Like the not-gay son Sally Kern ignores, Fred Phelps’ grandson Jacob is also not a homosexual!
The offspring of the Westboro Baptist Church founder can often be seen holding the group’s trademark signs, like “God Hates Fags” and “Jews Killed Jesus,” showing off Jacob’s heightened sense of world history. But what of these rumors that he’s a giant homosexual? Wouldn’t that mean — shudder — God hates him?
Asked if any love interests tempt him toward marriage, Phelps said he “never kissed a girl,” or “hugged a girl.”
“No love interest,” he said. “Never have.”
Asked if that may suggest that he’s a homosexual, Phelps laughed, a laugh that seemed to stop above his mouth.
“I can guarantee I’m not a fag,” he said.
Presented with the possibility that he may be unaware of his sexual orientation and that he may indeed be gay, Phelps conceded, saying, “I could be,” before doubling back and saying “there’s no question” that he is straight.
“It disgusts me,” Phelps said, of homosexuality.
Delicious.
So too is this reporter’s wink-wink men never bring Jacob, 25, to his knees.
How about we take this to the next level?
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Spending an estimated one-third of his income on church activities and activism, Phelps has little time or money for R&R. But considering “our generation is a bunch of perverts,” there’s no need for that anyway.
His co-workers often invite Phelps to a local topless bar, Phelps said, but he has never taken them up on the offer.
Impure thoughts, though only occasional and always not involving men, get Phelps on his knees.
“I get down on my knees and ask my Lord to get those filthy thoughts out of my head,” he said.
But it isn’t easy to avoid the cheap and lascivious. Sometimes, and without his prior knowledge, a sultry sex scene pops up in a movie he may be watching.
“Oh, God,” Phelps said. “I cover my eyes.”
GOD HATES HOLLYWOOD!
(Photo)
Bill
It would be funny if it weren’t so scary.
schlukitz
Denial ain’t just a river in Egypt. – Mark Twain
strumpetwindsock
See, there is a God!
*just kidding, boys*
Jaroslaw
I can’t remember where, but I saw Fred Phelps on a Nflix movie (small town Gay bar?) he actually was quite lucid in this interview – the interesting part was that he said being Gay can’t be changed, there’s nothing that can be done etc. God will prevail and so on. Very similar to that if I don’t have it exactly right.
So then I’m thinking, well, if God is going to ultimately prevail and Gay’s can’t be changed, what are YOU, FRED PHELPS, doing wasting everyone’s time protesting and being hateful?
I wish someone would ask him that. He’s right there on video, make him answer!
TomChicago
“God hates fags”, “God hates Jews”…They have become a trademark for the Hate Movement, and the good news is they are verging on the utterly ridiculous. How much foaming at the mouth can ordinary people stand?
Andrew
“Adorable grandson”? Um, that’s quite a stretch.
DM73
Don’t call him adorable. Call him what he is. Douche bag.
praenomenal
@Jaroslaw: I have actually seen him answer that. He is just giving fair warning. It is too late he believes but heck we should at least know.
What an asshole.
Rick
God hates Shellfish.
Dick Mills
List of the questions that should have been asked:
Have you ever ejaculated?
Or, When did you last masturbate?
Do you get wood while you sleep at night?
How big does it get when it’s angry?
terrwill
They’re in Kansas aren’t they? Can’t a good witch please, please, drop a house on the whole scumbag family????????
guarantee that fucking little queen looks at gay porn “just to see how disgusting those fags are”………..
Geoff M
A self loathing gay person in denial? Gee…..never heard of THAT before. It’s hard to love and or help someone with that mindset.
AlwaysGay
A gay person carrying out the discrimination and bigotry of the heterosexuals that surround him. Sad. Get a brain, some courage, a car and leave the family behind.
hardmannyc
I could hate-fuck him.
terrwill
But then again, being a self hating fag………. this little scumbag fucking queen has a great future as a consertive republican politician!!!
AngryFag
umm….erm
So the Phelps meisters believe that America is a modern Sodom & Gomorrah.
