A gay man in Manchester, England, has seen one of his tweets go viral after being told by a date that he didn’t want to see him again.
Jacques (@flamencolambada), 23, posted the message he received from the man to his Twitter.
“Hey man, sorry for not messaging until now. I enjoyed our date last week but when you said the phrase ‘put my thinking cap on’ it kinda gave me the ick so I wasn’t really interested in pursuing things. Also do you know of any like soul funk hip hop disco kind of vibes DJs in Manchester?”
At the time of writing, the tweet has had over 72k likes and hundreds of comments.
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
ah right ok then 🙂 pic.twitter.com/cpamBahE3p
— jacques (@flamencolambada) August 22, 2021
We appreciate that little, inexplicable things can prove a turn-off to some people, but we’ve rarely heard of anything as petty as someone using the phrase “Put my thinking cap on” as a passion killer.
Then there’s the fact that Jacques’ date ghosted him for ten days, and then only messaged when he wanted to pick his brains about something (we hope “pick your brains” doesn’t also give some people “the ick”).
Related: Gay ghosting: How to navigate that special feeling when someone vanishes without a trace
Jacques told Queerty that he, “wasn’t super surprised” to not get a second date, “as he was quite awkward on the date and then ghosted me for ten days before sending this!”
Asked how he felt about the message, he said, “It just made me laugh as it was so absurd, but also a pretty accurate reflection of dating in Manchester!”
Many of those to respond came up with suggested replies.
Please say you replied with “I’ll have to put my thinking cap on”
— Kris (@deliciouslykris) August 22, 2021
Others said that anyone who uses “Gave me the ick”, had no right to police others on their use of phrases.
“Kinda gave me the ick” is a weirder phrase than “putting my thinking cap on”.
— david (@pearson186) August 22, 2021
“Gave me the ick” is a huge glass house to be throwing stones about
— Nick Toovey (@OneTooves) August 22, 2021
Here are some more reactions.
“Hey our date was cool but you said one thing that’s totally normal, so I don’t think I’m gonna be seeing you again. Oh hey by the way can you help me find a dj within the same rejection message. I don’t realize I look callous but clearly don’t care as long as I find this DJ.”
— Eric (@R3belGG) August 22, 2021
This is honestly the worst. I cannot believe people like this exist. I am actually astounded.
— Scot (@Tocs_Hornbee) August 22, 2021
Why didn’t he just say “sorry I just think we’d be better off friends” like that is so so specific hahahahahahaha what a weirdo
— 🥦jade. (@isjademyname) August 22, 2021
It’s the DJ request for me💀💀 pic.twitter.com/yIkAZgmGwC
— Andrea Di Giovanni | ADG (@andreadgiovanni) August 22, 2021
They would have absolutely hated my hat… pic.twitter.com/1qhuEWUBTC
— Gia (@VBG__) August 22, 2021
The fact that he has the gall to ask a favour at the end is so RUDE!
— Josie Long (@JosieLong) August 22, 2021
no, it’s my life that’s the joke xx 🤪😪
— jacques (@flamencolambada) August 22, 2021
Related: 4 ways to reject someone on a dating app rather than ignoring them
IWantAFullBeard
Three things:
1) Some people are allergic to cliches. Some people are really into linguistics.
2) I’ve met plenty of gay men who had explicitly told me they are looking for someone identical to themselves in appearance and personality.
3) It’s a funny story.
woodroad34
I’ve had a similar experience where after several dates I was told by my date that after talking with his psychiatrist he didn’t want to see me again. ‘Okay’, I said (there wasn’t a whole lot of emotional investment). But then he keeps calling me at work for phone sex.
JohnMc888
It was probably his psychiatrist calling for phone sex.
cubcmh
I love how “put my thinking cap on” unnerves him… but “gives me the ick” doesn’t?
trojanboy
The guy’s an ick.
tjack47
Vapid
Thad
Jacques deserves a good date. I’m sorry his dating pool is so shallow.
wikidBSTN
Hey – it’s always better that someone reveals their true self early on. The earlier the better.
JohnMc888
I would have recommended jimmy Ick Day, the Thinking Cap DJ.
BStewart27
Ick, of course, is a disease found in the goldfish bowl. The “date” belongs in the toilet bowl… I think.
Hussain-TheCanadian
This is why I always found it puzzling with folks who get upset over racists and bigots outing themselves in their own bios when they declare no to this or that.
It saves me a lot of time, effort, self respect, and integrity to skip such people and give my time and effort to someone else.
If the last guy I dated revealed his anti-asian feelings in his bio, I would of skipped him from the get go and not have invested 4 months of my life with him before the big anti-asian reveal.
winemaker
Dodged a bullet here
Mr-DJ
Best of example of “Dodging a Bullet”.
Oops! I’m sure that might give someone in Manchester “the ick” as well.
Sorry…!
Man About Town
Yet another assurance that getting off the dating sites & apps was one of the smartest moves I ever made!
shaniac
We all have our triggers. I dumped someone because they squeezed toothpaste from the middle of a tube like a caveman. Ironically, my husband of 18 years does this.
winemaker
The immaturity and rudeness of a lot of gay men never ceases to amaze me. That said, whatever happened to being adult, letting the other person know you’re not interested? This way it shows your maturity and doesn’t make you come off as some jerk. Wow, what a concept, maturity and consideration of other peoples feelings. Look at it this way, how do you like being ‘ghosted’ and never knowing the reason? Nobody owes you their reaon other than thanks but no thanks.