Yesterday, Dharun Ravi officially apologized for spying on Tyler Clementi via webcam before Clementi committed suicide. Ravi is also going to willingly serve his 30 days in jail.
Great news, we guess?
Ravi’s apology came in the form of a press release—we mean, letter—from his attorney:
Last Monday, I was sentenced to 3 years probation, 300 hours of community service, a fine of more than $10,000.00, and 30 days in jail. Since the Middlesex County Prosecutor’s Office appealed that sentence, the sentence does not have to start until the appeal is decided. Nevertheless, I decided to accept and hopefully complete the sentence as soon as possible. It’s the only way I can go on with my life.
I accept responsibility for and regret my thoughtless, insensitive, immature, stupid and childish choices that I made on September 19, 2010 and September 21, 2010. My behavior and actions, which at no time were motivated by hate, bigotry, prejudice or desire to hurt, humiliate or embarrass anyone, were nonetheless the wrong choices and decisions. I apologize to everyone affected by those choices. I am surrendering myself to the Middlesex County Correctional Facility on Thursday, May 31, 2012, to start my 30-day period of imprisonment.
Technically speaking, this apology is absolutely necessary. Its sincerity, however, is seriously dubious. It’s only coming after his sentencing. If he was found not guilty or got a more lenient sentence (as if this isn’t lenient enough), would he have issued the same apology? Even Judge Glenn Berman displayed disdain at Ravi’s total lack of remorse.
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
“I heard this jury say, ‘guilty’ 288 times — 24 questions, 12 jurors. That’s the multiplication,” Berman said when Ravi was sentenced last month. “And I haven’t heard you apologize once.”
Ravi himself stated than any apology “would sound rehearsed and empty.” Bingo!
Ravi only cried when his own mother pleaded to the court for her son. His tears were for his mom’s hurt, not for the devastation he has caused the Clementi family.
Throughout the case, Ravi has repeated variations on this theme: “My behavior and actions—which at no time were motivated by hate, bigotry, prejudice or desire to hurt, humiliate or embarrass anyone—were nonetheless the wrong choices and decisions.”
Pray tell, then what were his motivations? Of course, just because he makes such a statement in no way makes it true.
Finally, Ravi says,”I apologize to everyone affected by those choices.” Even though it’s too little too late, he needs to apologize directly to the Clementi family. “Everyone” is a cowardly catch-all that exonerates him from facing head-on the specific human beings whose lives he destroyed.
If there’s any consolation, tomorrow Ravi marches right into prison.
David Ehrenstein
HE SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN THE FULL TEN YEARS!!!!!!!
Jose Rodriguez
Wow, he just becomes more evil and disgusting with every action. I can’t believe I was once in camp “he’s just a kid who made a mistake”. This guy is seriously trying to say he didn’t do what he did “with a desire to hurt, humiliate or embarrass” anyone. That is malicious right there. Honor a dead man’s memory by growing some balls and saying “you know what, I did a horrible thing that affected many lives and I will do whatever I can to make it up to Tyler’s family and the gay community”. Anything but “it wasn’t that I was trying to be mean y’all, I just kinda messed up a bit”. So incredibly grotesque.
Cam
The fact that it took him so long speaks volumes.
Say What...
I would like to know when this bigot will be deported back to India!
SteveC
He absolutely must be deported to India as soon as his sentence and probation is finished.
He is a foreign national and now he is a convicted criminal – why would the US allow convicted criminals from other countries to remain here?
Bob
@SteveC: Because his actions affected a gay man and contributed to his death. We are nothing to these people! This foreign piece of filth has more rights than we will ever have.
Lefty
Can I be the first to mention his in-no-way-irrelevant race and country of origin?
Lefty
Damn, always the bridesmaid never the bride.
Anyway, send him back, string him up and throw away the key!!!
Alan Brickman
Definately about Race….the guy killed himself because he thought being gay was worse than being alive…remember this people???
