Dutch Scientist: Smoking and Stress Makes Babies Gay

smokingOhhhhhhh, so that’s what made us gay: our moms were all stressed-out chain-smoking meth addicts.

Okay, that’s an oversimplification. But Dick Swaab, a scientist at Amsterdam Biology, has just concluded a study that correlates stress with LGBT offspring.

That stress can take a variety of forms. It could be emotional stress, or it could be chemical. Smoking, drinking and drugs were all found to raise cortisol levels in pregnant women, as one might expect. And that, in turn, affected the fetus’ sex hormones. Then somehow — and this is the part that needs further study — that made the kids grow up to be gay.

In other words, it’s the mother’s heterosexual lifestyle that makes kids gay.

Of course nobody’s quite sure yet how this whole process works. And there’s no complete picture yet for how you get from elevated cortisol in a womb to a lifetime predilection for musical theater.

This study apparently isn’t going over too well with Ben Summerskill, head of the UK civil rights group Stonewall. “There does not seem to be a shred of evidence to support the idea that a mother’s lifestyle changes a child’s sexuality,” he said in response.

Well, there you have it. Scientist says one thing, civil rights guy says the opposite. Science!

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  • CalgaryBill

    Let’s see the name; then his credibility can be examined, including whether he made the imputed statement and if his ‘research’ has been forwarded to a credible peer-researching journal. I see an article like this and assume its credibility is about as high as cold fusion was in its release.

  • Baileynl

    The danger of statistics. Statistics can show correlation between the number of storks in a certain area and the number of babies being born. This does not mean that the two are related. Exactly the reason why you should always have a credible theory on how the two are thought to be related if you find correlation in your data. At least from the article this is missing.

    I am dutch though so perhaps a bit on the defence but “Amsterdam biology” does not exist and there is no reference at all to the study. Bit difficult to check the credibility of this story.

  • jkb

    Is that why all poor people who smoke and are stressed out due to no money have tons of gay babies?

  • victorginori


  • dougmc92

    I did read a report from German once that said stress on the mother during pregnancy had something to do with it… a higher number of gay Germans were born during and immediately after WW2.

  • macmantoo

    If that’s the case then most of the kids born in the 50’s and 60’s were gay. Most of the parents smoked and there was lot of stuff making people stressed in those years.

  • Andrew Yang

    This is one of the weirdest things I have heard.

  • damon459

    Sounds like more bullshit pseudo science to me, after all my mother didn’t do any of those things while pregnant will be the only gay one in the family. But she smoked tobacco, and cannabis while pregnant with my 3 younger siblings who are all straight as can be. But hey if one guy claims it why not believe, reminds me of all the back and forth on studies done on eggs and butter in relation to heart disease.

  • princston

    Last saturday I bought a great Honda NSX after earning $7311 this month and-in excess of, 10/k lass month . It’s by-far the most-rewarding I’ve had . I started this six months/ago and straight away started making over $80.. per-hour . you can find out more ??bs95.??m

  • EvonCook

    Actually this study rather dovetails with1960’s experiments with confined rodents which when the confined population grew to be oppressive and the stress levels consequently rose, offspring of both sexes were often or much more likely to be homosexual. I always knew we were an advanced evolutionary metamorphosis, but who knew we were a natural development for population control? I somehow remember however that the last two survivors were aggressive, cannibalistic females –anything but plump, stay-at-home lesbians.

  • masc4masc

    This article seems written in such an angry tone. Aren’t gays always trying to prove being “born this way”? Wouldn’t this be scientific proof of such if it’s true?

  • tada-no

    Dr. Dick Swaab should start a new campaign to encourage guys to get their dicks swaabed more often for gonorrhea!

Comments are closed.