Log Cabin Rolls Over, Declines Vaseline

GOP Trim Platform, Keep Gay Ban

As the Democrats were holding their love fest yesterday, the Republican are releasing their party platform.

Though the Grand Oldies are trying to trim down their agenda, it seems they’re still committed to coming out against the queers. You know, it wouldn’t be a Republican party without a bit of divisive action.

And – surprise! – gay party members seem ready to roll over and take it, because no one enjoys getting fucked more than a gay Republican.

From the AP:

Despite the stylistic change, familiar divisions are back as Republicans debate the principles over two days and strive for a united front behind McCain. That means bridging some differences, detouring around others.

The platform draft calls for constitutional bans on abortion and gay marriage, two steps McCain does not support.

Sharp divisions still exist in the party on social issues, but there appeared to be little taste for complicating McCain’s chances by mounting a symbolic platform fight as the document is hashed out in Minneapolis.

“This isn’t a hill we’re going to die on,” said Scott Tucker, a spokesman for the gay rights group Log Cabin Republicans.

Tucker said his group is “more interested in substance than symbolism” and believes McCain to be an “inclusive candidate who understands that our party needs to reach out to all Americans to win this election.”

Tucker, with all due respect, are we living on the same planet? Have you been sent off into another dimension? This isn’t symbolic, Tucker, it’s rights. But, of course, the Republicans have never been good at thinking outside the box.