Shouldn’t they be leaving then? I mean, or else (according to their mythology) they’ll get rained on by brimstone or turned into a pillar of salt or something
I think we should be merciful and support them in their cause.
Let’s all buy them a one way ticket to the country of their choice…anywhere on the planet.
Then they won’t have to deal with that icky brimstone stuff. It’s so tough to get out of polyester.
Oh, and the added bonus: I’m sure we could all spring for First Class!
AngryFag
oh, we should send the young Phelps to LeviticusInternational
http://www.LeviticusInternational.com
Tom
I guarantee he’ll be a Republican Senator within 20 years. (Tap Tap!)
schlukitz
@AngryFag:
I’m sure we could all spring for First Class!
Count me in! LOL
Bill S
God Hates Jews.
Jesus was a Jew.
Ergo, God Hates Jesus.
These people aren’t just bigots, they’re morons. (Granted, “Bigot” ALWAYS overlaps with “moron”.)
This boy DOES remind me of the Chad Donella character in the movie “Hate Crime”, but that doesn’t necessarily mean he’s a closet case.
Jake
Oh, he’s a Moe alright!
Greg Ever
Gay or not, it’s a good thing he doesn’t have any love interests. Hopefully it will prevent them from reproducing and spreading their plague.
hyhybt
So the Phelps meisters believe that America is a modern Sodom & Gomorrah.
Shouldn’t they be leaving then? I mean, or else (according to their mythology) they’ll get rained on by brimstone or turned into a pillar of salt or something Other countries won’t take them. Really.
Robert, NYC
To digress, isn’t it amazing that the majority of these right wing psycho religious talkers vote republican, the party of no, obstructionism, regressiveness, hate and resistance to anything good, inequality for LGBT people and now claiming to be a party of inclusiveness.
osocubano
He’s not a fag?
Could have fooled me…
schlukitz
@Robert, NYC:
Madness and insanity have become endemic in America, unfortunately.
92% of Americans believe in God.
Could it be else wise in such an environment?
schlukitz
@osocubano:
Same here. LOL
If it looks like a duck….
edgyguy1426
Here, folks,in those 2 signs, is the philosophy of Duttybarb and YouCanTHandleTheTruth – This is the end result of their beliefs, hate begetting hate (sorry for the biblical word there). So how about a moratorium on responding to them, because you know these are 2 minds that are closed and will never be open to anything other than their beliefs.
It’s only when people believe that their beliefs are above questioning, that their beliefs alone are beyond all doubt, that they can be as truly horrible as we all know they can be. Belief is the force behind every evil mankind has ever done. You can’t find one truly evil act in human history that was not based on belief- and the stronger their belief, the more evil human beings can be.
To ‘know’ that what you believe is absolutely 100 percent now-and-forever utterly and completely True is the sickest, most vile, and most foul perversion in everything worthwhile in humanity,of all that is right in the world. Truth can never be found in mere belief. Belief is restricted. Truth is boundless.
edgyguy1426
But I’ll hazard a guess and say Dutty and YCHTT will not go near this post with a ten foot pole. The shame would be overwhelming.
schlukitz
@edgyguy1426:
But I’ll hazard a guess and say Dutty and YCHTT will not go near this post with a ten foot pole.
It’s a sure bet that they WON’T.
What they WILL do, is circumnavigate around your words and change the subject, which is their devious M.O.
The shame would be overwhelming.
Get serious. ;o)
These people have NO shame! If they did, how could they have posted all the horrible comments that they already have?
You are making the assumption that these are sane, rational, logical, well-read and well-educated human beings.
NOT!
strumpetwindsock
@edgyguy1426:
Good point, and I agree.
Unfortunately there are people on both sides of that argument who are just as closed-minded. It’s just as ugly when it is coming from people who agree with us.
TANK
@strumpetwindsock:
LOL!
This is what people like strumpet mean by “closed-minded”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T69TOuqaqXI
Deflated.
strumpetwindsock
@TANK:
Why so cranky, TANKY?