Rodrick
Ravi got what he deserved. Although people do dumb things all the time in college but he should not be held responsible for Tyler Clementi’s death. Tyler was obviously unstable and it was already public knowledge that Clementi’s was masturbating on cam with various guys. It’s quite a leap to paint him as this shy ingenue who was bullied by his homophobic roommate, which lead to him killing himself. Rational people don’t kill themselves, mentally disturbed people do. Ravi had no way of knowing that Clementi was unstable.
WillBFair
@Rodrick: Blame the victim. I hadn’t heard that one in three whole seconds. Did you invent it yourself? Or did learn it after years of research in the Vatican archives?
Larry
@SteveC: the judge said he is not going to deport him…the hate and vengeance coming from this site sound like you must be log cabin republicans
Mr. Enemabag Jones
It’s the only way I can go on with my life.
Lucky you. You still have a life to go on with.
B
Queerty’s article stated, “If he was found not guilty or got a more lenient sentence (as if this isn’t lenient enough), would he have issued the same apology?” Hopefully, but who knows? Being found not guilty does not mean you did not do something wrong – it means that you did not commit a crime – something made explicitly illegal by some statute.
Regarding No 12, “the judge said he is not going to deport him” … not exactly. The judge said he would not recommend deportation or recommend that Ravi not be deported. Either way, it is just a recommendation, and the federal government can make its own decision. In Ravi’s case, deportation would be more like exile – it seems he grew up here and might not have a clue as to get along in India. He might not even know an Indian language.
When Ravi said his behavior was “at no time were motivated by hate, bigotry, prejudice or desire to hurt, humiliate or embarrass anyone,” he could have been telling the truth – his motivation was possibly simply to impress his peers by being outrageous, and the though that he might “hurt, humiliate or embarrass anyone” might never have popped into his head. That’s the sort of behavior you might see in an immature, self-centered teenager. It’s more evident in German. Here, people sometimes say, “He is at an awkward age.” In German, the corresponding expression is, “Er ist in die Flegeljahren,” literally, “He is in the ‘loutyears’.”
Aki
@B:
Exactly how I see it
Lefty
@B: Yes, good points. 🙂
Hillers
His actions were not intended motivated by “by hate, bigotry, prejudice or desire to hurt, humiliate or embarrass anyone”???
That is absolute rubbish. At the very least, he intended to have a good laugh, along with his friends, at the expense of his faggot roommate. At least he could have written a genuine apology from his own words instead of this canned statement obviously written by his lawyer.
Those are going to be the longest 20 – 30 days of his life.
What the f**k
@B:All y’all ,who are saying deport him,seem to think that sending him back to India is like sending him to a penal colony.The reality is he could live the good life in India.Money would see to that-I occasionally holiday there and have a great time.So ,really ,where’s the punishment in that?You should keep him-then he can’t just recreate a life for himself-that smell of death won’t fade so quickly for him….and if he gets in trouble again he won’t be able to bribe officials with daddies money…just a thought.
What the f**k
@B: Oh,and B-you’re talking shit…..he might not know an Indian language…..virtually everyone speaks English!
Jazpyy
What are we supposed to do with this apology? “You would forget your head if it wasn’t screwed on now get out of here you little sod you”?
David Ehrenstein
@WillBFair: “Roderick” is part of a concerted effort on the part of the Ravi camp to discredit Tyler Clementi. They are posting LIES like this all over the net.
David Ehrenstein
@B: “he could have been telling the truth” But of course he wasn’t. “Keep the gays away!” was the truth.
Aki
@What the f**k:
But it is a foreign country for somebody who left it as a child and grew up in the US and has his family in the USA. It’s not like he just left India and came over to study. I have no problem with deportation for violent offenders but I have a problem with people wanting to ship a 20 year old out of the country he grew up and lived in for most of his life for a non violent first offense.
Especially because I can’t see him ever getting so much as a parking ticket again.
