In one of the bright spots of the new year, 2015, the HIV status of the guy you’re dying to get into bed matters less than ever. And if you play your sexual cards right, his status doesn’t really matter much at all.
Sure, you might prefer to segregate your men by HIV status. But if you’re engaged in casual sex or even active in the dating pool, making assumptions can be a fool’s errand. We’ll save you the lecture about the perils of labeling people and simply say this: the best laid plans often go astray, particularly when true love shows up.
Can you guess what HIV status really does matter? Yours. To stay negative, or keep your HIV virus to yourself, the power is in your hands.
Here are five reasons why his HIV status just isn’t the point anymore:
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
1. What you do in bed is up to you.
Until you know the guy, and we mean more than his sexual statistics and where he works out, you’re going to have to demonstrate to him what a creative lover you are without high risk sex. Use a condom for fucking or drive him over the edge with oral sex. As long as you stay in the safety lane, his HIV status is irrelevant. Once you know and trust each other more you can negotiate the best of the rest.
2. Someone may be taking PrEP.
Pre-exposure prophylaxis (taking a pill to prevent HIV infection) is fast becoming a game changer for gay men on the scene. There’s a growing pile of research to show that PrEP has an efficacy rate that rivals condoms, and can give you some peace of mind when his status is a question mark. Of course, there’s no rule keeping you from continuing to use condoms regardless.
3. He is positive and undetectable.
Another major development of the last year has been the growing research showing that someone living with HIV that maintains an undetectable viral load is not capable of transmitting the virus to their partners. Of course, you have to know him well enough to feel comfortable that he is taking his meds as prescribed. Until then, see Reason #1.
4. HIV isn’t the only game in town.
We take our eyes off the other balling bugs when we forget that HIV isn’t the only sexually transmitted disease. In fact, among the various ways you can get infections from boinking, HIV is relatively hard to transmit because it requires bodily fluids (blood, semen, or a mother’s breast milk) to enter your blood stream through an open wound or through mucus membrane (the booty canal).
That’s not the case for more common infections like gonorrhea, chlamydia and herpes, which you can catch through oral sex or simple contact with skin during an outbreak. With the staggeringly high rate of sexually transmitted diseases among gay men these days, don’t over-estimate your HIV risk and under-estimate the others.
5. When does his HIV status absolutely matter? When he isn’t dealing with it.
When you have the HIV chat with Mr. Very Soon and he admits his last HIV test was before the final season of True Blood, you may want to think twice. Our sexual health depends on our getting tested regularly and addressing the results.
Likewise, if he is HIV-positive but hasn’t sought treatment because he says he feels great or doesn’t believe in taking pills, we have a problem. There are amazing new treatments for HIV. If you do not take advantage of them you might as well be living in 1987. Ask anyone who made it out of that decade alive and they will tell you it was not pretty. Even someone who truly believes they are undetectable may not be at the moment, given normal fluctuations in viral load, drug regimen, and strength of his immune system.
Our strength as a community comes from celebrating our similarities, not the definitions that keep us apart. When it comes to HIV, those labels are beginning to fade. And that is something to be grateful for.
Large Marge
#2 is horrible advice. It encourages unprotected sex because you are on PREP. That was never the goal. This article is irresponsible.
#3 also encourages unprotected sex if he is undetectable… also irresponsible advice.
#4 is stupid. Hey, you’ll get some STD so why not make it HIV?
This article does more harm than good.
Always use condoms.
QJ201
@Large Marge: just wait until they get Herpes, have bloody or pus filled feces or are screaming in pain while urinating because they picked up some “curable” or “treatable” STD.
“you can trust me I”m neg” I did and wound up at the doctor with my c*ck on fire, never again if I can help it.
Wagner Wallace
I’ll just stick to what I’ve been doing – sleeping with people I actually know, avoiding sex with those who are HIV+, and always wear protection…
DTOM74
The reason one should always use protection in particular for HIV is because guys LIE. Doesn’t matter if you know them or not. One of my best friends trusted his boyfriend. Turned out his boyfriend had HIV and Hep B for almost a decade and knew it. My friend caught the Hep B which is far easier to catch than HIV. He went to the hospital because he got very ill. The docs misdiagnosed him with a gallbladder issue and scheduled surgery immediately for removal. Two day later my friend went in for the surgery, the docs redid some testing – was Hep B. Almost had an organ taken out for no reason.
Also, a good percentage of guys don’t even know their status. So always play safe.
With that said, a few questions I would like to know the real answers to…
1. What’s the risk of someone catching HIV or Hep B from only precum during oral sex?
2. What’s the likely hood of a total top catching HIV via unprotected anal sex?
TrueWords
What’s the likely hood of a total top catching HIV via unprotected anal sex?
The risk of getting HIV varies widely depending on the type of exposure. Some exposures, such as exposure to HIV during a blood transfusion, carry a much higher risk of transmission than other exposures, such as oral sex. For some exposures, risk of transmission, while biologically plausible, is so low that it is not possible to provide a precise number.
Different factors can increase or decrease transmission risk. For example, taking antiretroviral therapy (i.e., medicines for HIV infection) can reduce the risk of an HIV-infected person transmitting the infection to another by as much as 96%1, and consistent use of condoms reduces the risk of getting or transmitting HIV by about 80%2. Using both condoms and antiretroviral therapy reduces the risk of HIV acquisition from sexual exposure by 99.2%3. Conversely, having a sexually transmitted infection or a high level of HIV virus in the blood (which happens in early and late-stage infection) may increase transmission risk.
The table contained in the link lists the risk of transmission per 10,000 exposures for various types of exposures.
http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/policies/law/risk.html
TrueWords
What’s the risk of someone catching HIV or Hep B from only precum during oral sex?
How is Hepatitis B passed on?
The virus is usually in:
* blood
* semen (cum)
* pre-semen (pre-cum)
The Hepatitis B virus is 50-100 times more infectious than HIV, so it’s much easier to get or pass on through sexual activity. It can be passed on through unprotected:
* Anal sex: topping or bottoming
* Oral sex: sucking or being sucked
* Rimming (Oral-anal sex)
* Birth to an infected mother
* Contact with blood or open sores of an infected person
* Needle sticks or sharp instrument exposures
* Injection drug use that involves sharing needles, syringes, or drug-preparation equipment.
*Sharing items such as razors or toothbrushes with an infected person (they could have infected blood on them)
How is Hepatitis B prevented?
You can protect yourself by getting vaccinated. The risk might be reduced by using condoms for anal sex (topping or bottoming) and oral sex (sucking or being sucked).
Vaccination
If you are a gay man, it is highly advised to get vaccinated because government guidelines state gay men are at risk and should be vaccinated. The vaccinations are given as two or three injections over six months. You only get full protection if you have all the injections. A blood test after the last injection shows if the vaccine has worked, which it does for about 95% of people. After five years, you’ll need a booster injection.
TrueWords
Gay men have learned the correct and proper lingo/words to convince others and themselves that they are “disease free” and/or undetectable.
You do not know if the person has been true to their medications either HIV meds or PREP meds to justify unprotected sex…so YEAH wear a condom…
Remember DO NOT impair your mental state with drugs (also drugs can significantly weaken HIV medications effectiveness) because regret is a horrible feeling, DO get tested for ALL diseases (regularly at lease 2 times a year) as well as vaccinated for Hepatitis A and B, remember that condoms are an excellent measure of protection for casual encounters.
aliengod
This article is very irresponsible. Bad reporting, Queerty!
joey
@DTOM74: hep b is much much easier than hiv to catch…i was diagnosed with hep b about 2 yrs ago. the docs noticed slighly higher liver numbers, at first thought it was a fatty liver, my numbers were not that high at all, then they jumped, docs retested and now i am on a med (tenofovir)probably for the rest of my life. i am very lucky, no liver damage everything is good with me, the hep b can barely be seen according to my doc. i had the vaccine before i came out or had gay sex, the docs say it does not work for everyone whch was a big surprise to me – so take note, booster shots are a good convo to have with the doc. i ALWAYS played safe, NEVER EVER BB’D.. EVER NOT EVEN ONCE in my life and now this! the irony is the med im on, tenofovir, is considered prep as it is the same ingredient in truvada (look up “cdc bangkok study”) reguardless i have not had sex for over 2 years now, i dont know if i ever will again, i had a great sex life (obviously i got hep b) this has shook me up and terrified me so much i dont know when i’ll ever have sex again. it sucks but the idea of going through an hiv test or being so preoccupied about safty while i’m having sex- that i couldn’t enjoy the sex – is just too much for me to deal with but i have no one to blame but myself. this article is terrible..
vive
@DTOM74: “1. What’s the risk of someone catching HIV or Hep B from only precum during oral sex?”
Negligible.
“2. What’s the likely hood of a total top catching HIV via unprotected anal sex?”
For the top the risk of transmission is about 1 in 1,000 exposures – i.e., quite low but not negligible. For the bottom it is between 1 in a 100 to 300 exposures based on different estimates. In other words, still quite low. This is important to know – I think many guys slip up once or twice and then either fall into crippling anxiety and depression or assume they must be infected so they think they might as well stop taking precautions, whereas it is much more likely that they are still uninfected.