Are you taking my comment personally for some reason?
edgyguy1426
@schlukitz: I think YCHTT is well read, he/she seems to be able to argue a point but it’s a point based on his/her belief. Beliefs are subjective.
Josh
To be fair, there’s nothing wrong with a belief in a higher power. What IS wrong is when you take that belief (Or lack of belief, in the case of some fundamentalist atheists) and turn it into a weapon.
There is no proof that there is a God. There is no proof that there isn’t. NEITHER side is right on the “Does God exist, or not?” question, and if people would treat spiritual (and non-spiritual, for that matter) belief as it should be treated – a private, personal system used to make sense of existence – we would be in a much better place in this world.
To sum up, belief in a higher power does not preclude higher reasoning skills, critical thinking, logic, compassion, or any other positive aspect of the human condition. So stop blindly hating on people who DO believe in something, because you sound NO different than the Religious nuts who can’t believe that Atheists and Agnostics exist and think they should be destroyed.
Josh
PS, for the record –
I am an agnostic.
I was raised Baptist, left the church at 16, but remained a Christian until I came out of the closet at 20. Since then, I’ve tried just about every faith in the book, and even tried not believing in anything at all.
As an adult, though, I realized that – like everyone else on the planet no matter what they claim – I have NO idea what happens when I die, no idea if there’s a God or not, no clue if there are alien overlords beyond the stars, no idea WHAT – beyond what my senses tell me – may or may not exist.
I came to the conclusion that I just can’t believe this all just accidentally happened and that my entire existence is a pointless aberration of biology, so I choose to believe in something greater than myself, some purpose to human existence beyond birth-sleep-wake-eat-shit-fuck-death.
Guess I’m just crazy, huh?
TANK
@Josh:
I do know what happens when you die, josh. You rot.
TANK
And no biologist is saying that this is all a pointless aberration. COnsider yourself extremely fortunate that of all of the millions of combinations of your DNA that could have resulted in a different person than you–you were the one who beat the odds and is alive to experience everything. There is a lot to be thankful for without need of god or any supernatural explanation.
hyhybt
@TANK: True enough as far as it goes, but you cannot *possibly* know for certain that that’s all there is to it.
TANK
@hyhybt:
I think wittgenstein said it best.
“The real question of life after death isn’t whether or not it exists, but even if it does what problem this really solves.”
You have no reason to believe it exists, and reason to believe it doesn’t, though–that the naturalist explanation (which doesn’t assert or rely on a soul to live on) is false, that souls exist in spite of this explanation…that the entire natural order is suspended for the existence of your soul, so it can live on.
Josh
Tank –
And see, THAT attitude right there is why Atheists will always be on the sideline. That hubris and pride that you know all the answers.
Your faith in nothing is as strong as Fred Phelps faith in a hateful God.
You deserve each other.
TANK
@Josh:
That hubris? LOL! No, we just don’t believe that the entire universe was created for us. That there’s a bunch of unsubstantiatable prescientific rubbish about what we are as people that’s magically true for no good reason (and that’s inconsistent with the laws of physics)…and that there’s a beneficient skydaddy who loves us. But it’s OUR HUBRIS. Our lack of belief in these things is hubris…
My faith in nothing…so what you mean instead is my absence of faith is just as strong as fred phelp’s faith…how can my lack of faith be strong? LOL!
TANK
And the difference is my lack of faith in god can’t justify anything…really…whereas fred phelps’s faith in god justifies his homophobia and hatred.
schlukitz
@TANK:
There is a lot to be thankful for without need of god or any supernatural explanation.
Though I am not a religious person, to that, I will say “Amen”.
Why is it so hard for purpose driven people (Hey, another acronym…PDPs) to see that?
Why must there always be a purpose…for everything? Can’t something exist for the sheer joy of being?
Does a beautiful butterfly give a good shit “Why” it is here?
Does a rose give a damn “why” it exists?
And, if God does exist, does she need to explain it…or have a reason for being? For all we know, the whole thing could be a fucking joke.
Give it a rest!
schlukitz
@TANK:
That last sentence was not intended for you, Tank.