David Ehrenstein
@Aki: And I see a full bore life of crime ahead for the creep.
“it is a foreign country for somebody who left it as a child and grew up in the US and has his family in the USA.”
BOO F’N HOO!
Lefty
@What the f**k: “virtually everyone speaks English!”
lol
B
No. 18 · “What the f**k” wrote, “@B: Oh,and B-you’re talking shit…..he might not know an Indian language…..virtually everyone speaks English!”
Not true – most well-educated Indians speak English and use it as a common language due to there being quite a number of different languages used in India, but for the population as a whole, English is not anywhere close to the dominant language.
BTW, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_languages_by_number_of_native_speakers_in_India has a list from the 2001 census – at that time, India had 178,598 English speakers compared to 422,048,642 who spoke Hindi (which accounts for 40.03% of the population).
If you spoke only English, your employment options would be limited – while you could easily converse with educated co-workers, if you had to deal with the general public, you would not be able to converse with many of them.
What the f**k
@Lefty: Well you can blame that on colonialism.
B
No. 21 · David Ehrenstein wrote, “@B: “he could have been telling the truth” But of course he wasn’t. “Keep the gays away!” was the truth.”
David, go back and look up what actually happened. He was exchanging text messages or chatting with his friends. One of them joked about his gay roommate hopping into bed with him and he replied that he had his computer set up to prevent that, adding “keep away the gays” or whatever as a sound-byte summary. It was merely silly banter and he was being a wise guy. In context, he meant keep them out of his bed (especially if he was in it at the time).
B
Re No 17: “All y’all ,who are saying deport him,seem to think that sending him back to India is like sending him to a penal colony.The reality is he could live the good life in India.”
The reality is that, without knowing how Indian society functions, and possibly with no language skills in a native Indian language, chances are that he would have difficulty finding employment. If his family supported him financially, he might be just fine, but that requires punishing his family, and his family had nothing to do with setting up web cams to spy on people.
What the f**k
@B: I did not say that it was the first language,but as I mentioned previously India was subject to colonialism and as such most of the population ,educated or not ,has a grasp of the English language.I tell you what- get on a plane,go there and see if you have any difficulty being understood- don’t just sit at your computer firing off Wikipedia statistics at me. The point of my original post was deportation to India is not the horror that a lot of you seem to think!…and as such is not really punishment..in fact I would go as far as to say that it might for him be less painful than staying in a country where people know what you have done,than creating a life with an ,ostensibly,clean sheet.However,I’m glad to see you research before coming back at me-in the future can I suggest that Wikipedia’s not the most reliable of sources.
What the f**k
@B: Twaddle…there’s call centres for a start….jeez ,and one of the requirements is SPEAKING ENGLISH!
What the f**k
@What the f**k: And any way where’s all this concern for the little sh*t coming from…oh what if he couldn’t cope …personally I hope he can’t cope…with life or what he’s done!
Jakey
It’s not all that convincing when you reel off a list of the things that didn’t motivate you (I’m not a homophobe guys, for reals!) but never get around to saying what DID motivate you. I think the day when he volunteers that information will not come in our lifetimes. Boy, I hope I never see this dude in person. I think I really will not be able to resist the urge to spit on him.
ok123
Lets be honest he is not sorry, he does not seem to believe what he did was wrong, he will not be deported and he will most likely have a very good life and never think twice about the victim or his 30 day punishment. And that is sadly how this world works.
B
No. 29 · “What the f**k” acted silly by saying, “@B: I did not say that it was the first language,but as I mentioned previously India was subject to colonialism and as such most of the population ,educated or not ,has a grasp of the English language.I tell you what- get on a plane,go there and see if you have any difficulty being understood- don’t just sit at your computer firing off Wikipedia statistics at me.”
FYI I’ve been in India, although it was on a trip to a nearby country so we didn’t spend much time there. You don’t want to see statistics because they give a more accurate picture than your personal observations – you hardly would have had a chance to visit most of the country. While many people may have a “grasp of English”, that is not good enough to get by in a job, particularly where you might have to talk to a lot of people.
