28-year-old ex-ex-gay Seth Crocker believes he’s unearthed the secret to being gay and being a gay-hating Christian. The answer: celibacy.
In an interview with Mic.com, Crocker, a Clinical Psychology major at Regent University and former student of the now defunct Exodus International, says choosing abstinence is a “personal thing” rooted in his deeply-held belief that in order to have a genuine relationship with God one must make sacrifices.
Even really crappy sacrifices.
Like denying oneself true love, companionship and intimacy with other human beings.
“It’s about humility,” Crocker argues. “I feel like this is what God teaches in scripture,” before adding, “but I could be wrong.”
“At the same time,” he continues, “I understand how hard [celibacy] is—how it can feel isolating and lonely—and I can understand why someone would pursue a relationship with someone of the same sex—to have that love and companionship.”
It took some soul searching, but Crocker says he’s has managed to overcome those needs. He’s now an advocate for celibacy, saying it can be “liberating” to anyone struggling with same-sex attraction.
“I think it’s quite liberating when you can look past that to see what the Gospel is actually saying—that we’re called to be like Christ,” he says.
Jesus, Crocker continues, was a bachelor for his entire life. As far as we know, he never had sex or even fooled around with another person, male or female. And if he could do it, so can everyone else.
“It’s an amazing model of what we can do,” Crocker says. “It can be a really fulfilling life when we feel called to something outside of ourselves.”
He continues: “We tend to put too much focus on our relationships—all my identity, all my worth comes from this other person. Your life doesn’t begin when you’re in a relationship.”
Unless, of course, that “person” and that relationship is with God.