It was intended for all of the PDPs. LOL
schlukitz
@Josh:
That hubris and pride that you know all the answers.
While we give a pass to Christianity, Judaism and Islam…who ALSO know all the answers.
The port calling the kettle black?
Josh
schlukitz –
Please. Not ONCE did I say we give them a pass. What you and Tank are deliberately missing is that I believe faith (or lack of faith) used as a weapon is wrong.
Again, to make my point, there is NOTHING wrong with believing in some greater purpose to life than basic biological functions until cessation of said functions.
If it gives people comfort and encourages them to act more selflessly, where’s the harm? There is only harm in using your faith (or lack of faith) as a bludgeon to beat people with differing opinions down.
Please, folks, keep digging a hole for yourselves by doing just that.
TANK
@Josh:
How can the lack of something be used as a weapon? That’s like shooting a gun that doesn’t exist at your imaginary friends…ROTFLMAO!
TANK
@Josh:
You’re right that there’s nothing wrong with believing that supernatural non scientific stories are the case…well, there is epistemically (and there’s a war right now about “creationism” being taught in SCIENCE CLASSES in the united states, and has been for decades….humiliating) because it’s highly irrational. But if it weren’t for the harm it DOES CAUSE to believe in these highly irrational fictions, then have at it. I have said before on countless occasions that i Have no problem with the jains…they’re quite literally the most harmless people on the planet because of their religion. Of course, the content of their faith (Their beliefs) are all fairytale nonsense…but they should believe whatever they want so long as it doesn’t cause harm…
but religion does cause harm…christianity is harmful, and so is islam and judaism.
TANK
And ask yourself why christianity and islam are harmful. Well, read their documents. Those are not pacifist tomes…they explicitly command death and annihilation for the nonbeliever–inventing hell and damnation for those who aren’t in lockstep…there’s a reason why christianity and islam cause people to do bad things…
schlukitz
@Josh:
There is only harm in using your faith (or lack of faith) as a bludgeon to beat people with differing opinions down.
Ah…so it was we “faithless” atheists who collected all those millions to get Prop8 on the ballot then and voted to take the civil-rights of our brothers and sisters away from them.
Please, folks, keep digging a hole for yourselves by doing just that.
Yep. The Mormons and the Christians simply stood at the doors of the polling places and cheered us on as they watched us do that.
This cartoon was brought to you by “Looney Tunes and Merrie Melodies”.
That’s all, folks!
Josh
And again, you entirely miss my point. What a shock. I should have known better than to try to engage you in anything, Tank, given that every single post I’ve ever seen you make is full of the same self-inflated sense of superiority and self righteousness.
Keep talking, keep mocking. It’s not me who looks like a tool, Tank.
And Schlukitz? Again, where did I mention RELIGION? Not once. I said faith. The two are not mutually reliant. I have faith in a bigger picture, but I’m not part of any religion. SO, please, bring up Christianity and all that again. It’s as pointless as your attempts at humor.
I’m done discussing this with you both. If anyone with an iota of consideration and a modicum of respect for their fellow man – whether they agree with everything I stated or not – wishes to comment, feel free.
TANK
@Josh:
Actually, it is. You don’t have a point. Now shut the fuck up! Science is interesting, and if you disagree, fuck you.
edgyguy1426
I think when you give your (church, faith, priest,rabbi, imam, government etc.) so much authority, then they take that power and wield it in so many terrible ways. No one’s belief is the truth. Question everything and every one’s beliefs. Don’t give anyone the power.
schlukitz
@Josh:
Faith is bullshit.
Hoping for something to happen with no evidence that it ever will.
Believing in something that doesn’t exist.
Praying to someone/something you cannot see.
Basing one’s whole life on smoke and mirrors and diaphanous theories and belief systems that have no substance.
Try running a profitable business on the faith that you will make money even if the product you are selling is totally worthless and no one wants it?
Or maybe, you could send a rocket to Mars navigating on faith alone?
Try re-growing a missing arm or leg using faith?
Swim across the Atlantic ocean because you have faith that God will get you across it safely.