It is also important to know that PEP (post-exposure prophylaxis, started within 72 hours) after an exposure reduces the above risks to about 1 in 100,000 for the top and 1 in 10,000-30,000 for the bottom.
Merv
Anal sex is high risk with or without a condom. Condoms break or slip off all the time.
lauraspencer
#1 The article says what you do in bed is up to you. My first boyfriend was HIV+ and due to it I was very careful. There were things that were off limits and then that was a deal breaker for him. So I was happy to be with him with limits that would protect me, but he wasn’t interested. Being HIV+ he wanted to act like everything was the same. It wasn’t.
#4 says “HIV is relatively hard to transmit.” I have heard this before, but if it is so hard to transmit then why do millions of people have it???? Are they working hard at contracting it????
We all select who we are attracted to based on criteria. Some guys don’t want to date short men. Some guys don’t like bald men. Choosing not to date someone who is HIV+ makes more sense than not wanting to date someone based on height or hair. It’s based on health….your own.
DTOM74
@vive: Thanks for the ratios but can you clarify them? Meaning, are those ratios based on random hook ups, hence most will not be exposed to HIV+? Or are those transmission ratios based on every sexual encounter of someone with HIV+? If the later, I thought those ratios would be much smaller particularly for the bottom.
1898
It’s nice to take a break from the gossip and post something serious every once in a while, but sadly this article is full of contradictions and and conflicting advice.
First you suggest that any activity other than BB is “in the safety lane” and thus perfectly fine. Then, correctly, you discuss the risks of contracting other STIs from these “safety lane” activities. So are these activities safe or not?
A friend of mine got anal warts from one of those “safety lane” activities. Had to have them surgically removed. Said it was the most painful thing he’s ever experienced. And now they’re coming back, so he has to go through it again.
notubutme
The status is not the issue ,,for me at least.. my 1s relationship of 5yrs was with a gr8+Man…and that was 20some yrs ago..now I question how one gets infected. With my Ex in the Early 80’s it was lack of information, Addiction, and recklessness. We Have a lot of info on Prevention now ,, the other 2 behavior patterns do come into play into a relationship….that is what I Question !
dhmonarch89
HORRIBLE HORRIBLE HORRIBLE ARTICLE!!!!
DTOM74
@joey: Sorry to hear about your story. Sounds like you have chronic Hep B while my friend caught acute which he is now cured of after 6 months of treatment.
Hep B can be caught through many different means via the blood even kissing somone with an open mouth wound so there is a very good chance your infection was not because of anal sex.
notubutme
@dhmonarch89: I will Agree. Its Almost like its Preaching to be Promiscuous and unsafe. The Article could have been better was on Personal stories and preventive measures..
Desert Boy
HIV is a manageable disease, as long as you’re adherent and take your meds.
However, to suggest an undetectable viral load renders a man unable to transmit the HIV virus to a sexual partner is shockingly irresponsible and dangerous to post.
Here is three sources to refute Queerty on the topic.
http://www.hiv.va.gov/patient/faqs/transmission-of-undetectable-virus.asp
http://www.healthline.com/health/hiv-aids/undetectable-viral-load-transmission-risk#ViralLoadandHIVTransmission5
http://www.aidsmap.com/No-one-with-an-undetectable-viral-load-gay-or-heterosexual-transmits-HIV-in-first-two-years-of-PARTNER-study/page/2832748/
DTOM74
@lauraspencer: Millions of people have it worldwide which in the context of things, is miniscule to the world population. Someone might correct me here but I believe that most HIV infections are in Africa mainly due to unprotected sex and lack of education. Here in the U.S., there are about 1.2 million infections of which 1 of 7 people are unaware with about 30K to 50K ew infections per year depending on the source. Many of those HIV infections are not from sex much less gay sex. I live in DE which has among the highest infection rate per population. One would think it’s because of all the gay sex in Rehoboth Beach. Nope, it turns out most infections are coming from the Wilmington area due to drug use. HIV from what I have read is among the least catchable STDs (might part be due to the fact that there are less infections) but that is not to take such any less serious than the others.
Bromancer7
My goodness, so much pearl-clutching! Why do these stories always bring out the puritan parade?
lauraspencer
Thank you DTOM74 for your comment 🙂
I live in NYC and seeing the number of guys who are HIV+ on dating/hook up sites, at bars and the gym or who I know through work makes me realize that it isn’t difficult to contract. Just in my own little world I know plenty of HIV+ men and I don’t do drugs, practice unsafe sex etc. So based on my personal sampling it seems like a lot of men have something that is “hard” to get.
TrueWords
@Desert Boy: I agree with the statistics that you site in a controlled situation but here in another one that is VITALLY IMPORTANT…
Less than one-third of people living with HIV in the U.S. are on antiretroviral therapy (ART) with full viral suppression, which is key to good health and reduced risk of transmission, according to the latest CDC Vital Signs report. In 2011, out of an estimated 1.2 million people living with HIV, just 4 in 10 were receiving HIV medical care and only 3 in 10 had undetectable viral load. “The bottom line is HIV care and treatment not only work to improve health and prolong lives, but also prevent transmission,” said CDC director Tom Frieden. “You can save your life and save the life of someone else.”
http://www.hivandhepatitis.com/hiv-aids/hiv-aids-topics/hiv-treatment/621-cascade-of-care-cascade-of-care/4958-only-30-of-people-with-hiv-in-us-have-undetectable-viral-load
Gay men have learned the correct and proper lingo/words to convince others and themselves that they are “disease free” and/or undetectable.
DTOM74
@lauraspencer: Correct, being in a major city such as NYC will definitely give a person a misguided perception of reality nationwide. I’m sure most “gay” infections do occur in major cities but I do think it’s a positive step in the right direction that more gay men can be honest and open about their status as you are seeing. I remember reading an HIV study over a year ago that might irk some people but this is what it found and NYC I believe was among the 4 major cites involved in the random HIV testing. I might be off by a point or so but whites had an infection rate of 9%, hispanics 24% and blacks 33%. The study blamed a lack of education for the high black infection rate. Not sure I’m buying that completely especially if in the city with so much HIV awareness…
1898
@Bromancer7: Yes, suggesting that people be aware of the correct facts, and suggesting that incorrect information might be harmful, is soooooo puritanical.
Desert Boy
@TrueWords: It’s so troubling to me that in the USA, we still have HIV adults who don’t start therapy. This is the difference between life and death.
Cam
Off topic, but……
Does Queerty notice, you’ve put up multiple articles with the headline pic of shirtless guys, and yet the only ones that have gotten any number of comments either have to do with an AIDS topic, Politics, or homophobia.
Maybe a few less Bieber posts and a few more about the world around us would up the click numbers.
vive
@DTOM74: “Thanks for the ratios but can you clarify them? Meaning, are those ratios based on random hook ups, hence most will not be exposed to HIV+? Or are those transmission ratios based on every sexual encounter of someone with HIV+?”
Those ratios are per exposure to someone who is HIV+. In other words, a top having unprotected sex with an HIV+ bottom has a risk of about 1 in 1,000 of catching HIV. A bottom gaving unprotected sex with an HIV+ top has a risk of about 1 in 100 to 300 of catching HIV.
I believe (but am not sure) these statistics were calculated before HAART became a thing. In other words, with an “undetectable” partner nowadays the risks would presumably be lower than that. However, it bears remembering that only about a third of HIV+ individuals are on the appropriate HAART to make their virus undetectable.
Black Pegasus
@Cam: Those are my observations as well. Countless vapid articles posted here daily with no shortage of shirtless white men. This website has gone through many cycles over the years, but lately, I don’t feel like I’ll be missing anything if I skip coming to this site for several days at a time.
Random
If you only have sex with guys who *believe* they are negative, you’ve already filtered to include the highest risk group in the pool of people you have sex with.
Why is this? Because 8/10 guys get HIV from someone who didn’t know they had HIV.
Ironically, the most effective way to use disclosure to reduce your chance of getting HIV as a negative guy would probably be filtering out other ‘negative’ guys and only having sex with guys who are undetectable; which is pretty much the opposite of how most guys use disclosure.
Random
@Cam: Good point. Trivial entertainment stories can be found on countless sites across the internet. I feel that Queerty often underestimates the intelligence of its readers with the endless fluffy articles. I don’t see why there can’t be more pieces about things that genuinely impact on the lives of gay men to provoke thought and discussion.
martinbakman
….said no rational gay man ever.
Random
@martinbakman: That’s because a lot of the time when it comes to HIV, what gay men *think* of as being ‘rational’, isn’t always as sensible and safe as they’d like to believe.
Cagnazzo82
I may be a gambling man, but even I’m not that crazy.
Merci mais non merci.
Bromancer7
@1898: It is when all people have to say is “oh this article is horrible” or “you’re a whore if you don’t wear a condom” or “don’t believe any of the statistics, let me tell you my purely anecdotal evidence and take it as fact”.
Fit-N-Lean
Assume everyone is HIV positive and protect yourself at all times. It’s your life – be in control of it. If you don’t, no one else will. Play smart.
timmm55
ACON (from Australia) has a better “5”
There are now at least five strategies that reasonably constitute‘safe sex’,provided that certain
parameters are met. They are:
1.The use of Condoms during casual encounters between men of unknown or discordant serostatus.
2.HIV negative men taking effective pre
-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP).
