Vagina Dialogues

Gay Boy Learns to Love WeHo’s Lesbian Truck Stop Girlz as They Drink Him Under the Table

As a gay boy with a handful of lesbian and bisexual female friends, I’m no stranger to a good lesbian bar. And as I joined them for a first time this past femme Friday, I figured I was in for the same good ol’ drunken time that I’ve grown to love and enjoy. Friday night in West Hollywood is pretty much what you ‘d expect. A handful of boy and girl bars, a lot of attractive party people, plenty of booze, and a lot of decisions that you’ll probably regret the next morning.

But perhaps something I didn’t exactly expect to find would be the hourly all-female bartender dance routine that I found atop the bar at Here Lounge. Actually, “dance routine” is putting it mildly.

First, a siren goes off and absolutely everyone crowds the back bar like they’re being pushed into a train in china. Then the DJ yells, “LADIES! Get your mother-fucking drinks off the bar,” after which roll-call begins. One-by-one the Truck Stop Girlz, who are also the bartenders, strut onto the bar as we’re introduced to “Scout,” “Brooklyn,” “Charlie,” “Brown Sugar” and the illustrious bell of the ball, “Lolita.” And then they dance. And it’s not just some hot girls dancing on a bar – they’re actually rehearsed, organized, and talented dancers. The crowd goes wild: Dollar bills in the air, lesbians screaming, the whole thing. It’s all quite crazy and fun.

I was pretty satisfied when it was over, but it’s not done yet. The dancers/bartenders file off the bar – except for Lolita – and some birthday girl is called into the spotlight. You guessed it. It’s time for a very public lap dance and Lolita is not messing around. How to describe it, really? It’s an acrobatic, booty shaking, vodka splashing, art form. Even though girl-on-girl action isn’t really my thing, I was entranced. Yes, partly because I couldn’t help but wonder if it’s good for a vagina to have that much Grey Goose poured into it… but still…

They do the whole routine about three or four times during the night. If you’re ever in Los Angeles, we at Queerty (or at least this contributor) highly recommend the insanity that are the Truck Stop Girlz. And as a boy invader to this scene, I felt a certain lack. I know there is a divide within the boy and girl communities in the LGBT world, but as I was there laughing and drinking my butt off with a bunch of lesbians (who can officially drink me under the table), I wished it weren’t so divided. Why are we so afraid of mingling? Why do we keep ourselves so separate?

As regards the lovely ladies of Truck Stop, this post is bound to get some liberal-minded feminists upset. While it may not help them sleep better at night, I am happy to report that while meeting the “Girlz” during their off hours, it turns out that they are not just beautiful and excellent booty shakers… they are also interesting, bright, intelligent and awesome people.

Photo credit via TruckStopGirlz