As to your “call center” thing, read http://www.time.com/time/business/article/0,8599,1671982,00.html – “The work is tiring and stressful and offers few career advancement opportunities, says Dr. A. Sankara Reddy, head of Sri Venkateswara College in New Delhi. In response to students’ complaints, Reddy said the college a few months ago banned call center recruiters from campus.” And, “Although the country produces hundreds of thousands of graduates each year, many lack the skills — in some cases, fluency in English — to be employed.” So much for your “virtually everyone speaks English” claim.
B
Re No. 29 · “What the f**k” tried a silly ploy, “before coming back at me-in the future can I suggest that Wikipedia’s not the most reliable of sources.”
Of course, an article in Nature showed that on technical topics, the Wikipedia is comparable to the Encyclopedia Britannica in accuracy, but I guess you didn’t know that so you tried a silly ploy. Had you actually bothered to read the Wikipedia article I cited, you would have notice that it reported results from the 2001 census in India. That’s the original source. Do you have a reason to doubt the accuracy of that census? As to the Wikipedia contributors, all they had to do was to copy the numbers from the census accurately – hardly a big deal.
Let me suggest that you drop your self importance and actually check the facts before spouting off. Basically, you got nearly everything wrong.
Steve
The primary, important feature of this “apology” is, that it is “from his attorney”. This is not an actual apology by Mr Ravi. It is a carefully worded legal document, designed to assist his clients appeal. I get the very distinct impression that Mr. Ravi, to this day, still does not believe that he did anything wrong.
What the f**k
@B: B – if I had the time to spend checking statistics that are often contested I’d have no life..like you!You bring up statistics from 2001!And they are statistics that are contested .You also throw in the fact that you’ve been to India..but didn’t spend much time there?I repeat I have had no problems conversing with anyone in India.You bring up wikipedia’s innate trustworthiness when anyone can doctor and alter whatever they like with ease,and I know this because I know people featured on the site..many!And know the bullshit that’s represented as truth.I’m reading you as a prig who’s an apologist for a little sh*t and the fact that you run around the Internet trying to find statistics to back up your theories doesn’t make you correct.I don’t need to enact “silly ploys” I deal straight.Get off my dick! P.s when it comes to self importance you’ve got that covered!
Alexi3
@Larry: the judge has no power to deport him or to allow him to stay. That matter is completely in the hands of the INS.
What the f**k
@What the f**k:@What the f**k: Oh and if you come back with more statistics do make them current,there’s a dear.
Alexi3
@Steve: I have no way of knowing whether his apology is sincere or not, but, I’m quite sure that an attorney would have never inserted the phrase; “It is the only way I can get on with my life”. An attorney would have seen this as potentially sabatoging the whole apology as it shifts attention from acknowledging the damage his actions caused and back onto Ravi’s concern for himself.
B
No. 37 · “What the f**k”reduced himself to lying by saying, “@B: B – if I had the time to spend checking statistics that are often contested I’d have no life..like you!You bring up statistics from 2001!And they are statistics that are contested.”
LOL. It took a few minutes to find those statistics via a Google search and they are not in any sense “contested” as they are the statistics obtained by the 2001 census. It is not like you’d expect the number of English speakers in India as a fraction of the population to change radically over the last 10 years by factors of 10 or more. If a few minutes checking what you post means you would “have no life”, I’ve really got to wonder about you.
Then you go on to say, “I repeat I have had no problems conversing with anyone in India.” I.e., you went to places that are popular with tourists, not rural villages in isolated areas. Your experience does not constitute a representative sample of India’s citizens.