3.Men living with HIV who only have sex without condoms when they have a sustained undetectable viral load (UVL) and in the absence
of sexually transmissible infections (STIs).
4.Effective use of serosorting between HIV positive men.
5.Effective negotiated safety agreements.
Australia now has the best cascade (63% fully HIV suppressed on ART), and the most up to date HIV plan in the world.
For all the people who say use “protection” and only mean condoms, you need to know it’s limitations also. I’m not dismissing condoms (see #1) but ART is actually more effective when fully suppressed.
Consistent condom use in anal sex stops 70% of HIV infections, study finds
http://www.aidsmap.com/Consistent-condom-use-in-anal-sex-stops-70-of-HIV-infections-study-finds/page/2586976/
(In the HPTN 052 study) “…the single transmission in the immediate treatment arm of the study occurred shortly after the positive partner had been started on therapy, at a time when the viral load could not yet have been suppressed. Therefore, while the bottom line of the study was that ART reduced the risk of transmission by 96%, having an undetectable viral load appears to have been 100% effective. The authors of the study (I was one of them) couldn’t state this explicitly, because the goal of the study was to look at the effect of ART, not the effect of complete virologic suppression. But it is clearly not true to say that the risk of transmission with an undetectable viral load is 4%
I would add that these results are entirely consistent with the large European PARTNER cohort, where so far they have seen no transmissions among gay and straight discordant couples who do not use condoms.”
http://hivforum.tumblr.com/page/2
Wilberforce
What a surprise. It’s the ‘let’s ignore HIV’ meme. That was the ghetto’s first response back in ’81. Now it’s being retried.
At least now there are people in the community to challenge it. Thanks everyone for the tough words.
Random
@Wilberforce: Are you sure you’re reading the same article as that’s not how I interpreted it at all?
TrueWords
BELOW IS A LINK FOR FREE and/or LOW INCOME HEALTH CLINICS in each state.
Many of theses clinics offer free testing for sexually transmitted diseases to help curb the on going rise of them, while the others charge you based on your income. They also give out thousands of condoms for free in all shapes and sizes.
http://yourstdhelp.com/free_clinic_locator.html
YOUR KNOWLEDGE IS THE ULTIMATE POWER
timmm55
@lauraspencer:
The flip side is a lot of POZ/undetectable gay men only date the same. After all the years of ‘slut shaming” and stigma, why would we want to date someone negative? Even now with data from the Partners Study, The Swiss Statement and HPTN 052 were are still held up to hatred and mockery by self-proclaimed “Negative” Gay men, ESPECIALLY Gay men.
I say, Fine. Swim in your own pool of Negative Men. 80% of new infections are from so called “NEG” men.
Franklin
What wrong with not wanting to date someone who has HIV? I mean everyone has their preference, and you can’t help what you like. Should people be forced to date someone they are not interested?
1898
@Franklin: No, you shouldn’t be forced, and no one IS forcing you… but people who actively avoid openly-poz guys (as a way to remain neg) are not doing themselves any favors. The ones who don’t know their status, haven’t been tested in a long time, appear to be “clean,” pressure you into BB under the guise of “it’s fine, don’t worry, I’m not a slut,” etc., are the ones you should really be concerned about.
Random
@Franklin: The article makes no reference to ‘forcing people to date someone who has HIV’ and I don’t see anyone in the comments suggesting that either. But do be aware that a large number of people acquire HIV in relationships from people who don’t even know they are infected. This is why, which is what 1898 is also saying, that screening out people who have been diagnosed with HIV is not a reliable way to remain negative.
Michael
@Desert Boy: You do realize that your last URL was the very study that Queerty was reporting on in March of 2014 that led to the claim that undetectable men do not transmit HIV. (The 4th paragraph says: When asked what the study tells us about the chance of someone with an undetectable viral load transmitting HIV, presenter Alison Rodger said: “Our best estimate is it’s zero.”)
The “not capable of transmitting” link in the article above goes to the same study and it cannot both support and refute such a claim.
Michael
To me, the PrEP-basher’s position is dated, hypocritical and illogical.
We are now several years into the needed studies and the evidence is rapidly mounting that ART/PrEP is at least as effective at stopping the spread of HIV as condoms. So logically we should use both. But no, that’s not their message. Their message is that using only condoms is OK but using only ART/PrEP is reckless and irresponsible. So they promote one known-to-be-less-than-perfect approach over another that seems to be at least as effective for no discernible reason.
And let’s skip the “condoms stop other STIs too” distraction. Practically all of the non-HIV STIs couldn’t care less which hole a penis goes into so unless you are using condoms during oral sex too (and who really does that?) then you’ve already made your peace with those risks.
And finally, to all the judgmental, PrEP-bashing, snot-nosed 20-somthings who did not live through this epidemic from the beginning, I have the following comment: I can assure you that if PrEP had been developed in 1987 it would have been heralded as nothing short of a miracle and anyone bashing its use for any reason, with or without condoms, would have been laughed out of the room. To anyone paying attention your shrill, sex-negative puritanism sounds just as idiotic today as it would have then. If that’s the best you have to offer then please just STFU.
timmm55
@Michael:
As I noted above “(In the HPTN 052 study) “…the single transmission in the immediate treatment arm of the study occurred shortly after the positive partner had been started on therapy, at a time when the viral load could not yet have been suppressed. Therefore, while the bottom line of the study was that ART reduced the risk of transmission by 96%, having an undetectable viral load appears to have been 100% effective.”
In other words, NOT A SINGLE CASE of HIV transmission from an undetectable (fully suppressed) has occurred from any of the studies. Not Partners, Not HPTN 052, Not the Swiss, ….NONE. I will predict the Australian “opposites Attract” study will be the same. Also remember by definition some of these studies were <200 copies, not the current <20.
barkomatic
For crying out loud, this piece doesn’t suggest you have bareback sex with an HIV positive guy without protection. It’s merely pointing out that with medications and/or condom use that you don’t have to exclude HIV positive guys from the dating pool.
VicIsMe85
This article is disgusting and promotes irresponsible behavior.
Stache99
Ha. Did some of you actually bother to read the article before sharing your opinions. Yes. A title used to rile up some people up. I thought it was very balanced and true. No where does this article imply irresponsibility.
I swear to god for some of you it will always have to be something to bitch about and finger point to make you feel better about yourselves.
Random
The advent of PrEP is interesting regarding the response of those who are HIV negative as it means they have another method of maintaining their status. So, more than ever, it places the spotlight on them and I think that has a lot to do with their discomfort, as they’d much rather rely on people with HIV identifying themselves so they can exclude them and then, basically, hope for the best – with or without condoms or knowledge of actual status.
Well, sorry guys, but the jig is up. Stop looking at positive guys as people you can demonise and blame as you now have another method that studies have shown is even more effective in preventing HIV than condoms – that’s one more than I had when I became infected.
joey
@Random: i kinda agree with you random..now the other guy has some responsibility to go a bit further to protect themself..although i’m on a prep i still cant fuck anymore..i’m sure you know the feelings having gone through some of these feelings after your diagnosis too
Random
@VicIsMe85: If that’s what you really think, then you’ve completely misunderstood what the article is saying.
jason smeds
AIDS is caused by the very poor lifestyle you find on the gay scene. Constant drugs, alcohol, partying, promiscuity, sleaze…all these things combined will cause your immune system to decline. You see it all the time in people with no HIV in their body. You do NOT need to have HIV in your body to suffer a sustained decline in your immune system.
The reason there was an outbreak of AIDS in the early 80’s was because it was the culmination of the factors I’ve just mentioned. The recently created gay scene concentrated all the factors into small spaces, leading to the loss of herd immunity. Once you lose herd immunity, things spread. Concentration was the key.
HIV by itself won’t kill you but if you combine it with the factors I’ve mentioned, your health will deteriorate substantially.
xcnickcb
Clearly someone did NO research and this needs to be REMOVED for miss information. An undetectable person can still transmit. It is less likely but they can. Undetectable just means they dropped below a level of being tested for it. There is always a risk for it, no matter if you are on prEP (truvada).
Cam
@jason smeds:
And what a shock, Jason (Or his other screename BJ) never passes up an opportunity. When he isn’t defending an anti-gay bigot, he attacks the gay community.
At least you’re a consistent troll.
Stache99
@joey: Yup. Two things sexually active gay men should do. 1. Get vaccinated for Hepatitis. Very easy to do. 2. Get on PrEP. Especially, if you’re not the most responsible at times.
joey
@Stache99: i agree…but remember it doesnt work for everyone…i’m one of those guys…and i was ALWAYS responsible..never ever bb’d not even once…but shit can still happen
Stache99
@joey: Wow. You got a double whammy. Not only did the prevention vaccine not work but after you got sick it should’ve went into remission. Your immune system obviously works differently then most. Sucks the way you had to find out. You definitely got the short end of the stick on that.
I have hep b too. That was 20 years ago except mine went into remission knock on wood.
joey
@Stache99: i could have had it prior to my getting the vaccine, i am old enough that it didnt exist when i was young i got it right after i came out around age 40, although i played only a bit i could have got it then. i am fortunate it was caught in time with no liver damage at all…just this pill everyday now. but it just scared the fuck out of me now i am terrified of getting something else..
