Even More Funny, Freaky, Filthy M4M Craigslist Ads

Another week, another round of freaks and perverts posting M4M Craigslist ads. (We mean that in the nicest way possible, of course!) From guys with food fetishes to men looking to be used as human urinals, there’s no shortage of filth and kink happening on the world’s most popular free classifieds website.

Scroll down to read this week’s roundup. (Reader discretion advised!)

Title: Nylon Dress Socks

Ad: Hey guys, I’m looking to hook up with other masculine, in-shape guys who get off on nylon dress socks. Goldtoe are my favorite and I like ’em to be somewhat smelly.

Me: Six two, 190lbs., 46 y.o., size 13. Pics are of my feet.

If you’re into it, email me back –hopefully with a pic. Mention the word cotton, and you’re out! ;)

Title: Anyone want to chill, drink beer smoke ganja and fart on pillow

Ad: Who is down to come over and chill? I have plenty of beer and ganja. Fart on my pillow and see what happens from there

Title: Really wierd Kink. READ. I dont know why

Ad: I have this wierd fetish in which I would like to pay a guy to step on a piece of food and then make me eat it. I know it is weird. For some reason it gets me going. with shoes or barefeet whatver.

hit me up

Even if it just in a parking lot. I just like the food smashed.

Title: Pamper playtime

Ad: Love diapers and related play, from simple dress up fun to full on roleplay. Love to be the bottom or lil guy who’s too little to know any better. Also into mutual diaper play with other cute guys anywhere from 18-40. Daddy type guys also welcome.

LOTS and lots of fun gear to play with and in, hanging in Huggies, playing in panties, jerking in lil boy briefs & PJs; all sorts of fun pervy lil outfits and scenes. Can get into being a very dirty lil boy… maybe some humiliation, light spanking, enemas, verbal play, etc.

Safe only, condoms a must if we get to that. 5’11”, 150 lbs, brown hair, hazel eyes… cute. Pics are of me and recent. Prefer to host at my hotel but have a car as well. ;)

Title: Into men’s feet?

Ad: Into men’s feet?

Nice clean trimmed size 11’s here with aligned toes and soft soles.

They love attention. Massage, kiss, lick and suck my toes.

Hit me up if you can host locally.

Title: Doctor role play

Ad: Good-looking 40-year-old straight guy lean athletic runner 5’8″ tall Italian Irish. Looking for a good looking real doctor or someone who has access to a doctors office to do some doctor-patient role-play. Nothing too wild, just a fantasy for a long time and thought I’d throw it out there and see if it might actually work

Title: Lingerie Show Cock Tease

Ad: Wife is gone which means I’m wearing her underwear…again. Prancing around like a total slut modeling this and that. Anyone interested in a show? Would love to model it for you while I tease you.

Title: fuck you fake ass douchbags.

Ad: I’m so fucking sick and tiered of staying up late exchanging bullshit emails with robots and giving out my pics and info to thieves, collectors and spies.

If you feel the same way and your looking for a cool fit gl 30yo guy with a nice tool. Then let me know your real. By leaving some kind of tool like “hammer” for example. (But NOT that) in the subject line. One liners suck. And dont ask me for pics. I’ll exchange those later if theres mutual intetest and not via craigslist, to save us all time and effort.

My requirementz are you must be: 18 – 32yo. Std/hiv neg. Physically fit. That does not mean a perfect body. Just not obice. Oral. 420 and drink friendly.

Other attributes that are not required but appreciated are. Straight/ bi. Masc. Kinky. Uncut. 6″ or smaller. Swallows.

Title: Big, preg belly?

Ad: Love big, round ball bellies….

Anyone into the fantasy of pregnant dudes? Love pretending to be pregnant myself and also love to see that pregnant belly on another guy. Would love to chat about the fantasy and see where it goes…

Title: Short guy looking for very short, dwarf, little guy

Ad: Hey there,

SO, hope this does not sound too weird or un-politically correct, but I am 5’3″ on a good day and looking for shorter guys! The shorter, the better. Little person would be SO hot!

Kinda tired of being the small one all the time, but I am the nicest guy you will meet on here or anywhere. Very clean, excellent hygiene, semi hairy, single and horny all the time! I am 50, about 160, decent shape, small belly, muscular and not too bad overall!

Age is not a big deal for me, younger, older – all good. Just be a little dude, short and skinny, short and stocky, short and fat – all good.

