Dirty Domino’s Employee Can’t Find Work in Fast Food. THANK GOD

Kristy Hammonds and Michael Setzer filmed themselves doing disgusting things to the food at Domino’s, where they worked — until they were fired and faced criminal charges after uploading the stunt to YouTube, where it’s been viewed more than a million times. (On the video, they both say they’re gay.) Now Hammonds, 31, who’s raising two kids she conceived through a sperm donor, says the incident has kept her from finding work at other fast food restaurants, which is apparently the only industry she’s qualified to work. Strike that, she’s not even qualified to work there. Amusingly enough, Hammonds got YouTube to pull the video with a copyright claim, even though SHE’S THE ONE WHO UPLOADED IT IN THE FIRST PLACE. Keeping her out of restaurants will save more lives than eliminating swine flu.