DTOM74
@vive: Wow, those ratios do indicate it’s hard to catch HIV. And to me would indicate with the use of being consistent with condoms, a person’s chance of being infected is almost zero. While we are on the subject of prEP, does anyone know the cost of such drug and does insurance companies cover?
courthousedoc
@xcnickcb: You obviously can’t read the scientific studies. In the link about the Partner’s study, the researcher said “When asked what the study tells us about the chance of someone with an undetectable viral load transmitting HIV, presenter Alison Rodger said: “Our best estimate is it’s zero.”
What part of zero don’t you understand?
Random
@xcnickcb: But the point is, the risk when someone is undetectable is comparable to the risk of someone acquiring it due to condom failure. It’s unlikely that you’d get HIV when using a condom, but they’re not perfect.
jason smeds
I am very pro-homosexual but I want homosexuals to invade the mainstream. Get out of your bars and clubs and go into the mainstream. That is what true coming out is, and not this current segregated enclave masquerading as liberation.
A lot of you don’t realize that the gay scene is what made gay men more likely to become ill. As I said in my above post, concentration is the key to AIDS. Once you start concentrating behaviour (sex, promiscuity, drug use, poor diets), it becomes a cascade. You lose herd immunity.
Franklin
@1898: I know, I was just stirring the pot to prove a point. It seems to me like the same the same misguided reasons I repeatedly see people defend so vigorously for not wanting to go out with someone on the basis of other qualities such as age or race, could applied to poz guys and sound just as rediculous. I am in total agreement, that if you are taking all the necessary precautions (condoms and PREP) there is no reason why you can’t have a relationship with a poz guy. Also, I definitely think it’s stupid to believe someone is negative just because they say they are negative. Sadly, I’ve heard poz guys on blogs like this talk about their apprehension about telling someone they are interested in that they are poz. I know it sucks to have someone make judgements about you based on a quality that does not define who you are.
mcdfishfilla
Is this article for real? Only an idiot would write something as stupid as this and even a bigger idiot to express these views publicly. Unreal and insane.
Random
@Blackceo: If using a ‘broad brush’ approach means to screen out guys who are positive and undetectable, then that could well prove to be counter-productive, since most people are infected by guys who don’t know they have HIV.
This is something that gay men really need to understand – not to not ‘be a jerk or insensitive’, but because you’re actually doing the opposite of what you’re trying to achieve and placing yourself at more, rather than less, risk.
Geeker
People who bareback in this day and age PrEP or not are honestly too stupid to live.
OrwellIsDead
The author of this article (Mark S King) writes here a warning not to underestimate STIs other than HIV. Yet, on his blog just a couple of days ago he wrote that “Syphilis, chlamydia, and gonorrhea are all easily treated and cured. The very idea of getting The Clap again just makes me feel nostalgic.” (http://marksking.com/my-fabulous-disease/gonorrhea-nostalgia/). Which of these two viewpoints – published in the same week by the same person – are we supposed to go with here?
money718
You people are idiots. Just b/c queerty puts out an article, you take it as gospel? Are there men on here or boys? Grow the F up. Wow.
If people want to use Prep b/c they like to bareback, then so be it. As long as you are not having sex with them, why do you care?
money718
@jason smeds: Why are you spreading lies? Seriously dude.
Cam
@jason smeds: said…
“I am very pro-homosexual but I want homosexuals to invade the mainstream. Get out of your bars and clubs and go into the mainstream. That is what true coming out is, and not this current segregated enclave masquerading as liberation.”
______________________________
Only a right wing troll, or a log cabin self hating fool would be here parroting a description of the gay community that sounds like it came out of 1975….oh wait, I forgot who I was talking to.
retaliashun
@Large Marge: Yes, please keep telling everyone to skip everything else that has been shown to reduce transmission, since condoms completely stopped the spread of HIV since the 80s.
You’re the irresponsible one.
Jacob23
It’s sickening to read garbage like this – health advice from a dude who puts sexual pleasure above human health and writes that he is nostalgic for syphilis. /smh/
But it is good to know that this sort of commentary is the dying gasp (pardon the expression) of a subset of gay men – maybe 10-15% and falling fast – who warped their sexual lives into something devastatingly unhealthy. No one in the entire world, other than commercial sex workers, lives like these men. And no one gets diseased to the extent they do either. No, not even in the birthplace of HIV, amid war and severe poverty, are the prevalence rates as high as they are among educated, affluent gay men San Francisco – the Mark King subset. Even now, these deluded men look around for more quick fixes and workarounds so they can keep the assembly line of anonymous sex partners moving along without feeling “stigma”.
If only they had learned moderation, self-respect, and the importance of linking the sex act with love and kindness and connection. Not because some invisible sky god says so or because of some book of fables, but because this approach, flexibly implemented, is conducive to happiness and health, not disease and misery. It could have stopped this epidemic before it started, and ended as well epidemics of other STIs, depression, anxiety, loneliness, and substance abuse. One day in the future, the Mark King generation will be scrutinized and written about and judged for how they treated themselves and others. It won’t be pretty.
Jacob23
@Jason Smeds: I have no idea whether “herd immunity” plays any role here. You’d need to elaborate on it some more. However, I do know that gay/bi male health outcomes are far worse in major gay enclaves (SF’s Castro, NYC’s Chelsea, West Hollywood, etc) than they are among gay/bi men living throughout the US. A gay man in Manhattan, Kansas is far more likely to be in good health than one in Chelsea in Manhattan, NYC. Considering that homophobia and social isolation are detrimental to health, we would expect that the gay stuck in KS would fare worse. But the Mark Kings and Vives and Stache99s of the world have engineered an urban subculture so alienating, so soul-destroying, so predatory, and so selfish, that it not only matches the deleterious health impact of homophobia and social isolation, but it greatly exceeds it.
The really great news is that there are empirical data – not anecdotes but real data – showing that what you call “the gay scene” is not “the scene” for most gays any longer, and in fact, it is steadily receding into history. It is the end of an entrenched subcultural phenomenon, and as such, it won’t abruptly end in a few months or a few years, but it will continue to contract as it has been for several decades. The rate of contraction accelerates as it shrinks.
money718
@Jacob23: Jacob…really?
Clark35
@Fit-N-Lean: True.
@Jacob23: Well said.
This article is irresponsible of queerty to run since younger LGBT people are going to read this and have unprotected sex thinking that HIV, or HIV status doesn’t matter or that it or other STDs won’t happen to the…like they’re already doing.
buffnightwing
Like Peter Staley said, the “STIGMA” from our own community is HORRIBLE these days.
I am HIV positive, and thank god I have a boyfriend and supportive partner. Gay boyz these days are just a sad mean nasty lot. Mean and nasty to each other.
you guys make MEAN GIRLS look like a cupcake party!!!!!!
My advice is to get tested every three months if you have more than two partners or more in one year.
buffnightwing
@Clark35: You’re an idiot. Im pretty sure no one under the age of 30 reads this HORRIBLE WEBSITE.
These guys are having unsafe sex because they didn’t get any sex education during the BUSH years. SIXTY percent of the country is now run by republicans. Do you think there will be MORE SEX ED? NO.
buffnightwing
@Jacob23: Do you listen to yourself. WHAT? are you talking about?? You are psycho
buffnightwing
I love the guys on barebackrt.com that say they are NEGATIVE and want bareback sex with other NEGATIVE guys only. ROFL
OrwellIsDead
I love how buffnight wing says he’s appalled by how mean and nasty gay men are to each other before immediately making three more comments where he calls one commenter an “idiot”, one a “psycho” and then a whole bunch of negative guys on barebackrt.com irresponsible liars.
Stache99
@Jacob23: @Clark35: You can pretend to be separate people but we both know you’re one in the same.
I love the fact that you’ve included me in the list with Mark King though. An activist who’s actually done allot to help people instead of another nasty anonymous troll such as yourself who only likes to attack people.
Random
I’m honestly not getting some of the hysterical over-reactions here. The writer isn’t advocating anything dangerous or risky and even when he talks about PrEP he makes a point of saying ‘Of course, there’s no rule keeping you from continuing to use condoms regardless.’
So, really, what’s the problem?
Stache99
@buffnightwing: Yeah, you really have to have a sense of humor and take this site with a grain of salt. Then again if I wanted to troll I’ve probably call it heaven.
jason smeds
Barebacking is much safer if you do it with a man you pick up on the straight scene. Such men have herd immunity – i.e. immunity gained from not confining themselves to a relatively small and concentrated social and sexual scene, such as the gay scene.
When you confine your social and sexual activities to a relatively small and concentrated scene such as the gay scene, you are mixing with repeat offenders. They come back week after week to the same gay clubs where your chances of picking up an STD are much greater following an encounter with a random individual from this bunch.
It is the greatest of ironies that the scene that was created to liberate us – i.e. the gay scene – is now our worst enemy.
buffnightwing
@jason smeds: I actually think you are psychotic. If you aren’t on medications for mental illness I suggest you get on them soon. Bipolar maybe? You sound it.
my ex was bipolar.
LOL
So do you bareback in the straight scene? just wondering ROFL
buffnightwing
@Stache99: I know. It’s so funny. I went to school for cosmetology, and the girls there were nicer than these a holes online here at queerty. the editors obviously love it because we spend all this time on the site, making the advertisers think we are reading stories, when in fact we are commenting about idiots. ROFL
buffnightwing
I think all HIV negative guys on Queerty are JERKS. LOSERS
Negative guys these days are like a Republican best friend.