Not necessarily for tonight but sometime soon would be awesome! I do have pics, and can share if we connect on here. Just be a cute hot little dude!

Title: Fantasy Role Play

Ad: Let the costumed NYPD officer show you the latest in Stop n Frisk

test your co-ordination with new field sobriety techniques

as well as check your blood alcohol level using the new sucking the tube instead of blowing into it

looking for in shape bad guys looking to have some creative fun

guys under 45 send your mug shot to see if you are on the wanted list

PS as expected cuffs and night stick are not part of this promotion

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  • Ben Dover

    I get a kick out of this feature, I guess partly out of relief (as in, I’m SO glad to be happily married now!).

    But a few of these are, if not quite *normal*, at least understandable. The short guys: that one makes sense. Short guys can be hot, and it must be tough for them.

    The feet: not uncommon from what I’ve heard and encountered, & a few guys wanted to do that with me (sorry, I didn’t get into it the one time).

    The cop & the doctor: not my thing either, but both must be pretty common gay male fetishes.

  • Desert Boy

    I totally get the cop (or football or baseball player) drag, but the others just gross me out. What whatever floats your boat.

  • Billy Budd

    The doctor fetish seemed quite normal to me. I would examine him all over.

  • Chris-MI

    Anyone who thinks these are kinky should check out their local m4w. This is exceptionally mild compared to say, a guy who wants a lactating woman to wear a cow costume. He’s a regular in my area.

    I’ve always assumed it’s because no actual women bother with Craigslist for their hookups and all that’s left after a few rounds are the genuinely delusional. Fetishes these may be, but at least these dudes have a real chance of meeting someone sympatico.

  • Bobby Christina Crawford

    NOT one of these is as weird as 5 Mormon’s in a room.

  • Tommysole

    If this is kinky, I a,m doing kinky wrong.
    Kinky to me = Spanking, flogging, piss, pits, REALLY SMELLY FEET, Forced feminization, blood and fire play, forced nudity in public, forced foot slavery oin public and the list goes on……………

  • DarkZephyr

    “Other attributes that are not required but appreciated are. Straight/ bi.”

    The “straight” part of this one caught my eye. What would a straight guy be doing seeking sex with a man?

  • Billy Budd

    @DarkZephyr: I once had sex with a guy who was much more straight than Bi. He was married, felt no attraction to the male form, was extremely masculine, had almost no experience with men, an did not reciprocate lot during our sex session (only I gave him a BJ, only I touched his dick, he did not touch mine and we did not kiss). He was only interested in penetrating me. He was obsessed with anal sex and had a premature ejaculation because he was so excited by the prospect of doing it. He told me his wife would never allow him to have anal sex with her.

    So, my conclusion is that there ARE indeed some straight men who have sex with guys. Perhaps they should be called bisexuals from a clinical, scientific point of view, but they do identify themselves as 100% STRAIGHT.

  • Billy Budd

    @DarkZephyr: Some callboys and gay-for-pay people are also an example of guys who identify themselves as straight but have sex with men.

    I will give you another example, of the opposite situation:

    I am definitely gay and I identify myself as gay. I feel attracted only to guys, cute and handsome guys. I am able to identify a beautiful woman, but I will not get an erection from seeing her naked.

    But I WOULD and COULD have sex with a woman if she paid me US$1,000,000 . I would just ask her to give me a very long BJ and touch me all over, and I would be able to get hard and do it. I would not like it much, but I would do it.

    Then I would be a gay guy who has sex with women. You see?

  • NateOcean

    Ah, the rich deep aromas of ganga-fart infused Egyptian cotton pillows. A place where you could bury your face as your drift off to sleep.

    Sounds like something Martha Stewart would come up with.

    “It’s a good thing.”™

  • litper

    @Billy Budd: stop your propaganda of heterosexuality; all these “straight” guys are closeted bisexuals

  • Billy Budd

    @litper: As I said (and you did not pay attention to it), these guys are technically bisexual, from a scientific point of view. But they do not identify as gay, many of them do not feel attracted to the male form, and most engage in gay sex for specific purposes, such as money. I call them straight for this reason.

  • litper

    @Billy Budd: they are technically and actually bisexual… many many men are bisexual but don’t want to admit it, they make up such lame excuses it’s beyond pathetic

  • BigJohnSF

    Funniest ad I ever saw on craigslist: “Vegan seeks other vegan for oral sex.”

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