In case you didn’t know, the question “Do you listen to Girl in Red?” is code for “Are you a girl who likes and would date other girls?” according to Urban Dictionary, probably because Girl in Red is the stage name of openly lesbian Norwegian indie singer Marie Ulven Ringheim.)
This was news to us, but one Redditor familiar with the Girl in Red code phrase is wondering if there’s a gay male equivalent.
Commenters on his post were quick to propose alternatives — and to offer queer history lessons. Here are some of their responses.
“Once upon a time, there used to be ‘friend of Dorothy’ to the point where the U.S. government wanted to know who the hell Dorothy was. I’d love to know what the current version of it is, though.”
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“I’ve had a guy ask me ‘Do you order the Meat Lover’s Pizza?’ as code and I took him literally. Funny enough, I do order my pizza with a bunch of meat toppings.”
“There used to be an earring on the left ear only (or right ear? I wasn’t even born) but I don’t think it’s still a thing” [“It was the right ear. this only stopped probably post-2010, maybe?” one user responded.]
“I like your boots.”
“Easy ones would be ‘Do you know Sean Cody?’ or ‘Do you like Andrew Christian?’”
Related: This is the secret language gay men used when homosexuality was a crime
“You could ask if he listens to Troye Sivan.”
“Do you listen to Charli XCX?”
“Kim Petras. Only the gays know who she is, LMAO.”
“You like Tyler, the Creator? What about BROCKHAMPTON?”
“Do you like Frank Ocean?”
“C—ksucker says what?”
Liquid Silver
Just sing show tunes. It works about seven out of ten.
Mack
Yep that’ll do it every time.
ElPillo
Is this what lack of imagination looks like? Sad for this generation
CityguyUSA
I doubt if any Millennials know show tunes. That’s kind of a forgone Era. Do high schools even do musicals anymore?
adb
The passphrase is, “Clang, clang, clang” and the appropriate response is, “…went the trolleys!”
Cato
Judy persists.
Joshooeerr
Good luck getting a response to that from anyone under 40. Unless they’re a Rufus Wainwright fan it’ll be “Judy who?”
kevininbuffalo
“Kim Petras. Only the gays know who she is, LMAO.”
I’m Gay and I haven’t a clue who she is. Of course I’m 65 and that might be part of it.
exgoalie
66 next month and I agree…who the heck is that??? ??
Thad
Check Kim Petras out. She’s not just for younguns.
controversial2019
Fret not. I’m 31 and I’ve no clue who she is. Maybe I’m too old to know. Maybe it’s a teen thing?
bachy
Kim Petras sings the pop hit of the summer entitled “Malibu.” She made her video by herself in lockdown. You can find her on YouTube by searching “Kim Petras – Malibu.”
Granny Spoth
” do you watch Tucker Carlson? “
MISTERJETT
“are you gay?”
Liquid Silver
I was happier earlier today, but I’m not unhappy at the moment. Why do you ask?
marcbruer777
One of my favorites was to ask, or be asked, “Does he sing in the choir?”
Another was referencing “dropping a hairpin.” If someone (verbally) picked it up, well, there was your answer.
Lastly, any reference to “beads,” “reading the beads,” or being “given the grand reading” was definitely a cue that something homosexual was afoot.
CarrieV
Ha. Some elderly gays who were in hospice where I volunteered always said that closeted gays would always get asked when they were going to find a gal and settle down. The secret reply to get out of any blind date or set up was, “I don’t want her, you can have her, she’s too fat for me”.
I heard one guy in his 30s utter this to another gay guy about some not-at-all plump woman, and I asked him if he was raised by his grandparents or something… and he looked at me wide-eyed and said yes, asking me how I knew. Ha ha, people raised by grandparents or older parents just use their phraseology more, that’s all.
woodroad34
Wasn’t calling someone “miss thang” a thing? I remember calling my sister Miss thing back in the 70’s and she’d call me Mr Thang. I remember being on a photo shoot with Chad Everett and he referred to someone as being “light in the loafers”…and then there’s “he likes his meat and potatoes “
Mack
I do remember the “friends of Dorothy”. When they were still sailing some of the cruise ships had “friends of Dorothy” meetings.
Joshooeerr
Even when the earring was supposedly a thing, nobody – NOBODY – was ever sure which ear it was.
CityguyUSA
That was because it was different based on the country you lived in. It was started by sailors that crossed the equator.
Prax07
I guess if you don’t know who Petra’s or Charlie is you’re outta luck? I don’t like Troy and not a fan of Andrew Christan’s underwear either. Sean Cody hasn’t been good since he stopped actually doing the filming. Guess I’m not gay if going by that list.
bachy
I seriously have difficulty discerning who is game and who is not. But these kinds of phrases and codes alert me only to the type of people I’m NOT interested in.
Cam
In the show “Real O’Neils” the straight brother had this suggestion when his gay brother didn’t know whether his crush was into guys.
“Ask him, You Gay Bro?”
Subtle.
succubus
what is better than “are you a friend of Judy?”
The real Bruce
Ya know guys, sometimes words aren’t even necessary. For many years just giving “The Look” was enough. If “The Look” was returned with a smile, you knew. N’uf said, yah?
mailliw110
For me, I figured out who was gay when they wiggled their fingers under the stall.