ROFL
buffnightwing
@OrwellIsDead: I love how you are an IDIOT also.
I am allowed to defend myself, and call people idiots when they say idiotic things.
You must be one of the a_holes i was talking about i guess.
buffnightwing
@OrwellIsDead: Negative guys on barebackrt.com is an OXYMORON you JERK.
If you are on barebackrt.com and you say you are negative and you only will have sex with other negative guys , BAREBACK? then you are a REAL IDIOT, JERK AND LOSER.
OrwellIsDead
I didn’t say you weren’t able to call people names. Go right ahead and do that. It just doesn’t make a lot of sense to do that when you claim first off that you’re disappointed in the fact that people call each other names.
buffnightwing
@Clark35: If you think queerty is responsible, then you are an IDIOT too.
have you been to the porno sites??? lol
unless a guy chums in another guys but, then its not considered hot anymore.
this article doesn’t make anyone have unsafe sex.
get with the program you JERK
Random
@jason smeds: That really is some flawed thinking. You have no idea who else the guys you meet on the straight scene are barebacking with. They could quite easily be having sex in parks and/or public toilets, or randoms off the internet, all of which are also used by scene gays.
NSB2244
What a bunch of crock..it is shit like this that deludes people into thinking that they can no longer get an STD or worse..if you don’t know it already..men lie..not all but unless you are the worlds greatest lie detector, you don’t know and if you are willing to risk your life, then you deserve what you get…just because there is a cure for something, it is not a reason not to protect yourself against it.
Blackceo
Well people can do what they want but if I was having casual sex I’d be wearing a condom all the time. Saying u r undetectable doesn’t mean shit to me if I can’t see receipts. Unless you were my partner and I knew u stayed on top of your health and meds all that language is for your own self.
And of course there is such a focus on Prep and Truvada so that yay we can bareback the eye is taken off all the other nasty ass incurable STIs out there. Oh and taking precautions about my own health and using a broad brush doesn’t make any of us jerks or insensitive, but at the end of the day I really don’t guve a damn if that is how it comes off. When it comes to my health, someone elses feelings don’t matter.
onthemark
Some of the “negative” guys in this thread (if they don’t test poz next week) are obviously so stupid, there’s hardly any hope they will remain negative.
barkomatic
It seems like some guys just can’t be happy unless they state how subhuman everyone else is compared to themselves.
vive
@Blackceo, about that brush. Most HIV infections (between 60% and 70 AFAICR) are caught from boyfriends, and the majority of those boyfriends who transmit HIV think they are negative.
vive
And that goes for you too Jacob23. The big HIV problem is not where you think it is.
Blackceo
@vive:
Right…which is why going bareback has been a point of contention between my fiance and I cuz I’m under the “if I can’t watch your ass 24/7” school of thought than I’m putting my health in your hands hoping that you aren’t creeping outside the relationship.
My friend is undetectable and does stay on top of his meds but was telling me about some hookup his little fast ass was having the other night when he was topping and said ewww the guy didn’t clean well enough. I asked if he was using a condom and he said no and I had no fucks to give because he chose not to wear a condom and I told him as much.
Random
@Blackceo: What does your friend’s hook up experience have to do with this discussion?
Blackceo
@Random:
Does my previous comment say @vive or @Random ???
Random
@Blackceo: No, but having read all the comments, I couldn’t see why you think it’s a relevant point.
NYCJD
What a completely IRRESPONSIBLE position to take. Of course it still matters…people are on a total binge of self denial about PreP. You can’t believe what the pharmaceutical company who produces ( and wants to SELL the stuff) is saying about efficacy. They quote in-lab studies and distort reality. Do you own research and the information is easily obtained about GENERAL POPULATION studies which show a MUCH lower efficacy of the drug when you factor in how sloppy most people are about taking a pill EVERY SINGLE DAY, without fail. Doesn’t happen. So you end up with a REAL efficacy ranging from 65% to 78% depending on the report you read. That means YEAH, it really DOES matter how much risk you are taking with that guy you are barebacking with ! Larry Kramer is probably spitting nails if he is reading this article…and if he isn’t now, he will be soon. Beacause I am forwarding this to him now. Shame on you !
theszak
The Strategy BEFORE sex get tested TOGETHER for A VARIETY OF STIs then make an INFORMED decision, google… tested together before
vive
@Blackceo: “…going bareback has been a point of contention between my fiance and I cuz I’m under the “if I can’t watch your ass 24/7? school of thought…”
I know what you mean, but I can’t imagine what the use would be of marrying someone I felt that distrustful towards.
Blackceo
@vive:
And that has been his argument. “You don’t trust me completely and I would never do that to you” At the end of the day its my issue and I acknowledge that. But I know several people who were told the same thing and low and behold they ended up in some drama. I just don’t think most men can remain monogamous and so I have even told him that if he creeps he better wrap it up cuz if he brings me back anything I will cut it off.
And that is his @Random: Because it was in the context of him being “undetectable” and taking Prep as an excuse to have bareback sex. So again, all this focus on HIV and forgetting about all the other STI’s u can contract via barebacking. If he would just use condoms like I told his ass to do he wouldn’t need to worry about some other guy’s shit being on his unwrapped dick.
Random
@NYCJD: In the process of getting yourself worked up into a state of hysteria, you seem to have overlooked a key point the author made about PrEP which is ”… there’s no rule keeping you from continuing to use condoms regardless.”
oldbrit
If you care for your health or that of your partner, run as fast you can from the advice in this article.
Safe sex is really only safer sex. Drugs, viral loads, etc. are only pacifiers that will lull you into a false sense of security.
Read the side-effects of Pre-exposure prophylaxis. Personally, it doesn’t sound very healthy to me: http://www.truvada.com/truvada-side-effects.
With all of the STI’s/STD’s out there today, more than ever before, sex is something best shared only with those you know very well and have known for a significant period of time.
rodmx26
I’m HIV+. I’m on meds since 2012, currently undetectable. I don’t like this idea of PreP. Its a big issue when the meds don’t work. My first HAART included Truvada and that was useless for me ’cause I did get the virus from a person who was taking Truvada and then abandoned the treatment. His virus mutated and became resistent to Truvada. So PreP is not a panacea. I usually tell everyone of my status. Because there’s still a minimal risk of transmision, I always use condom with negative people. I’m doing bareack only with HIV+, undetectable and STD-free guys.
Random
@Blackceo:
So was the guy he was with infected with something because that’s not how it came across in the way you recounted the anecdote?
And remember, if you’re having any type of sex, you’re putting yourself at risk of non-HIV STIs. Until the 80s, gay men never used condoms and they got STIs, and then as safer sex took off and condom use became widespread, they still get these infections. HIV aside, condoms only offer limited protection.
theszak
The correct term is always… safer
There’s no zero risk.
Random
@rodmx26: The most recent research show from 2014 states:
”Treatment with pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP) does not involve a significant risk of HIV drug resistance should seroconversion occur, results from the iPrEx study published in the online edition of the Journal of Infectious Diseases demonstrate”
Random
@rodmx26: Also, how do you know that the guys you have sex with are ‘STD-free’?
rodmx26
@Random:
There is always the possibility of developing resistance to any drug.
If someone is doing PrEP and they are already VIH+ or they become HIV+, they can develop resistance. The most important: if they fuck with someone who took Truvada and then left the treatment, PrEP will be useless for them.
Also: this is not a “day after” pill as many guys think. In theory, doing PrEP is taking one pill everyday like any HIV+ person.
Austin77
For some providers, continuing on PrEP requires testing every 3 months not just for HIV (both Western Blot and rt-PCR), kidney function, and bone mineral density (all of that recommended by the CDC) but also for all the other major STDs (Hep A/B/C, Gonorrhea, Syphilis, and Chlamydia), including swabs (oral and anal).
Which would mean that those patients are probably some of the least risk out there, just because they’re keeping on top of it. I doubt most gay men get regularly tested for more than HIV.
Austin77
@rodmx26:
“Also: this is not a “day after” pill as many guys think. In theory, doing PrEP is taking one pill everyday like any HIV+ person.”
Not just in theory: one pill, every day and at roughly the same time every day (I believe the standard is within 2 hours of the same time).
There’s also some indication that PrEP helps against HBV, but every gay man should be immunized against that anyway.
WillC
This is one fantastic article!
No surprise by the misinformation that people written about in the above statements. I spent years of my life in medical school, research and watching people die: All while working towards a cure for HIV. PrEP is Proactive, condoms break, nobody shoud have to live with HIV if a pill may help curb transmission. Condomless sex was statistically increasingly common in all communities prior to PrEP…
The rants of the ill informed –> It reminds me of all the people who “cherry pick” out of the Old Testament. Ignorance is an awful sickness. A great example: http://youtu.be/jYaewOBGybw.
lauraspencer
Why is it so difficult to wear a condom?
Do we really think that if it was so difficult all these years to use condoms that they will use Prep correctly? If guys can’t put on a condom when they have sex do we really think they will remember to pop a pill every day?
