Comedian Jerrod Carmichael got very personal during last night’s premiere of the docu-series Home Videos on HBO.
In the episode, 31-year-old Carmichael returns home to North Carolina, where he sits down with his mother, Cynthia, for an intimate chat.
After talking to his mom about her husband’s repeated affairs, Carmichael asks if she’s ever found herself attracted to women.
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When she tells her son no, Carmichael reveals, “I’ve hooked up with dudes before.”
To which his mother casually replies, “Well, OK. That’s your option. I like men.”
The conversation ends there, and there is no further discussion about how exactly Carmichael labels his sexuality.
Still, Twitter has had a lot to say about the whole thing.
Prior to Home Videos, Carmichael created and starred in the sitcom The Carmichael Show, which aired for three seasons on NBC.
He has also filmed two stand-up specials, and appeared in a handful of blockbuster films, including 2014’s blockbuster hit Neighbors and its 2016 sequel as well as 2017’s Transformers: The Last Knight.
Watch the promos for Home Videos below.
draven
I like him. He’s a really nice guy. I liked his show on NBC but he seemed to give my gaydar a twirl. His mannerisms and just the way he carried his self made me think he might go to bat on my team. I hope he is on my team. He’s absolutely adorable.
MISTERJETT
i saw his tv show a few times. i did see some things about him that made me think “hmmm, maybe”.
Bytemenow
Yep. He did come out. He just did it in a casual “matter of fact” sort of way. Good for him. As a gay, black male myself, it’s nice to see other black, potentially gay males who can just be honest enough with themselves and those they love to be comfortable in their own skin and can share that part of their life with those around them.
ElPillo
Refreshing. Coming out needs to be made a non-issue, like saying “I like the color green,” and get no concern back. Over production to draw attention is bad karma.
“Do you eat oysters? Do you eat snails? My taste includes both snails and oysters..”
Donston
Well, I’m not really sure this counts as a “coming out”. If a famous woman simply said she’s hooked up with chicks a few times would people really consider that “coming out”? He didn’t say he “likes” guys, didn’t say he was attracted to guys, didn’t say he’s interested in dating guys or is in a relationship with a guy, didn’t embrace any identity, didn’t talk about where he is the romantic/sexual/affection/relationship spectrum. It’s less a “coming out” and more of an admittance of behaviors. And there are many people out there who are fine with guys who admit to being into dudes to some degree or admit to having some same-sex hook-ups, but they prefer for a guy to not embrace being seen as “gay” or a guy having unabashed same-sex preferences or unabashed same-sex relationships. That’s the difference between being homophobic and being anti-gay.
But for a black guy in the public eye just admitting some same-sex hook ups is a big deal, especially nowadays when an admittance like that will be plastered everywhere and you know follow up questions are going to be unrelenting.
TheMarc
I don’t get it. In the new “community,” I hear all about disregarding labels and certainly being not so quick to slap one on someone without their permission; but all I see from supposedly woke Twitter warriors is exactly the opposite. Maybe he’s gay, maybe he’s bi, or a bit curious. It doesn’t matter. The more important aspect of this is that he was honest. That he talked about his experience openly and honestly. The knee jerk reaction that accompanied his admission is one of the biggest deterrents for these discussions to take place meaningfully and frequently.
Donston
The “community” is divided. There are some people who place more weight on identity than ever and put staunch criteria on those identities. While there are some people who wish to be completely dismissive towards identity. Both things are probably too extreme. Ultimately, not being afraid to speak your truth and speak your struggles and unabashedly be with/love who you truly want to be with and love are most important. But we all know that the political, sociological, economical and ego attachments to identity, to admitted sexual behaviors, to people love lives aren’t really going anywhere. Especially not in the realm of social media.
TheMarc
@Donston. True. Particularly the obsession with someone’s sexuality via social media. I get it, to an extent. When I was growing up in the 80’s and 90’s; there really weren’t a lot of positive or, hell, just openly gay role models. So each and every coming out of a celebrity for my generation was extremely important and vital not just for gay visibility, but to show little boys and girls in small town America that gay people exist and you can indeed have a life. And that’s how I perceived it started. Now in an age where those who paved the way fostered an environment where it is not only OK to be gay; antiquated ideologies about sexuality and gender roles are falling away. But still there’s this schoolyard childishness where if someone kisses a guy once or has a very close friendship with a male friend, they’re automatically gay as judged, as you mentioned, by social media. I get that this is our modern reality; it’s just so frustrating that it is as such. As we grow, so should our attitudes and behavior.