Have faith that we will one day again, see 25 cent per gallon gasoline and a five cent cup of coffee.
Have faith that you will never get cancer, arthritis or any other debilitating disease. That only happens to other people who havew no faith.
Meh!
Josh
LOL. I love it. I say that I think faith is good, and the ass-hat brigade comes in saying I don’t believe in science.
God, I love America.
Everything has to be one or the other, no nuance, no layers. I either believe in science, and therefore, am damned to hell by one side of the argument, or I believe in faith, and therefore, am a rube to the other side.
Fuck both sides. I happen to take the more nuanced view of the world than either the hard-core religionists or hard-core atheists can seem to comprehend. The view that science handles the physical side of human existence, and faith handles the spiritual side and neither needs to be in conflict. A view which the majority of the world agrees with, by the way, fuck-you-very-much.
More’s the pity for you guys. Enjoy spreading misery in Science’s name or Jesus’ name. Either way, you come out a huge tool.
hyhybt
@Josh: Amen! (now to find the ‘unsubscribe’ button; an hour and a half deleting messages is quite enough)
Josh
And, as a final clarification?
Belief in God does not automatically mean belief in the CHRISTIAN God, or the Muslim Allah, or any specific God. It means God. Period. Something higher than us.
Trust in Science does not – as the large number of scientists and doctors who believe in God proves – preclude belief in a higher power.
The only people claiming that either case is true are the insane mullahs of the desert faiths on one side and the pridefully self-righteous atheists on the other side.
Grow from love.
Josh
Edgyguy1426: You’re EXACTLY right. Any time we let ANYONE think for us, we give up our species’ greatest gift. I feel sorry for people caught up in religious fervor because they’ve given up an essential part of what makes them human.
Josh
HYHYBT: Thank you. Good to know I’m not alone out there. *Grin*
TANK
Belief in God does not automatically mean belief in the CHRISTIAN God, or the Muslim Allah, or any specific God. It means God. Period. Something higher than us.
Who said otherwise? Define this thing you believe in, then. Do that, and see if you any reason for believing in it. It’s as epistemically vacuous, once you put definition and meaning to what you’re saying as believing in pasta monster. But hey, go ahead. Be irrational.
Trust in Science does not – as the large number of scientists and doctors who believe in God proves – preclude belief in a higher power.
No, it doesn’t. It’s just a fair amount of them don’t believe in god or are religious. But many religious claims are inconsistent with scientific ones.
The only people claiming that either case is true are the insane mullahs of the desert faiths on one side and the pridefully self-righteous atheists on the other side.
LOL! No, there’s no comparison between atheists and mullahs, as atheism is not a religion or a view about the world. It’s not atheists who are fueling the flames of dischord between science and faith, keep that in mind–memorize it. Atheists don’t do that because there’s nothing inconsistent with their views and science. Not so with religion. Supernaturalism and naturalism are not compatible once supernaturalism makes claims about what is the case without any means of verifying it.
TANK
@Josh:
What is this nuanced view? Do you have a falsifiable religious claim you’re making? Of course not. Do you have a single reason to recommend faith in any of the supernaturalist claims you could make or belief in any of the god or gods you believe in? Is there a single question that is not already answered or could be answered that has any meaning at all, by science or the scientific method?
TANK
and something higher than us? That’s not very meaningful. The sky’s higher than us…LOL! What do you mean by “higher than”? More powerful? Energy? Like, the sun? Get specific about what you mean, or else it’s just gibberish.
TANK
and I believe in faith, too. I believe that faith exists–faith afflicts a lot of people. It’s belief in something for which you’ve no good reason to believe in it–no evidence, or argument for the truth of it, nada. But it exists just like christianity does, and scientology.
Josh
Hey, Tank? Though I already said that I wasn’t going to respond to you any further, here’s one more try to talk to you like a rational human being.
NO ONE KNOWS ALL THE ANSWERS. NO ONE. Not you, Not Science, not the Pope, not Barney. NO ONE. You cannot answer the most central question to human existence. WHY are we here? Science can answer the HOW, eventually. I have no doubt of that because I understand the scientific method and respect it. Though we still have no proof of abiogenesis or any explanation of how it could have occurred, we’ll eventually know the how. That said, Science has nothing to explain the WHY.