Why would guys spend money on Prep and not on condoms which are cheaper? And why would perfectly healthy guys want to pollute their bodies with strong meds when they could easily use a condom?
edwardnvirginia
ISN’T IT OBVIOUS …
that Queerty is owned and/or managed in whole or part by
1. gay-hating conservatives
that Queerty is owned and/or managed in whole or in part by
2. capitalist oligarchs who benefit from selfish and predatory sexuality and their conditions and consequences almost all of which involve pharmaceutical sales
that Queerty is owned and/or managed in whole or in part by
3. self-serving liars
ISN’T THIS OBVIOUS? AND IF QUEERTY WISHES TO DISPROVE THE OBVIOUS QUEERTY CAN PUBLISH A FULL DETAILED ACCOUNTING OF WHERE THEIR REVENUES COME FROM AND WHO BENEFITS FINANCIALLY FROM QUEERTY’S ACTIVITIES.
edwardnvirginia
ISN’T IT OBVIOUS …
Geeker
What worries me is that there was a time before AIDS and all this barebacking makes me wonder how long it will be before we’re looking back fondly on the time before something even worse.
bizcochito
Question–> me and my partner have been together for several years
He is hiv poistive at undetectable levels for more than 10 years
We take care of each other and so far i haven’t got infected
Next step ( and looking in the long term when we get old ) is looking for an medical insurance company in the U.S. That can protect him even if he has hiv ( as I mentioned before he is been undetectable and have medical proof of this )
If anyone has some info i will really appreciate to share it with us….
Thanx
TO
Queerty Team I’m glad this article was posted as the back and forth in the comments is good for people to understand different viewpoints around PrEP. I also have feel you “may” have strategically chosen this article title to rile people up and cause a stir. Regardless, good job, it worked. I’m never going to judge someone if they want to go on prep or not nor do I think that everyone on here is “slut shaming” certain men that choose to go on PrEP or are positive. But no matter what, having lots of sex with lots of different partners right now is high risk with our without PrEP. Their are strains of Gonorrhea that the CDC and hospitals around the country are seeing that are resistant the strongest antibiotics (not a new story) and let’s not forget about the HPV virus which is directly linked to rectal / anal cancer in men (not a new story or a question anymore). The fact of the matter remains that if you are going to be promiscuous, wear a condom, it is way safer. Lastly, shout out to the folks who have mentioned Meningitis vaccinations as crucial.
vive
@rodmx26, you bring up a valid point, namely whether Truvada as PrEP is protective against Truvada-resistant HIV strains.
I don’t know if the answer is known, but remember that preventing a new infection is different from treating an established infection. This difference is seen in the fact that Truvada alone is NOT effective at treating established infections (you need at least a third drug added to it) yet it has been very effective in preventing new infections.
vive
@TO, also, HPV vaccination is very important especially for gay men. Yet you never see any articles about this in the gay press. I don’t understand why.
Jacob23
Vive-
The problem is exactly where I think it is, and that doesn’t come from any personal bias, but from the medical literature. HIV infection is directly and overwhelmingly correlated with greater number of partners and a lack of personal connection with those partners – because those 2 factors result in a much greater frequency of UAI with an HIV+ partner. If we had created a gay community early on in which sex was linked to relationships and connection, the overall number of sexual partners would have decreased, communication would have increased, and STI infections would have been far more rare. As a result, the pool of infection – the prevalence of STIs within our population would have been low, meaning that occasional excess would be much less likely to result in infection.
Now whether HIV transmission occurs among “boyfriends” (as you frame the question) is medically irrelevant. That label is so imprecise as to have no meaning in this context, which is why it is not used in the literature. It is the substance of the relationship that matters, not the label you affix to it. The mentality of the participants (protective or not), the properties of the relationship (long-term and committed vs. short-term and open), and the behavior of the participants (e.g., monogamous vs. non-monogamous) determine the infection risk. Also, obviously relevant is the HIV status of the participants at the beginning of the relationship.
If you have “boyfriends” whose status you don’t know, who hook up with other guys, who stay in a relationship with you for a few months at a time, about whom you care very little, and with whom you use no protection, then yeah, you are at severe risk, and the fact that you refer to these guys as “boyfriends” won’t reduce that risk. If OTOH, you are in a committed, monogamous, loving and long-term relationship with an uninfected partner – even if some of those relationships fail and you end up having several over your lifetime – it is extremely likely that you will remain part of the 88% of gay and bi men who do not get infected. Your health outcomes unrelated to STIs will dramatically improve. And you’ll be a lot happier to boot.
Blackceo
@lauraspencer:
Thank u. That’s what I’m talking about. I’ll be damned if I shove some pill down my mouth when condoms have been doing me just fine all these years. But thats me.
@Random:
I don’t know if the guy has anything and neither does my friend since it was a Grindr hookup but my point is don’t complain about shit on your condomless dick if u have bareback sex and now u worried about hepatitis and whatever else is transmitted possibly through feces.
remyfacade
@barkomatic: Thank you so much you just saved me from writing. The problem is people only read what they want to see.
Blackceo
@Jacob23:
Thank u for that. That does make sense. I admit I’m no expert and welcome to be corrected if I’m stating anything that is medically inaccurate as opposed to someone who just doesn’t agree with a differing viewpoint.
Clark35
@buffnightwing: No they’re having unsafe sex because they choose to, not because of politicians.
You never know who is reading this site.
McShane
@jason smeds: I am really, really beginning to dislike you. I just hope that you are as intolerable in real life as you come across in the comments that you leave on this site.
Just the other day you said you would suck the d!ck of that crazy gross, attempted rapist Uber driver, but only if he had a big d!ck. I also remember you saying you wanted some older gentleman to, “sit on my face so I can eat his swamp hole.” But now you are schooling us on what nasty degenerates we all are. Guess what Jason, I think that you are some sort of mentally unstable bedridden sex offender. I am absolutely serious.
iamonpozvibrations
I have lived with HIV for longer than I have lived without it. I am 45 work it out! The hypocrisy of the gay scene screams loader than any queen. Drugs, alcohol, cigarettes all kill yet are embraced and treasured by the gay scene. Stop telling me what sort of sex to have its a drum that’s been beaten to death not me! I, as an adult will have the sort of sex I want with the guys who want the same type of sex I want. Many sites are out there to cater to our sexual wants, bareback sites, dating sites, safer only sites, its amazing how busy the bareback sites are. Its equally amazing how few profiles are on HIV+ dating and support sites. One of our largest Man hunting sites allows profile holders to list Safer only. Yet when safer only man comes over he does not bring condoms instead cigarettes and illegal drugs to offer. “Safer only” is not often the main motivator of “safer only man”. Rejection due to my HIV status has and sham-ably to the gay scene will always be there, yet I avoid it by using a Poz site and have amazing connected sex with guys both neg and Poz knowing we both met on a site that has left the naysayer’s and the sky is falling inners to babble on with their hypocrisy. I have moved on, iamon pozvibrations (so are a heap of open minded REAL NEG guys) The drug taking cigarette smoking HIV petrified boozer queens can gaggle on, on the others sites and leave me to LIVE!
All the best.
Regards
iamonpozvibrations
spiffy
If people really want the idea that “his HIV status doesn’t matter any more” to be true, how about give no anal sex a try? We seem to have this notion that unless someone is penetrated then it’s not real sex; but I seem to remember reading several surveys over the years, that there are plenty of gay men who don’t practice anal sex at all.
All these heated discussions about condom use, BB and transmissions, are really centering around penetrative anal sex.
Remember the safer sex eds of olden days? Frottage, mutual J/O, etc.? There can be plenty of hot, intimate connections two men can have with each other without worrying about STIs and such.
Take anal sex out of the equation, then it would become more realistic to think that one’s status matters less.
Random
@spiffy: Actually, that’s a good point. When I was regularly going out and meeting guys in the 90s and early 2000s, the issue of anal sex actually very rarely arose in the context of a one night stand. My experience has been that the more time I’ve spent on online hook-up sites, the more guys seem to be fixated on penetrative sex and the whole top/bottom thing, and I often think ‘Hey! Hold your horses! Let’s see if we if fancy each other before making an agreement about what we’ll do in bed!’
I guess the online world has created a sort of culture where everything has to be ‘on-demand’ rather than just going with the flow and seeing what happens.
Random
@rodmx26:
There is always the possibility of developing resistance to any drug.
Lots of things *might* happen. Whether they actually *do* happen, is quite another thing. True ‘resistance’ to ‘any drug’, where the immune system makes antibodies that negate the effects of the medication, is actually very rare.
Can you show me the study which shows ‘if they fuck with someone who took Truvada and then left the treatment, PrEP will be useless for them.’?
But in any case, if someone does become positive and has to take HIV drugs, as you are aware, there are non-Truvada regimes that work equally as well to suppress the virus to undetectable levels; being resistant to Truvada is not a life or death issue.
