ‘the goods’ and leave them with weak legs.
Besides, less gooy clean up after the fireworks… and that stuff burns your eyes (wink)
judysdad
It’s a waste of good cum if you ask me. I’d rather take or give it in the mouth and swallow.
Mark Behar
Remember, semen (cum) is very alkaline and if it gets into your eyes it will burn. Also, if any nasty sexually transmitted germs are present in the cum or pre-ejaculate (pre-cum), than you may become infected if it ends up in your eye! Or inside your nose! Or throat!
And when going in for routine doctor visits, remember to let the clinician know so that right tests for gonorrhea and chlamydia (which are specific to only the organ they infect– in other words, an infection in the anus will NOT show up on a urine test, e.g.), and syphilis blood work are drawn!
A person can have a gonorrheal or chlamydial infection of the eye, throat, anus, urethra, or any other mucous membrane! (Although I must confess NEVER having seen a nasal infection caused by an STD, in 40 years of working in medicine!)
Consider This
Mark Behar – learned a number of things here and appreciate your posting. Will keep in mind for future STD prevention.
jim_allio
love getting a facial especially if I been edging and servicing a dude and if you take a pic with your load on my face
Tombear
What can I say, I love cum on my face or anywhere else the guy shoots his rock hard love muscle?
khan72
A very well kept beauty secret – Spermine, an organic compound found in semen
‘the only antioxidant that is capable of penetrating the horny layer of the skin’
“20-30 times stronger than vitamin E and offers numerous benefits including delayed cell ageing and UV protection.”
Den
But there is only about 20 mg/L of spermine in sperm, Apparently you can get more into your body by eating aged cheese, mushrooms, soy products, legumes, corn, and whole grains. I suspect that as a skin treatment, you’d need to have several “facials” day (though I bet some high priced cremes have spermine and spermidine in them, with patented names so people don’t get grossed out.
hotttt123
My intimate spunk story: after depositing anywhere on the body immediately lap it up and swap french kissing with my partner…the ultimate joining of the moment
nitejonboy
Well, great, now I’m hard as a rock,lol…give me directions, I’m coming over to watch,lol
mateo
Ditto!
Tom
I like getting facials butt more in me or swallow. Butt with the right guy.
NateOcean
I enjoy helping others build their self esteem.
LumpyPillows
I was wondering what this super kinky, weird thing was. Facials? Lol.
Yooper
Degrading? No.