Get Thee To A Nuttery!

jesussaves.jpg
The Catholic Church isn’t down with the ‘mos – this we already know. And, as such, they’re not about to let a practicing faggot preach from their pulpit – a rule they put into law back in 2005, when they refused to ordain people “with deep-seated homosexual tendencies”. That ruling, however, left a little wiggle room for people who have experienced “transitory” homosexuality, whatever that means. But how can you differentiate between the priests who want some deep-dicking and the ones who have participated in a bit of suckee suckee? Psychology, of course!

Vatican advisor Father Gianfranco Ghirlanda has published an article in La Civilta Cattolica saying that church leaders should employ more psychological studies before ruling for or against questionable candidates. The method will not only sift through the sissies, but may help the “transitory” homos overcome their cum-guzzling ways. Ghirlanda writes:

…The range of situations between deep-seated homosexual tendencies and transitory homosexual tendencies is as great as the number of individual cases. What may at first seem deep-seated could turn out to be conquerable with therapy.

Ghirlanda insists that it’s the moral duty of the priest to comply to testing, but that results must not be distributed without the subject’s permission. Because the Vatican’s all about transparency.

Ghirlanda also says that heteros who haven’t reached “religious maturity” may benefit from similar testing. Ultimately, however, it’s the homos that need the most help because it’s more difficult for gays to be “mature”. Hmm, which is more evolved: sucking dick or continuing to discriminate against people because they suck dick?

Don't forget to share:

Help make sure LGBTQ+ stories are being told...

We can't rely on mainstream media to tell our stories. That's why we don't lock Queerty articles behind a paywall. Will you support our mission with a contribution today?

Cancel anytime · Proudly LGBTQ+ owned and operated