It’s also worth re-stating that the latest study shows that Truvada can help to reduce HIV transmission even if taken on demand, rather than every day. It doesn’t appear to be as effective if administered in that way but it will still help to cut the number of infections.
erik-in-mich
The only true way to never get any STD’s is not ever have sex. You know why people don’t advocate complete lifelong abstinence? Because 99% of people would never ever do it. (well not do it) The point is if every man used condoms reliably and correctly we wouldn’t be seeing the transmission numbers we do now, which means its a thing that guys don’t want to do. Someone found that taking a hiv med helped lower transmission, someone else found out having a undetectable viral load helps too. I would think this would be tools to help guide people to make better choices. If you choice is for Positive isn’t a bad word for bad people. Bareback isn’t either. Honesty, communication and the removal of stigma would be key. You do what you want to who you trust and I will do the same, ok ?
rodmx26
@Random:
“Can you show me the study which shows ‘if they fuck with someone who took Truvada and then left the treatment, PrEP will be useless for them.’?”
Well. That was my case. My first HAART was Truvada + Efavirenz (Atripla). After starting the therapy, my viral load spiked to 2.6 million per mililiter. What happened? A resistance test showed my HIV strain was already Truvada-resistant I was put on Atripla without a resistance test (yep, that sucks) because thats the most common HAART and just 4% of the people is already Atripla-resistant (at least in this part of the world)
This happened because I did get the virus from someone who was also taking Atripla and left the treatment. That was the answer from 3 different doctors. You can’t leave your antiretroviral therapy even for few days. Inadequate adherence = drug-resistat HIV strains. Because this dude was already Atripla-resistant, my strain was also Atripla-resistant.
Random
@rodmx26: Actually, there was a study called FOTO which showed that people could take weekend breaks from their treatment and they would still remain virally suppressed, so it’s not necessarily the case to say that you can’t leave your treatment ‘even for a few days’.
Also, given that Truvada is widely used in ARV therapy it seems extremely implausible that the drug companies would advocate its use as prevention, if it was then going to render it useless as a drug for treatment. That isn’t to say that there won’t be any cases of resistance but their modelling is likely to show that it remains at roughly the same level as it at the moment or, at worst, only marginally higher. As I posted above, the research to date has shown that PrEP ‘does not involve a significant risk of HIV drug resistance should seroconversion occur…’
vive
@Jacob23: “If you are in a committed, monogamous, loving and long-term relationship with an uninfected partner […] Your health outcomes unrelated to STIs will dramatically improve. And you’ll be a lot happier to boot.”
It’s a problem to me when people want to prescribe to other people what they should do to make themselves happy. There are a lot of depressive people in otherwise quite functional long term relationships. And there are a lot of very happy people who sleep around a lot – and who stay healthy thanks to PrEP and other measures. I am one of them.
Dan
This is a HORRIBLE “advice” article.
theszak
What other home test kits are available for other STIs?… besides HIV.
vive
@rodmx26: “@Random: “Can you show me the study which shows ‘if they fuck with someone who took Truvada and then left the treatment, PrEP will be useless for them.’?” Well. That was my case. My first HAART was Truvada + Efavirenz…”
You are comparing apples to oranges, though. Your case had nothing to do with PrEP (preventing a new infection) but rather with attempting to treat an established infection that was resistant to Truvada. It is still possible that Truvada could prevent initial infection even with strains that would be resistant once they become established. After all, there is NO established HIV infection that can be treated with Truvada alone, yet despite this Truvada is very effective at preventing initial infections.
onthemark
@vive: I suspect that Jacob23’s definition of “happiness” is feeling as smugly, obnoxiously superior as possible to the vast majority of other gay men.
Cam
@jason smeds: said….”Barebacking is much safer if you do it with a man you pick up on the straight scene. Such men have herd immunity – i.e. immunity gained from not confining themselves to a relatively small and concentrated social and sexual scene, such as the gay scene.”
———-
And once again Jason (Or his other screename) never pass up an opportunity to defend, the closet.
Maude
Is there such a thing as a “carrier” who is immune himself, but can transmit Hep-B to others?
I knew someone in NYC who had sex with at least two that I know of who later had the Hep-B…..and those two didn’t know each other.
And I always suspected he may have spread it to others because he was an insatiable bottom before AIDS.
He moved to San Francisco, contacted AIDS within 6 months, and eventually died.
Before He died he visited NY but I avoided him by visiting friends in Knoxville, Tn.
Maude
Forgot to click, “Notify me………” under my previous post, so I’m doing it here in hope of receiving an answer to my question….Can a carrier transmit Hep-B and be immune to it himself?
joey
@vive: as i previously mentioned i have chronic hep b, i am in excellent health. the doc tells me he can barely see any virus in me, but its still there. i can still give it to someone if we are not careful. hep b is the most prevelant virus in the world in asia it is endemic in most countries there. over 350 MILLION people have this. my pill , tenofovir, also affords me PREP protection (cdc “bangkok study”) should i decide to ever have sex. yes there is a vaccine but ITS NOT 100% effective. this pill can be very very effective in some cases you can actually ‘clear’ seroconvert although it is rare.
vive
@Maude, Hep B is not uncommon among gay men, so it is quite likely just coincidence. Most people who get Hep B clear the virus quickly and are then immune and non-infectious. Some patients, however, are unable to clear the virus and become chronic Hep B sufferers. Untreated, they can transmit the virus, yes, though nowadays chronic hep B can be treated.
Anyway, nowadays every gay man should be vaccinated against Hep B, which would make the question moot.
There is nothing wrong with being an “insatiable bottom.” Let’s stop bottom-shaming.
Why would you avoid a dying friend?
vive
@Maude, No, a carrier of Hep B cannot be immune to it himself.
xcnickcb
@courthousedoc: What part of it is NOT 0 do you not understand? 100%-96% equals what??? 4%. There is still a risk! Every credible research says condoms with truvada has a 96 to 98 success rate. When writing an article using scientific facts, you should look at many sources.
TommyRocket
@Wagner Wallace:
I still can’t believe that in this day and age anyone thinks that “not having sex with HIV+ guys” is going to somehow keep you safe. Safe sex is safe. And men lie. And not everyone who has HIV even knows they have it, which is the point of the article: someone with HIV who is taking proper care of themselves is a safer bet than someone who hasn’t been tested in 6 months. Ignorance abounds.
TommyRocket
@Large Marge: Talk about projecting. You do realize that the article encourages use of condoms and states merely that research and PrEP are giving us less reason to be paranoid ignoramuses and more reason to trust that you can keep yourself safe: with condoms and PrEP. As for the STD thing, this essay also clearly states that there are other diseases which are easier to catch than HIV, so it’s a warning to take better care by adding focus to those other STDs. Nowhere does it encourage unsafe play. But obviously that’s what you’re reading into it, so you must desire to play unsafely.
theszak
The correct word is always… safer
There’s never zero risk.
John
Who writes this stuff for this online mag? In the past month of so I have seen so much drivel that does more of a disservice to our community than anything.
I have a 22 year old nephew just learning the roads and he reads irresponsible crap like this.
I keep preaching condoms, condoms, condoms!!! I do not care if he tells you he is negative, undetectable or any other BS. I do not care if he is on PrEP or PeP. The same studies that say PrEP is good, in many cases don’t tell you the long term affects of it to ones liver. Do you really think all people read all of the info to know that it is not like a daily multi-vitamin to be used daily for life? Also, this a fairly new drug so do we know the effects 5-10-20 years down the road of this product.
Assume all are positive and wrap it up…if not for HIV but for syphilis, gonorrhea or hell who knows even dick rot (this one is made up). It does matter.
Stache99
@John: I can see that you’re a true reading comprehension genius but I’ll break it down for you anyways.
Use a condom for fucking or drive him over the edge with oral sex.
Even someone who truly believes they are undetectable may not be at the moment
HIV isn’t the only game in town.
Where’s the “drivel that does more of a disservice to our community” part that you see?
Bauhaus
HIV matters. What a dumb thing to proffer that it doesn’t.
DonW
@lauraspencer: “You can’t trust guys to take a pill every day if they won’t use condoms” is a phony argument. It’s actually quite easy to develop the habit of popping a pill every day — I take my PrEP when I brush my teeth in the morning, and never miss a dose. No one is tipsy, it’s not a moment of passion, there’s no risk of a less pleasure or fear of disappointing a partner — all factors that play a role in whether people use condoms consistently or not.
theszak
By Carey Goldberg
Why You Should Assume Everyone Has Herpes
http://commonhealth.wbur.org/2011/04/latest-genital-herpes
BenDover
Well this article is pretty disgusting. You almost think the writer has HIV and wants everyone to have it. Too much sociopathy and mental illness in “gay” man. This article is just repugnant. Irresponsible is an understatement, writer is a psychopath… and that’s dangerous to the rest of us. ALL of us.
vive
@BenDover, did you actually read further than the headline? He isn’t saying anything new or controversial, just repeating the same safe sex message as always. HIV status hasn’t mattered for decades as long as you use protection, which you should do anyway since you have to assume everyone is positive anyway, no matter what they may tell you. This is the same advice that has been around since the 80s, except that now there are some additional protection options in addition to condoms.
Stache99
@BenDover: or maybe you just need to go troll somewhere else asswhipe.
BenDover
@vive: More then 22 percent of sexually active faggots 16-26 have AIDS/HIV princess. THERE IS A PROBLEM IN “GAY”… AND IT CONTINUES WITH YOU.
BenDover
@TommyRocket: Maybe faggots just need to stop being sociopathic, promiscuous, deviant freaks.
iamonpozvibrations
Oh dear heavens to Betsy!