Then you say, “You bring up wikipedia’s innate trustworthiness when anyone can doctor and alter whatever they like with ease.” Yet the data show that this is not a problem in technical areas. See http://www.nature.com/nature/journal/v438/n7070/full/438900a.html (the article appeared in 2005, so this is not exactly new). Where Wikipedia has had issues are in things like biographies of politicians, where people have an incentive to try to lie. That doesn’t happen with technical articles. In this case, nobody has an incentive to lie about the census results regarding language usage in India.
aki
@ok123:
I think he knows exactly what he did wrong but he’s not going to hang Tylers suicide around his neck and that seems to piss off some people who want him flogged for it. The only person responsible for Tylers suicide is Tyler . People have a free will.
What the f**k
Oh alright here’s a statistic for 2012 – ranked 2 of countries with citizens who can speak English 232,226,449 wikipedia also ranks india@ no.2 @ 125,226,449 total English speakers-quite a jump.
According to the Times of India-regarding the 2001 census English is the second
language of India 86million and another 39million as their third language.the only language to have more speakers is Hindi 551.4million-as this is the 2001census and considering Indians progression this decade the 2001 census is going to be outmoded…..you’re on here accusing me of all sorts and yet shy away from the fact that the reason you were on here originally is as a APOLOGIST for the indefensible . Now go and F**k yourself!
What the f**k
@What the f**k: The first statistic :exploredia.
What the f**k
@What the f**k: An apologist.
Daez
@WillBFair: The victim here is the family of Clementi. However, I am pretty sure Tyler will not be returning from the grave to issue an apology anytime soon. Suicide is the ultimate selfishness.
Daez
@David Ehrenstein: Since the only crime he was convicted of was lying to the police, which is something that everyone that has ever been given a traffic ticket most likely has done…
I do not see where you think he is some sort of hardened criminal. He pulled a college prank. There are many college pranks pulled every single day. Many are much worse than what he did. It was Tyler that was the issue here. There were much better ways to handle it than jumping off a bridge.
B
No. 43 · What the f**k wrote, “Oh alright here’s a statistic for 2012 –” LOL – all we have is your word for it with no citation. Didn’t anyone tell you how to cite things?
Even funnier, even using your numbers, you end up with a 125 million alleged English speakers (some as their third language, with no indication of proficiency). Meanwhile, India’s population is over 1 billion, so your claim is that slightly more than 10 percent of the population knows English. And that was just the point – Ravi would have trouble getting by there due to linguistic constraints and not knowing the culture and in general how society functions.
Then you lied by writing some crap, “originally is as a APOLOGIST for the indefensible.” In reality, I merely pointed out things his defense attorney might try and pointed out some of the difficulties the prosecutor faced, and that a few things did not make sense. I also pointed out what the law actually said – which is what the prosecutor had to prove actually happened. If I were apologizing for Ravi, I would hardly have pointed out that, if Ravi was partly or fully responsible for the suicide, it might be the result of some privately conveyed threat, not merely someone seeing a few seconds of kissing, something we’ll never know as the victim for obvious reasons cannot testify.
I really don’t believe there was a suicide due to someone seeing a kiss. Something else was probably going on. We just don’t know what that was.
What the f**k
But ,if you bothered to read the citation underneath you would know tat that omission was corrected ! “with no indication of proficiency” HA HA HA HA HA !YOU SEMANTIC WIELDING TWAT, Accusing me of LYING,VISITING TOURIST AREAS ! SILLY PLOYS???…YOU ARE AN ABSOLUTE HILARITY …….I REALLY COULD NOT CARE LESS ABOUT YOUR ALLEGATIONS…GO FORTH MY CHILD … Your perspective ,the points you have made continually are APOLOGIST!… You have no idea how Indian society works…you haven’t even spent any meaningful time there by your own admission and PRESUMING how my time was spent makes you a presumptuous little bitch. YOU REALLY ARE A FRAUD who thinks that dancing around words wins you an argument…I SEE YOU !AND REGARDING YOUR FINAL COMMENT…OBVIOUSLY HE WAS FRAGILE ….BUT RAVI’S ACTIONS PUSHED TYLER OVER THE EDGE…WITH THE EMPHASIS ON PUSHED!You ask for statistics ..you got em…they were clarified …and ya still want to f**k….?……!!!