Donston
I mean, the reality is that homophobia, internalized homophobia, gay shame, desperation to maintain a sense of hetero-normalcy, religious persecution, being ostracized by family- all these things are still very much things. And being out has consequences no matter what, especially if you are a public figure. So, it’s a complicated discussion. We need to get to a place of not forcing identities on people, not looking to out people, embracing the reality of the romantic/sexual/affection/relationship spectrum, supporting honesty without judgement, etc. while also still fighting the same ol’ battles that have hardly disappeared. It’s a balance we haven’t gotten to yet. And because identity, sexual behaviors and who date/love are all still so tied to sociology, politics, economics and ego it’s unlikely we’ll get to that place any time soon.
Donston
Also, people are always into other people’s business. And folks on social media and gossip sites always want to know who someone if dating. None of this will go away. That’s a part of human nature. So, if two famous guys seem “pretty close” then there will probably be some type of rumors. But there would be rumors between a man and woman as well. What you’re saying doesn’t really line up with what I’m saying. I’m not really concerned with silly gay rumors no matter how true or false they are. I’m talking about the general spectrum as well as internal, sociological and political struggles as far as identity, sense of self, self-comfort, self-truth and how you present yourself to the world go. I don’t care that much about “victimizing” straight/hetero-leaning dudes because of gay rumors. That ultimately doesn’t bear much of any career or social ramifications. You do need to stop blaming gay guys for all the mess on social media. Women (and a decent of straight men) are just as prone to speculate about famous people’s orientations and who they may be dating and give people identities.
TheMarc
So you point out that there are still significant ramifications for coming out and being perceived as “other,” gay, bi or other than straight and then say it doesn’t matter?? And as far as “blaming gay guys” for this, I’m unsure where specifically I outlined that gay men were SOLELY responsible for this type of behavior; but if I did, it was certainly unintentional and not all what I was saying. But regarding that point, in that we in the gay community experience discrimination related to our identity on a regular basis, we should be more responsible and mature in how we address stories of this nature. And truly, I wasn’t really trying to line up with what you’re saying, that’s why I said what I said.
Kangol2
He came out as a man who’s comfortable sharing with his mother that he sleeps with men. Gay, bi, queer, same-gender-loving, whatever the name he chooses, it was a beautiful moment, he shared his truth with the world, and he probably feels a lot more free. I always liked his show and his comedy sets, but this admission made me like him even more.
Donston
You’re kinda twisting his words like other people are. He may ultimately be heterosexual or may consider himself “straight” despite not being heterosexual. He said that he has hooked up with guys a few times. That could have been a long ass time ago. He may not be interested in “hooking up” with guys now or in the future. While I’m also fairly certain his mother was well aware of the information he gave him. He didn’t just drop a bomb on her on television.
It was a nice moment. But people do need to chill out. Every time someone mentions that they’ve had some sexual contact with the same gender or have some type of attractions to the same gender folks automatically assume that that person is not heterosexual or doesn’t see themselves as “straight”. Admitting to hooking up with your gender “a few times” is just admitting to hooking up with your gender. There are plenty of gay identifying men who have had a decent amount of sexual contact with females. There are plenty of gay identifying men who aren’t homosexual. On the same token, you can’t assume a dude is a part of “the club” because he admits to some same-sex hook ups. We do need to respect that experimentation is real, that no one should feel forced to embrace an identity they wish not to, and the romantic, sexual, affection, relationship contentment spectrum is extremely wide and diverse. While being “out” can be a long, and step-by-step process.
Kangol2
@Donston, I’m not “twisting his words.” You’re twisting his and mine. Whether he slept with guys 10 years ago (at 21) or now (at 31), he sleeps with men. I said nothing about him considering himself “straight” or part “the club,” etc.; that’s your terminology that you’re imputing to me.
Jerrod Carmichael also didn’t say “a few times.” He said: “I’ve hooked up with dudes before.” We don’t how many times, but he’s hooked up and slept with men, and it was a significant enough issue for him to share with his mother, just as he felt the need to discuss dating white women with his family.
As I wrote before you twisted my words, “Gay, bi, queer, same-gender-loving, whatever the name he chooses, it was a beautiful moment, he shared his truth with the world, and he probably feels a lot more free.” Whatever name he chooses or not, he has publicly admitted to his mother and the wider world that he’s “hooked up with dudes.” That’s cool, and matters.
Donston
“He sleeps with men” implies that he “sleeps with men” now.
Kangol2
@Doston, uh, he might. You should ask him.
CanadianGuy62
Honestly, “maybe, probably” has to be one of the stupidest expressions in current use (and there are dozens of stupid expressions out there).
What ever happened to “might have?”