UPDATE: Retired Gay NFL Player Esera Tuaolo Allegedly Assaulted His Current Partner

Retired NFL defensive lineman Esera Tuaolo, who came out in 2002 after nine years playing pro, was arrested and charged with with domestic assault and disorderly conduct this week. While there’s no information on the identity of his alleged victim, he’s previously spoken to reporters about raising twins, a boy and a girl who are about 10 now, with his partner Mitchell Wherley. They have refs for tackling people off the field; they’re called “police.”

UPDATE: Says Tualo in a statement clarified that the alleged victim was not Wherley (his ex) but his current boyfriend: “This is a private situation that has gotten blown out of proportion by the media. My personal relationship is very dear to my heart, and it upsets me deeply that this private matter now has to be played out in front of the public. I love my boyfriend, and I am now focused on my loving family; I ask everyone for privacy as we work through this.”

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    OMG!!! Someone in a GAY relationship allegedley assaults their partner…….HUGE news!! Because everyone knows this never ever happens in a straight relationship………….

  • Revemupman

    Sometimes your partner just pisses you off…

  • billygfa

    Having met him, I really hope this is not true. He seems like a nice guy and they seemed very happy. I agree with the first comment though. Any other celebrity we would just roll our eyes without the “gasp” these days. Let them work it out in peace.

  • NiceGuy

    Uh, I met his pretty-boy partner as he tried picking up guy after guy at a party using various names. I wouldn’t be surprised by this.

    Having said that, there’s never an excuse for domestic assault. Say it ain’t so, Esera.

  • Chris

    And you know what else I heard? They once had a fight over how to load the dishwasher! The horror!

  • Erick

    I dont know if its the same guy, but Esera appeared with his then partner in the Donny Deutsch Show back at the beginning when it was sort of good.

    As I understand it they had been together for a while, while he was playing even, they had pictures with the kids an everything, very cute family.

    Sad to know domestic abuse may be a part of that now. I hope that, whatever it was, they work it out and get the help they need to resolve it.

  • Scott Rose

    The gay community empowers abusers by paying too little attention to the existence of domestic violence in gay relationships.

    Gay so-called “leaders” are so afraid of creating distractions from such issues as marital rights and repeal of DADT that they don’t want to raise the question of gay domestic violence at all.

    That in a way is a capitulation to bigotry that reinforces the bigotry. The thinking is that by talking about gay domestic violence one would attract too much negative attention from non-gay persons.

    But the fact is, domestic violence occurs at the same rate in straight relationships as in gay ones.

    Abusers and their victims, by the way, should never, ever be encouraged to “work it out.” Abusers are psychopaths that 1) take pleasure from hurting their victims both emotionally and physically; 2) do not feel any empathy for their victims; 3) know that what they are doing is frowned upon, and also know how to hide it from society, including for example by telling the victim “if you tell outsiders the truth about this relationship, I will kill you.” Additionally, an abuser and his victim should never go to therapy together because the abuser will only use the therapy sessions as another forum for manipulating the victim.

    The fact that a commentor above said “Let them work it out in peace” is indicative of GLBT ignorance regarding domestic violence.

    The GLBT community could better protect its own by publishing the names and photographs of convicted abusers along with the stories of exactly what the criminal justice system found them guilty of.

  • alan brickman

    Everybody knows his new bf is a skank looking for cash…Poor Esera…

  • Kris

    I’d date Esera Tuaolo, but if he’d do something like that to me…I’d more than likely leave.

  • Kim

    Dang I didnt know he broke up with his other partner they were on the Rosie Cruise special a few years ago.

  • Tommy

    @Scott Rose:
    I agree, Scott. But sometimes abuse is more complex particularly in gay male relationships. There is not always one abuser and one victim. Sometimes both parties are physically abusing each other at different times. In those cases, however I don’t think therapy works. Some people just bring out the worst in each other and need to go their separate ways.
    But I do agree we as a community excuse violence by gay people. Look at Boy George who is considered a gay icon. He handcuffed an escort to the wall and beat the person with a chain. But in general our community excused his behavior and continues to praise him as an icon in the press.

  • I know!

    This happened. I’ve seen the pictures. Esera beat the crap out of his boyfriend. He should be locked up. Honestly, he is a freak on steroids. This isn’t the first time he beat him up either. That asshole is over twice the size of his now ex. What a peice of shit. There are no excuses for this kind of violence! Esera you are a freaking loser wannabe famous NOBODY!

  • random bear

    Not getting famous simply off of being gay must burn.

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