Jacob, 24, lives in New York City and defines their identity without using labels. As Jacob puts it, “it’s about embracing the fact that gender is complicated.”
“The complexity,” Jacob says, “is what makes it so beautiful.”
Below, hear how Jacob discovered the term “genderqueer,” how it’s different from identifying as gay, and what it means to them.
For more of Jacob’s story and to learn more about fluid gender identity, MTV will present the full episode of True Life: I’m Genderqueer, tonight at 11 p.m. ET.
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The show is airing in conjunction with transgender awareness week.
SeeingAll
He’s working too hard at it for the TV show. Some guys just wind up with both a c–k and tits without even trying.
Tackle
This is wonderful!
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
When is it not
Bob LaBlah
Sorry, but I don’t quite get this one.
dwes09
Seems to me he is simply a feminine man of uncertain sexuality (maybe bi, maybe not) who also has a fetish for the conventional trappings of femininity and wants to legitimize that with a trendy label. I simply do not get what people mean by “genderqueer”. But then that is the problem with “queer theory”, or all social theory for that matter. It is not Empirical theory, but simply made up self-referential excuses.
If he does not feel like he is in the wrong body (that he is truly a woman) he is not transsexual (as there are only two genders, male and female). And he is either gay, bi, asexual, or straight. Were he simply androgynous he would be more understandable, but he clearly likes dressing “as a woman” despite it being costly, uncomfortable, restrictive of movement, and inconvenient. Even women prefer functional sensible clothing most of the time these days.
I’d love to hear someone defend his self labeling in an intelligent and rational fashion! I’d also love to hear a transsexual person’s take on this.
Avery Alvarez
“Jacob, 24… defines their identity without using labels”
“Below, hear how Jacob discovered the term “genderqueer”
I never believe people when they say they don’t like labels. Usually they label themselves 1000 different ways. It’s usually labels that they don’t like, or don’t find trendy enough that they don’t like.
Interesting story, none the less.
Masc Pride
I think all this “genderqueer” nonsense is a way for people with control issues to play word/thought police and instruct others on the “proper” way to address them. This True Life seems to be full of control freaks who are whining about people referring to them as the sex they’re trying so hard to look like. CRAZY!
Alexander R. Rodriguez
Thank you for reminding us why hundreds of gay men are done withe the Gay Left and gay rights movement
joe
NURSE ! NURSE!!!!!!!!
candylaine
@Masc Pride: asking you to address a person by the term you prefer isn’t controlling you. it’s asking you to listen and be respectful.
candylaine
@dwes09: a person’s experience of their own gender is empirical, in the sense that it can be described and documented, just as much as a gay person’s idea of their sexuality is empirical in the same sense.
candylaine
@Avery Alvarez: maybe it’s not about finding a “trendy” label, but rather one that more adequalety describes their situation. a lot of people like “queer” terms because the binaries of gender and sexuality (gay straight man woman) don’t adequately describe them. the gap between “the thing” and “the word,” as we all know, is vast.
candylaine
@Alexander R. Rodriguez: and closed-minded people like you remind me of why we need to keep fighting and educating people.
candylaine
@Alexander R. Rodriguez: also, just a side note: the gay left and gay rights movement are why you don’t have to live in the closet in fear anymore. ingrate.
Avery Alvarez
@candylaine: Or maybe it is about finding a “trendy” label.
Semantics, I know.
But what you’ve said doesn’t really add any nobility to what could be describe as narcissism.
candylaine
@Avery Alvarez: everyone is narcissistic. it’s narcissistic to think you know better than someone else’s about their own sexuality or gender. i find a lot of gay men’s resistance to trans and non-binary issues a bit confounding. sexuality is clearly a spectrum (some people sleep with both men and women, some people only once in a while, etc) and gender is also clearly a spectrum. so why the insistence on binaries? i just don’t get it. is transgenderism a threatening concept to your gay sexuality, and if so, why?
Avery Alvarez
@candylaine: “everyone is narcissistic”
Thanks for providing the best example of that, SJW.
Your safe space is located that way ———>
candylaine
i’d take SJW over whatever you are any day.
your stubborn, uncaring and insensitive space is… wait for it… up yours.
Giancarlo85
@dwes09: it seems to me you have no clue what you are talking about. He can be whatever he wants to be without being judged and ridiculed by people like you.
@Alexander R. Rodriguez: You are more happy serving people who hate your very existence. Bravo one post, one line troll.
Giancarlo85
@Masc Pride: What a failed swipe. That’s all you’re about. I think you’re trying to control people with your stupid “masc pride” label. I think you’re trying to tell us how we should think of you. You know what I think you are? A whiny queen who tries so hard to be masculine but fails miserably.
alphacentauri
Jacob is a drag queen and nothing more, and is trying to be edgy when he’s your garden variety drag queen and not that good at it.
Kevin Wotipka
We barely understand each other. We shouldn’t tell him what he is.
BTW, I got a “YOU’RE POSTING COMMENTS TOO QUICKLY” when I hadn’t posted anything in literally hours, yet again. I wish Queerty would fix that.
Giancarlo85
@alphacentauri: BULLSHIT. He isn’t a drag queen. Learn what a drag queen is before you even post.
Masc Pride
@candylaine: I was married for three years, I know a control game when I see one.
Alistair Wiseman
I believe this Queerty story is example #2,746 of why they don’t like us.
Giancarlo85
@Alistair Wiseman: Who don’t like us? The republican party? So? Why do you keep voting for them?
Glücklich
So that’s what happened to Vanna White’s ’90’s hand-me-downs. Egads!
sportsguy1983
Genderqueer? WTF!?!?
SeeingAll
The Bride of Sing Sing.
Rogério Machado
Genderwhat? He’s a gay man who likes to dress as a woman. No need for labeling yourself as a “genderqueer”.
And you can call me narrow minded or whatever, but I just can’t grasp the idea of these new “orientations”. Sorry
JessPH
Genderqueer? Please. You’re a boy in a dress. Period.
Bauhaus
Their legs are ravishing in the red mini, with that nice bit of scruff… I’d be all over their!
NateOcean
Masc Pride has it right about the “control” stuff.
I’ve a transgender friend who is still biologically male.
On a good day she dresses nicely as a woman.
But when the bipolar mood kicks in, she’ll dress as a tomboy, then bitch about it when a stranger mistakes her for a male (which technically she stil is).
Anything to get attention.
And don’t get me started on the endless lectures about “pronouns”.
alphacentauri
@Giancarlo85:He’s a poor excuse for a drag queen.
candylaine
@Rogério Machado: he can label himself anything he chooses.
Avery Alvarez
@candylaine: You’re an oversensitive, coddled baby.
Like any baby, you tried to turn this whole thing into gay men vs trans.
If you’re not confident in your “trendy” identity, that’s your fault.
Your desperate need for validation, though, is pathetic.
Cry me a river
go on and just
cry me a river
go on and just
Giancarlo85
@alphacentauri: Except he isn’t a drag queen.
Typical ignorance on here. It is hilarious how some of you can’t handle people different than you, yet demand respect for yourselves. It doesn’t surprise me how hypocritical and bigoted some gay men can be. You are projecting your own insecurities. Leave the guy alone. And nobody is forcing you to do anything. If you sensitive and incapable of accepting others, then leave them alone.
Masc Pride
“If you sensitive and incapable of accepting others, then leave them alone.”
If only it could take its own advice.