If your HIV+ and wish to move on from the “dummy falling out of the pram” Google pozvibrations
Regards
iamonpozvibrations
Realityis
First off, I think “My Fabulous Disease Guy” still has it all wrong. Stop working for the makers of Truvada and start lobbying for a cure.
Secondly, all of this in-fighting between our kind, on the subject of PREP, is getting boring and tiresome. Unfortunately, I find myself thinking about the day when HIV – people will start exhibiting unwanted symptoms due to the Truvada they are taking whether it be body fat abnormalities or rises in cholesterol, blood pressure, or triglycerides that can help lead to heard disease and stroke. Then what? Will they lie down and accept it as part of their decision to make the pharmaceutical companies richer. I don’t want to hear anything about how Truvada hasn’t caused symptoms in the last so many years. That doesn’t make it safe. What about 20 years from now.
Why are we not fighting for a cure for HIV and these horrible side effects. Some of us have to live with these life altering side effects for the rest of our lives, but no one wants to acknowledge us because we are “that reminder” that no one wants to see or think about. The younger generation is becoming complacent because they have this miracle drug to take. What a sad turn of events. I miss the activism of the 80’s and 90’s. NYC was so much more fun back then.
I don’t care how you have sex or if you want to take a pill every day, but I do care about finding a cure so I can stop the constant thinking about this disease that I do every day.
And to WillC who made the comment earlier, assuming you are a doctor, sure you are advocating for Truvada, you get 4x’s the amount of money that patient of yours would normally bring in with a once a year physical.
theszak
Compare the diligence needed for these protocols with The Strategy BEFORE sex getting tested TOGETHER for A VARIETY OF STIs then making an INFORMED decision, google… tested together before
Bully2
@DTOM74: While I can’t answer your question about the risk ratios for catching HEP B in various ways, I can offer this suggestion that I think all sexually active gay men should take to heart, and I’m actually surprised your doctor wouldn’t have suggested it unless you’re not out to him/her. That is:
1. There is vaccine for Hepatitis B.
2. There is ALSO a vaccine for Hepatitis A.
In a post Obamacare world, MOST health plans (just double check to be sure) will cover both immunizations. Also, if you normally have a deductible or copayment, if you just go in for the immunizations, Obamacare rules for MOST plans would require that any immunizations that are appropriate for your age and/or risk factors be covered at 100%, not subject to the deductible or copay or coinsurance. I said “MOST” plans because some plans, if they haven’t changed their plan significantly since Obamacare took full effect on 1/1/2014, may still be “grandfathered” and may not have to follow all the laws until they change their plan. Your carrier can tell you very easily.
Also, you’re question about PrEP. PrEP is an acronym, something like Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis – don’t quote me on that. It is NOT the name of a medication. The actual name of the medication is Truvada, which is an FDA approved, brand name drug, which is also given to patients who are HIV positive for treatment.
Therefore, it IS covered by nearly all health insurance carriers, the only question is how much you would actually pay under your plan. The drug itself costs between $1,200 and $1,500 per month. However, because of it’s drug class for HIV treatment, most insurance plans consider it as a “Preferred Brand” drug, or what they might call a “Tier 2” drug — the level right above generics. It IS possible that it might not appear on the Formulary or PDL (Preferred Drug List) of some carriers, but I would find it unlikely due to the nature of HIV infection, and the need for patients to switch drug regimens over time. Thus, excluding any HIV drugs could be considered life threatening.
How much you pay for that again depends on your plan, whether you have a flat copay, or if you have a deductible and coinsurance where you may pay 20%, 30% etc. You can probably check out the Formulary or PDL (Preferred Drug List) on your insurance carrier’s web site, and see where Truvada falls, or just give them a call and ask. With my plan, it costs relatively little, especially compared to its actual cost, and if you Google it, you’ll find that it has efficacy rates of 92% which is about what is expecting in the real world use of condoms.
I hope that helps with your questions, and here’s wishing you good sexual health!
Bully2
@jason smeds: Drugs and alcohol, I’ll grant you that, but aside from those actually subduing one’s immune response, your references to “promiscuity” and “sleaze” sound like something that former Senator Rick Santorum (R-PA) would be spouting at a campaign stop as he condemns homosexuals for the fall of the American family and western civilization in general. It’s puritanical, slut shaming, and basically saying that by having a healthy sexual appetite, guys are getting what they deserve when promiscuity (which is arguably what you meant when you were talking about sleaze), has NOTHING at all to do with HIV or other STD infections when proper precautions are observed. To suggest otherwise is puritanical at best, and at worst — well — it’s what Republicans in legislatures across the country and in the U.S. Congress want to use against the LGBT community to smash us like bugs any way they can manage. It’s the very reason that private, consensual sex between ADULT members of the same sex was illegal in much of the United States until just a few years ago, and reinforcing that hateful image/stereotype does more harm to us than Pat Robertson could ever do, because it comes from within.
Bully2
@jason smeds: What’s so NON-mainstream about young people going to bars, having a few drinks and dancing? Most folks, gay or straight, do this during their college years or in their 20s in general.
As for drug use, what’s your statistical data on drug use in this so-called non-mainstream herd gay community?
I must be frank, you really don’t SOUND very PRO-homosexual as you profess to be. You sound more like the person who says “I’m not prejudiced, but…” and then they proceed to demonstrate how VERY prejudiced they actually are. This is what you’re doing in each of your posts, and based on responses from MANY others, it looks like a lot of people feel similarly, putting you squarely in the minority.
What exactly is “the mainstream” that you THINK homosexuals should invade? Incidentally, why is it that you THINK that you get to decide what is mainstream for anybody other than yourself, and perhaps your minor child(ren)?
When a person comes out, younger or older, he or she often finds it easier to be around like-minded people. That is anything but segregation, it’s more like self-preservation. Further, you don’t get to decide what “TRUE” coming out is for anyone except yourself, because coming out is a personal journey, something that is unique to everyone, even if it may have similarities. Who exactly are you to judge anyone else’s path to self-discovery?
I’d also submit that stereotypically, gay men have healthier lifestyles unlike your claim to the contrary, they spend more time at the gym or exercising in general than their heterosexual counterparts, and they focus more on nutrition as well, so your claims about poor diets are also baseless.
All in all, I think you’re an ill-informed, under-read, constituency of ONE!
theszak
February 5, 2015
……………………………..
A low-cost smartphone accessory that can detect three infectious disease markers from a finger prick of blood in just 15 minutes, performing all mechanical, optical, and electronic functions of a lab-based blood test. That’s what team of researchers led by Samuel K. Sia, associate professor of biomedical engineering at Columbia Engineering, has developed. It performs an enzyme-linked […]
MORE |
http://www.kurzweilai.net/smartphone-add-on-tests-for-hiv-and-syphilis-in-15-minutes
Sydneyguy73
@timmm55: Timm55 your still at it again trying to beat down the real effectiveness of Condoms vs PreP (you call TasP and I call Trap). Seems you didn’t read the article but I wouldn’t expect you to as I know all to well that you are pushing a Barebacking Agenda. Please quote your figures with same benchmark instead of skewing the results to show figures from people using PreP under optimum conditions and figure on Condoms using the most problematic conditions.
Random
@Sydneyguy73: It’s not entirely clear what you mean by ‘barebacking agenda’ although it sounds rather provocative. However, you should note that the British HIV Association (BHIVA) has stated:
”There is growing evidence of extremely low/minimal risk of transmission when plasma HIV is fully suppressed with the use of antiretroviral medication. In some situations an undetectable viral load can afford protection equivalent to or greater than that of condoms. A person with HIV is unlikely to be seen as reckless when relying on a suppressed viral load instead of condom use if they have been counselled accordingly by an HIV clinician or similar medical authority. ”
This is contained within their position statement on the legalities of HIV transmission and forms part of the official guidance on how clinicians should describe the law to patients. Are you now going to accuse the UK’s leading HIV medical body and British doctors of promoting a ‘bareback agenda’?
Mattes
Reason #6 Don’t need to indulge in anal/oral to have a good time.
Mattes
@Random:
I think the freedom to indulge in the taboo is what the internet brought. The desire to engage in penetrative sex is deep down in any sexually reproducing species. The point however is to the control primitive urges. Consent isn’t everything. Gang bangers “consent” to hurting each other, but it’s still against the law. I find it amusing that so many see the illogic of wasting money on Truvada, but don’t see how condoms have never been truly necessary and are just as must a waste, relatively speaking. You either want to love someone or you want to fuck them. The use of latex doesn’t change the nature of the actors even if the act is slightly different. At some point there has to be a matter of principle. Of course the g0ys were saying this all along but were mocked because of the religious implications in their message. But really, who is the real homophobe – those who condemn sodomy or those who make it all too easy for men to be tempted to push the envelope into self destruction even further? Seem so common sensical to limit sex to outercourse that the cynical part of me wonders if there has been an enemy within all along, hellbent on ensuring that truly loving, equal m2m sex never becomes a reality beyond the rare couple. The state and church have much more at stake if the whole of society, when they hear the word homosexuality, envision kissing and massage rather than the perception that predominates now. Even if it’s only role is to be condemned, sodomy gives the materialists, the capitalists, the ability to remind us of the “value” of fucking, ie “breeding”. The truth is that people are still suffering with these diseases because we are collectively in denial of the truth about penetrative sex altogether!