Now that the APA has confirmed what we already knew to be true, that toxic masculinity is very real and very gross, it’s nice when the collective consciousness (or at the very least, the internet) recognizes positive examples of masculinity in action.
Cue Norweigan comedian Ørjan Burøe and his four-year-old son Dexter, who have lit up the internet with an improvised dance to “Let It Go” from Disney’s Frozen.
“This is what healthy masculinity looks like,” wrote one commenter on the now-viral video, which has been viewed an astounding 75 million times on Facebook at the time of this post.
Related: ‘When the Beat Drops’ creators on “sissy shaming” and why conformity is a “nasty” lie
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
“It’s important to teach children you can do whatever you want to do,” Burøe told CBS News. “It’s important to embarrass yourself and let go.”
Of course, the clip brought out the expected haters, but who has time for them when this father/son duo is getting is so right?
Hit play and let it go:
mom is gone, no stress?
Posted by Ørjan Burøe on Sunday, January 20, 2019
Ektoras
Why the hell my parents weren’t that cool when i was growing up?
Damn, i am jealous 🙁
Catholicslutbox
It’s this kind of toxic masculinity that makes me glad I’m fem.
To be fair, Norwegians* are in one of the world’s “happiest” and most liberal nations…
QueerTruth
What kind of toxic masculinity are you talking about????? Did you read the article.
prarie pup
I assume you’re attempting to be witty or ironic in your response; this video is the exact opposite of “toxic masculinity.”
Catholicslutbox
Attempting?
HereIAm
Although parents have rights to raise their kids as they see fit but I just can’t condone the way this father raises his son. I much prefer a society where a man acts like a man, thinks like a man, and dresses like a man. Is that too much to ask?
QueerTruth
Shut up. And go away.
Can someone report this troll?
domen8r
I think they (and the rest of the world) will be fine without what u might condone. I’ll take the freedom and joy of both of them over yr judgement till hell is FROZEN over. Let it go (yr backed up constipation, that is). Spew yr shite elsawhere.
jsmu
+HereIAm NEWS FLASH, drooling little moron: YOUR HATEFUL STUPIDITY and YOUR SEXIST HORSESHIT DO NOT DEFINE what a ‘man’ is. TOXIC AND CRETINOUS STEREOTYPES DO NOT DEFINE MASCULINITY. PERIOD. Got it, MORON? GOOD!
Ographer
HereIAm his parenting actually isn’t for you to condone or not. That’s a bit of an arrogant thought process to even entertain that idea. This father is very clearly acting like a man, thinking like a man and dressing like a man because he simply IS a man. This is clearly not the traditional masculine traits I think you are referring to but that’s the point of all of this. Men can and will be anything they choose and want to be, as will women, and it does NOT make them any less of a man. (or woman). And to answer your question yes, that is too much to ask. People should act, think and dress any way they desire. End of story.
HereIAm
Ographer, you just painted a dreadful dreadful picture of a society where men can be anything they want to be, including getting their nails polished and eyebrows plucked, wearing high heels, and acting like a sissy and losing their ability to defend themselves when provoked but instead crying wolf on being sexually harassed. It’s a shame that the society has become so decadent and devoid of any decency.
Onecaddy13
I think this is absolutely fantastic!!! I 100% agree with Ektoras. Soooooo, HereIAm, then you need to go. Strict upbringing?? My god, this is 2019, I guess you don’t like Halloween either.
Luna1979
HereIAm.. . How did you find yourself HERE exactly? On a gay site? And why do you stay? You can’t be stupid enough to think you will turn anyone straight, so it must be educational. Reading articles to help you come out. You’ll never get a nice guy acting like a jerk…
HereIAm
I am not going anywhere else. Just love to stay here to discredit bitter and intolerant people like you who think that anyone who disagrees with you is a troll.
jsmu
+HereIAm Imbecilic, sexist, benighted little TROLL that you are–for you to think you ‘discredit’ anyone but your own toxic little bitch self is laughable.
Tombear
Queens discussing politics while having diametrically opposing viewpoints equals “Revenge of the Politically Polar Opposing Queens, better then “Valley of the Dolls!”
Brian
Bigots are the real victims!!1
Tombear
Actually, in England they would call these men “Pantomime Dames”.
gymmuscleboy
To say that a father dressing his son up in a dress is “healthy masculinity” is like saying that skin lightening creams form part of “healthy ethnic identity”. The content of the video is not wrong but it is not masculine. When will the left stop attacking masculinity?
gymmuscleboy
And when the left is done defining masculinity in feminine terms, are they willing to tell us that healthy femininity is when women act like men? I don’t think so. What a double standard.
It goes without saying that a lot of us gays have issues with masculinity, but we must stop attacking what we fear, and just let it be. We must stop being taken for a ride by a feminism that has become extreme.
Kangol
So what is hopping in a tanning bed or lying out in the sun to darken pale skin? Is that “healthy ethnic identity”? Look in the mirror, and don’t look away. Masculinity is many different things, not the narrow, static identity you seem to think it is!
truthseeker
They always attack masculinity because they prefer people who are weak and will obey their demands. But when they are being attacked physically or are being robbed, that’s when they’ll cry out wondering where all the masculine men are to help defend them.
I wouldn’t say the dad in this video is the definition of “healthy masculinity” because I don’t even know what that means. According to the person coining that phrase, would a dad teaching his son to play catch, or do things men are traditionally know to do, be labeled as “unhealthy masculinity”?