Nor does it explain what, if anything, happens to US when we die. We know about what happens to the body. It rots, decomposes, is consumed and goes back to the earth providing we don’t use ridiculous means to preserve the body past death. But what about what makes us US? Call it a soul, call it a mind, call it pneuma, call it whatever you like. We are self aware in a way that no other species on the planet is. Why?
You’re content with not bothering with that kind of questioning. Fine. Others are not. That does not make them less than you. That does not make THEM better than you.
We get it. You think you have ALL the answers and anyone who doesn’t kiss your ass is an idiot to be pitied. We get it. It’s nothing new. It’s the attitude all Mullahs have, and it’s the attitude all Zealous Atheists have as well. That is the ONLY point of similarity between mullahs, priests and atheists…the SURETY that they alone are right, and everyone else is to be pitied, mocked and/or killed for their opposing views.
So, Tank? Please, take your little point-by-point asshattery and go blow Richard Dawkins, kay? I’m done with you. I’ve said my piece. I’ve explained myself in terms a child can understand. If you wish to continue mocking people because it makes your ego feel better, do so.
I’m done.
TANK
No one’s claiming to know “all of the answers,” but in light of that, faith in the supernatural doesn’t automatically get support–faith in the extremely unlikely and for which no definitive answer can be established. That’s faith.
TANK
This how vs. why distinction is entirely vacuous, too. Questions for which there are no answers–if they’re meaningful–are just pseudo questions. For example, why is there nothing rather than something–well, there’s no way to even conceive of answering this question without either incurring an infinite regress (none of which need to rely on any supernatural cause), or saying something that’s meaningless for there’s no conceivable way of answering it. What would you need to understand and figure out to answer the question?
In fact, the beauty of science is that having all of the answers is impossible, for it’s a constant process of questioning the answers we have and asking new questions for which we don’t hae answers.
Certainly the supernatural dogmas based on nothing more than the fanciful creations of an author are less likely to be explanations for the way things are than careful investigation and testing of our environment.
TANK
What most religious people seem to be struggling with is not “meaning” but “purpose”. And they like to think of purpose in existence as being somehow designed by a creator or some such fiction. Well, we come to find out that in life, our purpose is largely of our own making, and what’s important to us and makes our lives meaningful are the product of living our lives, not having fairytales or delusions live our lives for us.
Iva Biggun
He doesn’t look that large to me… certainly not a giant…
Robert, NYC
@schlukitz:
Odd isn’t it for a country that has no state religion? Odder but extraordinary is that a country sucn as Spain with a powerful state Roman cult gets marriage quality passed, Belgium too and Holland (the first) that is almost 50% catholic. I just don’t understand why we’re so behind the rest of the more progessive nations and claiming to be number one. That myth has thankfully been put to rest by seven countries thus far. I predict Denmark will be next, maybe Iceland.
edgyguy1426
@schlukitz: well I guess we were right
jason
Phelps Junior looks as gay as a picnic basket.
schlukitz
@Robert, NYC:
I just don’t understand why we’re so behind the rest of the more progessive nations and claiming to be number one.
That makes two of us, my friend. I keep asking myself that same question daily.
schlukitz
@edgyguy1426:
It appears that way.
alan brickman
QUIT BLAMING STRAIGHTS FOR GAY HATE, OBVIOUSLY GAYS HATE EACH OTHER MORE…..
edgyguy1426
Who’s blaming straights? We’re blaming mind-controlled religious straights. HUGE ddifference.
schlukitz
@alan brickman:
QUIT BLAMING STRAIGHTS FOR GAY HATE, OBVIOUSLY GAYS HATE EACH OTHER MORE…..
Another member of the intelligentsia shouts his moribund opinion into the room, as if we are all deaf.
WBC 4 EVER
Lame attempt to attack WBC heroes…very very lame, overused and predicatable.