What the f**k
@What the f**k:Omit tat.
What the f**k
And the 125 million is for2011…..eleven years ago…. And then you ignore 2012 statistic!!!!Come back correct ya undercover imbecile!
What the f**k
@What the f**k: Correction 2001
What the f**k
I really have to deal with this I pads predictive text..so fucking annoying!
!what the F**K!!!!
Oh,and one more thing your reliance on census statistics is flawed…in 2011 the British home office census published their findings on the number of gay people in Britain…apparently gay people constitute 1% of the population..a down grade from the widely perceived 10% … and everyone of us know that’s BULLSHIT!! So come back on that!! I can’t wait for this!……
B
No. 51 · “What the f**k” made a fool of himself by writing, “And the 125 million is for2011…..eleven years ago…. And then you ignore 2012 statistic!!!!Come back correct ya undercover imbecile!” Even with subsequent correction (claiming he meant 2001, not 2011), the 125 million number was the one he himself gave in No. 43, where he claimed it was for the year 2012!
This guy can’t even remember what he himself said!
Then in No 54, he writes, “Oh,and one more thing your reliance on census statistics is flawed…in 2011 the British home office census published their findings on the number of gay people in Britain…apparently gay people constitute 1% of the population..a down grade from the widely perceived 10%”
He apparently doesn’t know that estimates of the fraction of the population that is gay typically range from 1 to 3 percent, where by “gay” they mean exclusively gay. The 10% number includes bisexuals and perhaps people who “experiment”. You’ll get a different answer if the question is “are you attracted to men” versus “did you get a blow job from some guy this year because you were so horny that you couldn’t wait.” It is further complicated by the fact that people frequently lie about sex. Meanwhile, there is no incentive to lie about what languages you speak.
D P
I still hope the Clementi family takes this further to civil court. I really suspect that that was an option Judge Berman was setting up for: the better chance for a civil case to succeed.
-Without a doubt Dharun Ravi is liable. Judge Berman even cited the gravity of Ravi’s guilt by stating a quantified number of guilty decisions at 288. This is well beyond a doubt.
-The prosecution could not introduce a charge of Ravi’s causing Clementi’s death, without weakening their case.
-Judge Berman focused specifically on Ravi’s lack of remorse and stated so for the record. This only adds one more argument in support of plaintiff’s charges.
-Consider, too, that with such a sentence levied in criminal court, Judge Berman set the stage that Ravi probably will not be deported, thus keeping Ravi within a jurisdictional reach that will allow the Clementi family to sue through civil court. Think of how difficult it would have been had Ravi been deported back to India?
I think it would be just and proper for the Clementi family to pursue that course.
!what the F**K!!!!
Now you’re just being plain stupid- I gave you the 2012 statistic at the beginning of 43 and in the post just after clarified where it came from !And your insistence that your right makes you look the fool… I could really go on with you forever but the simple truth is I read you correctly and I am not gonna waste my valuable time dealing with a queen as stunted as yourself.You deal in semantics ,estimates ,statistics and bullshit all you like….This was indeed fun,but for this post I’m done…come back throw an insult ,cloud an issue ,commit hari kari on the alter of pomposity-no amount of prevaricating that your right and I’m wrong is going to make a difference to myself,or indeed any one else. Have the last word-avoid all points thrown at you and try not to drown in your unfounded smugness-Have a nice day!
B
No. 57 · “!what the F**K!!!!” acted like a little boy with his hand caught in the cookie jar by saying, “Now you’re just being plain stupid.”
Reality – this character gave a number (no citation) which he claimed was for 2012. I pointed out what the number implied so he pretended it was from 2001. When it was pointed out that it was his own number and that he claimed it was for 2012, he started to resort to childish name calling to cover up his inability to read.