There’s nothing wrong with teaching boys to be strong and tough but we see that idea being demonized by many as being “toxic” or “unhealthy” which goes back to what I said from the start.
gymmuscleboy
@truthseeker Yes. To expand upon your comment, I would say various groups get behind modern feminism for various reasons – that is why it has become so influential. For example, the reason why some gay men support feminism is that they would feel more included and normal within society if male culture was feminised.
gymmuscleboy
@Kangol I think you are a bit confused by my example. Nobody is actually talking about skin colour per se, but rather that being forced to deny your nature should not be labelled “healthy”.
Look in any dictionary and you will find a clear definition of masculinity. Dressing up your son in women’s clothing does NOT constitute masculinity, nor does any other ridiculous feminist revisionist notion. That is not to say it is wrong, but it is to say that it is not masculine.
Anyone who supports modern feminism would do well to consider the value of masculinity in society. Any tribe would fall apart if the men were feminised because the masculine functions (ie. hunting and gathering) would suffer, and the same concept applies to modern society. Because of feminists, modern society accepts the notion that femininity is better than masculinity and that masculinity is toxic and unnecessary. This is the product of a small number of cunning, unhappy, sexist women.
t
I am IN LOVE with this man!
inbama
Sadly, we have become so ideological that trolls seem to make more sense than we do.
No, the father is NOT modeling “masculinity.”
He is teaching the kid that men can have feminine interests, feelings and pursuits and THAT IS OK.
Billy Budd
This is totally normal. Straight guys horsing around and playing. Doesn’t mean the kid is gay.
MarathonBoy
fyi, most crossdressers are heterosexual and the large majority of gay boys/men will never cross-dress in their lifetimes. get over your internalized homophobia, which apparently links crossdressing with same-sex orientation.
jcoberkrom
I’ve got to brag about my Dad (and Mom too). In the late 50’s when I was 4, 5, 6. I had a male doll. I have no memories of my Dad hassling me over this.
He may not have been happy about it, but he let me be me.
Alas, I realized too late what he gave me.
Billy Budd
Male dolls, as long as they are “macho” looking (such as military, “Rambo”-like), are totally normal and very popular among boys here in Brazil.
Luna1979
Only thing I didn’t like was that the father said it was important to “embarrass yourself and let go”. Why would spending time with your son ever be embarrassing? Or wearing a dress? Or singing, dancing or anything else? Not sure which aspect he was speaking about, but I do think even breaking stereotypes involves believing them to some extent, or why bother to challenge them? Just made me think we have a long way to go in order to eradicate toxic masculinity.
MarathonBoy
lol. If that’s healthy masculinity, may all men eternally remain sick.
gymmuscleboy
@A.S.Merrimac He is probably referring to men who “act like men” as he said so in his own comment! Up until recently, it was perfectly acceptable for the vast majority of men to be more masculine than women. That was normal. Did you know that research consistently proves that the vast majority of males are naturally behaviourally different from females? To borrow a gay phrase, they are “born that way”. That is an uncomfortable fact for effeminate gay men to accept, I know.
If the “toxic masculinity” accusation was innocent, society would have moved on by now, but instead it is dragging out as a sustained erosion on the acceptability of masculinity itself. It is ironic that gay men would help a bunch of feminists eradicate masculinity from society, yet understandable that their own insecurity leads them to attack other men. If we don’t stop attacking mainstream society, we will have worse than Trump on our hands!
radiooutmike
@gymmuscleboy:
Where is the “sustained erosion” of masculinity? Where? Please show me? Is it the #MeToo movement? People actually trying to bring some sort of justice for people who sexually harass women (and men)? Is it all these women running for political offices and winning?
How has this sustained erosion affected you personally? Have you had to accept 30% less pay for your job recently? Have you been told to be more fun or less uptight at work?
gymmuscleboy
@radiooutmike This lack of perspective is at the heart of western social division today. For example, how would you feel about an article telling you that “healthy homosexuality” is to act like a heterosexual? What do you think masculine-identifying men (of which many gay men are not) think when they are told they have deliberately and maliciously prevented women from participating in filmmaking, engineering etc? I hear this very often when I turn on the radio in my car. And then men come online and see articles like this appear in their feed telling them that they are not acceptable to society unless they are effeminate.
Our media is constantly hosting feminist content (as they benefit from the outrage/reaction) to an extent that is far beyond bringing justice to abuse victims. Obviously it is perceived by the mainstream as an attack on their values. This article is typical of the constant chipping away at the acceptability of masculinity – redundant as it brings no justice for anyone.
We need perspective to appreciate that when our culture is already by far the most female-friendly this planet has ever seen, a yet further criticism of masculinity is now extreme and a step in the wrong direction. The best we can do is to appreciate both men and women and work together positively.
MarathonBoy
“you have to abandon any notion of what you think your child should be versus who they actually are.”
I am confident that who the son “actually is” is not a fictional princess from a movie. Parenting does NOT mean embracing every activity that your child loves. That’s the opposite of parenting. Parenting is sorting the good activities from the bad, and encouraging the former while discouraging or forbidding the latter.
Josh447
The whole masc fem thing seems to be a gay/male crossdresser issue, a microcosm within the human race. Hardly related to feminism among heteros. Two totally different unrelated segments of society.
gymmuscleboy
It depends who is advocating it. “Healthy/toxic masculinity”, which is what this article is about, are feminist phrases, which are primarily used to advance the feminist agenda.