Don’t Be A Fool, Wrap Your Tool: Queerty’s Top 10 Condom Picks


3. Lifestyle Fun Bumps

Imagine all the fun of bubble wrap combined with several hours of love making; designed with 420 raised studs, there is really no unsafe equivalent to the Lifestyle Fun Bumps condom. With such unique grooves, every single position and every single thrust offers a brand new sensation for you and your partner — ‘Nuff said, right?


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  • Jeton Ademaj

    how silly. only #4 and #8 have a snowball’s chance in hell of being successful standouts, #4 bcuz the “baggy at frenulum” design due is really the only serious sensuality innovation in the pack here (the Trojan “Ecstasy” condom and the Pleasure Plus baggy-underside one also use that principle), and the Origami anal condom empowers bottoms to take control.

    for actual pleasure, none of these will approach real sex…aka bareback, raw, barrier-free, “unprotected” sex…tho one can actually be raw and VERY protected with proper chemoprophylaxis. when one of these companies wins that Gates Foundation prize money for designing a truly pleasurable condom, get back to me.

    i’ll be safely and savagely breeding asses with a smile in the meantime.

  • NateB79

    Aren’t you the same guy from the Stern Fan Network that is constantly telling everyone that your HIV medication keeps your “viral load” down so low that you can safely have bareback sex without telling your partners that you are, in fact, HIV positive?

  • Jackhoffsky

    And aren’t you aware that just because a person’s “viral load” is down or they are “undetectable” (which means nothing) HIV medication works in the blood and doesn’t always get absorbed in the deeper areas of the body, so whereas your viral load may be low in blood work, they may still be potent in your semen?

    That is why even with the healthiest person taking his meds regularly, there is still about a 4 to 8 percent (someone verify that) chance of infecting that savagely breeded ass.

  • Jeton Ademaj

    @NateB79: nice troll attempt…except that i always disclose, i make no unsupported claims about “undetectability”, and have never said/posted online any different. prove otherwise or DIAF. :)

  • Jeton Ademaj

    @Jackhoffsky: an SFN reunion i see. hiv meds reach the male genitalia readily, and there is a recognized lag between suppression of viral load in blood plasma versus in semen. that lag is 6 months for most, a subgroup needing upwards of a year…and in all cases within 3 years of HIV undetectability in blood, there is undetectability in semen. this is for a fully effective 3-drug ARV combo. in enhanced combos with more ARv drugs, that lag is shortened much faster.

    furthermore, at all points, X viral load in blood and X viral load in semen are never equivalent markers of virulence…because seminal viral load always has a much higher percentage of inactive viral debris, partial viral particles that are noninfectious, etc.

    the science now is much more damning for your trolling, everything i wrote years ago is nicely vindicated. go look it all up.

  • Jeton Ademaj

    @Jackhoffsky: ooh, fergot to add that your percentile figure (4%) is based on press reporting of HPTN 052, a study in hetero mixed-status couples that found effective HIV medication prevented the infection of others. that “96% reduction of risk” figure is based on a single infection, however that infection occurred in a couple where the HIV+ partner had only become “undetectable” a few weeks earlier, NOT the 6 month minimum of sustained undetectability, medication adherence and absence of other std’s which together form the basis of the “undetectable is safe” paradigm.

    poz people, get on the right meds, stay on them, and f*ck your brains out guilt free. neg people, help them do it…because it protects you as well.

  • Charlie in Charge

    Big fan of the Lifestyles X-tra pleasure with it’s inflated tip similar to the Inspiral on this list. The extra space around the head leads to good times and a lot less breakage of the condom.

  • PSPoolside

    Magnum XL isn’t just a conversation starter, it’s a penis saver. Only brand that doesn’t hurt like hell.

  • NateB79

    @Jeton Ademaj: It’s not a troll attempt. I have just seen the threads where it gets brought up that you and your husband don’t disclose. Don’t get me wrong, I couldn’t care less, that’s between you and the trick you bring home. I was just curious if you were the same person, because you always use the same terms to try to be as graphic as possible. So whatever. Oh and grow up with your DIAF nonsense. What are you 15?

  • Jackhoffsky

    I believe a “trolling” attempt would be a more accurate description to the person trying to justify bareback sex on a post that is trying to show the pleasurable side of safe sex.

    But I can tell you put a lot of effort justifying your type of sex, and I think that’s admirable.

  • ToptoBottomNYC

    Kiss of Mint is out of production. RIP :(

  • Jackhoffsky

    @ToptoBottomNYC: durex still has a line of tropical flavors. it’s not the same but…

  • Scooteroo

    My favorite is missing… Trojan Bareskin. I’ll have to give the Crown (#1) a try, but the Bareskin is the closest I have found to having nothing on at all.

  • Kevin

    My personal favorite is missing… Lifestyle Skyn condoms, made with polyisoprene. It’s a little pricier than other condoms, but for a bottom, these are a godsend. I can’t stand ribbed or otherwise textured condoms, because it creates undesirable friction that results in chafing. Polyurethane condoms do the same thing when they fold upon themselves, resembling a plastic lunch bag. Skyns slide in and out very smoothly, making for a much more comfortable experience for the bottom. Oh, and they come in large sizes too.

  • mhubba

    Let me start by letting folks know I’m a huge fan of condoms and a power user.

    This product placement wrapped in uninformed, judgmental, outdated, stigmatizing crap doesn’t constitute writing.

    It’s also full of mis-education.

    A. Kiss of Mint condoms have been out of production for some time.
    B. Beyond Seven condoms are for those who seek a snugger fit – a recipe for failure for those who don’t.
    C. Both new oragami condoms are an experimental and unapproved, and only available in clinical trials.
    D. Flavored, lubed condoms? To cover crotch odor? Really? Are you serious?

    Fact check much? Of course not.

  • Jeton Ademaj

    @NateB79: Nate, if you’re going to lie in an intentionally libelous way, at least make it something that isnt easily called-out. LINK to evidence of these lies you’re telling, instead of simply repeating them…like a bad troll. ;-)

    to MHUBBA: great post!

  • Fitz

    To each their own. I ONLY fuck raw. I am 100% fine with a guy saying no-thanks, but 95% of the time it’s not a problem. I am fine just hanging out and jerking it– but I am not into sex with bags.

  • Niall

    Honestly if people want to fuck bareback, find a stable partner and go at it. I still find it very stupid that in this day and age and knowing what we do, people will still recklessly fuck bareback, just because “it feels better without a condom”

  • GerryB

    @Jeton Ademaj: Your post is very interesting. Do you have a reference to studies regarding risk of unprotected sex for the active partner of a HIV pos guy who has undetectable viral load for over 6 months?

Comments are closed.