Employees at Parkbad Fitness Center in Linz, Austria are sick and tired of dealing with guys getting it on in the sauna, so they’ve decided to do something about it.
The center has hired “undercover enforcement officers” to hang out inside the hot room and keep their eyes peeled for any patrons who may be up to no good.
Sounds like nice work, if you can get it.
Naturally, since they officers are undercover, they’re required to be naked, because in Austria there’s an unwritten code of conduct that states all sauna users must be nude, regardless of whether or not the rooms are unisex.
How about we take this to the next level?
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According to sources, the undercover enforcement officers have already caught two couples going at it in the sauna. Since they aren’t actual police officers, however, they can’t arrest the men. So, instead, both couples were asked never to return to the gym.
h/t: Metro
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Graham Gremore is a columnist and contributor for Queerty and Life of the Law. Follow him on Facebook and Twitter.
wade.l
If guys meet in the sauna why can’t they just go and get a room.
MarionPaige
This story reminds me of those fucking security guards at The Gaiety Theater in New York. They destroyed The Gaiety long before it actually closed.
jwtraveler
“Naked undercover guards” That’s quite an oxymoron. It should be “uncovered guards”.
jason smeds
If you want to have sex, go get a room. Stop using the public facilities to get your rocks off. I realize that men are horny, period, but this doesn’t excuse it. One of the reasons that male homosexuality is so frowned upon is because men who seek sex with men can’t control their impulses.
erasure25
@jason smeds: God why do people keep perpetuating this lie. Gay men are not sex crazy. MEN are sex crazy. Straight, bi, gay, and everything in between, if you are a man, you are horny. Stop making this a “gay” issue. It isn’t.
rcs831
@erasure25: Dude, re-read the post you commented on. No where does he disparage gay’s. He say’s “Men are honey, period” and gay men all happen to be men so he was talking to men not gays. Don’t be so fast to get all butt hurt.
Saint Law
@jwtraveler: No, it’s a paradox: they’re disguising themselves by disrobing, you literal-minded pedant.
Saint Law
@jason smeds: Bet they somehow manage to control em around you.
Bob LaBlah
@MarionPaige: Good lord did you bring back sweet memories of NYC. I missed the Gaiety. I stopped going there after that dirty asshole who goes by the name Michael Lucas started making monkey sounds toward a black friend of mine one night who wasn’t interested in a private show with him and almost got his ass kicked by both of us. I never considered myself a violent person but Lucas was quick to find the last nerve of damn near everyone he came in contact with at that time in his life. I honestly am surprised that he is still alive.
The video arcade/book stores were also hot to cruise until the African clerks and security ruined them for the cruisers. They are just about a thing of the past just as the Gaiety is today. They all closed or are damn near about to.
Roan
@rcs831:
jason smeds
If you want to have sex, go get a room. Stop using the public facilities to get your rocks off. I realize that men are horny, period, but this doesn’t excuse it. >>>>One of the reasons that male homosexuality is so frowned upon is because men who seek sex with men can’t control their impulses.<<<
Reading not your strong suit?
jwtraveler
@Saint Law: What the hell is wrong with you? Did you inherit a pair of nasty genes from your nasty parents? Or do you have a pathological need to insult and denigrate people?
Daniel-Reader
It’s important to remember most of the planet is pretty ugly and don’t even like holding hands in public, much less knocking boots. Ugly people need to be taught it’s okay to be affectionate. The make-believe sky spirit doesn’t mind. Much of the planet pretends to drink blood and eat flesh regularly (christians) or they bow to the ground daily in worship of a meteorite at the center of a desert shrine (muslims) so lots of people on the Earth are plain nuts.
likearolingston
Linz, someone should probably point out, is the hometown of Adolf Hitler.
Arconcyyon
yes ! I´m is the super naturally since the present is home clubs sauna ilgbtt guards get naked and active is passive sex ! the home is descrtiion is pratic the sex luxury goso they is unissex mem clients ! because is they Guards Police is like the home club priver saunas the pratic the present sex anal and oral goso fasttfood ! Welcome ans Guards Police the Clubs Saunas Tuor City País ; ilary .
macroman
Sometimes one gets really embarassed over being gay.. like this time. Before flashing the homophobia card you better be sure what you are writing is true. In this case the writer of the article have a vivid imagination.They guards are there to detect people having sex no matter gender. Just google or follow this link, http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/real-life/naked-police-called-in-to-saunas-in-linz-austria-after-complaints-of-naked-sexual-activity/story-fnq2oad4-1227146218312, and you will found out that also a male/female couple has been ejected and banned allthough from another sauna in another austrian town. however to claim that the guards are there for detecting gaysex is ridiculous and nothing less than homosexual paranoia.
crowebobby
If those four guys are regular customers, I’m on the next flight to Linz!
macroman
@crowebobby: Really just to make a homostatement whe there is none called for? are you with stupid? Its a shared sauna male/female.. the gay guys went a bit to far since the sauna is a SAUNA and NOT a cruising area. (and I am gay just not to stupid to understand that a public, and if it mixed gender fuck have som manors, sauna is NOT a place for cruising whatever gender).
gaym50ish
I once got it on at a freeway rest stop with a guy who was hired to PATROL the rest stop to prevent sexual activity. He freely admitted that he was being paid to be there. He was not, too!
Brendan
What a bunch of buzzkills. I’m waiting for the story about one of the guards getting caught by another guard screwing a patron. Cuz that’s gonna happen. Or maybe I just watch too much porn.
SteveDenver
Time for the BREATHALIZER again… just wrap your lips around the mouthpiece and…
seaguy
Who is monitoring the guards. I can see some guard using his position of power to force men he catches into sex in order to keep his mouth shut.
Aires the Ram
Oh, get over yourselves. Men have been having sex with men in public spaces (parks, rest areas, saunas, etc.), since time immortal. It’s normal, it’s natural, and all the sex-negative carping I see in these comments makes me ill. And one commenter had it right, he said this is NOT a “gay” issue, it is a “male” issue. Very true!
It’s the Puritanical Hypocrisy that needs to “go get a room”, and nothing else.
Aires the Ram
And additionally, when they try to pass ‘religious grounds’ laws to allow straights to discriminate against gays, it’s to force gays out of the public sphere, when they raid gay bars it’s to try to get the gays out of legit gathering places, when they put undercover cops in parks, rest areas and the like, it’s to try to push the gays out of those public spaces. When they try to dis-allow marriage equality, it’s so they can continue to treat us as second-class citizens. See the drift here anybody??
Some of you want to shake your finger in disgust at some guy giving another guy a blow job in a sauna, but you’re playing into the hands of those who want us GONE; read: DEAD. If you think for one hot minute that us trying to mimic them a little bit more successfully will end their desire for wanting us gone, you’re dreaming.
It’s hasn’t been all that many years when gays didn’t have cell phone “apps” like Grindr/Growlr and the like, and actually had to GO OUT into public spaces to meet other gay people. We actually had to carry on CONVERSATIONS with people, there were no social networking web sites, no email, no cell phones, you actually had to interact with the real world, because if you didn’t, you sat home on Saturday nights, and the phone didn’t ring.
Jacob23
@Aires the Ram – Nah, it’s not normal or natural. Almost no human beings behave like this on a regular or long-term basis. The large majority of gay men do not behave like this on a regular or long-term basis. This is not about natural human behavior or inherently gay male behavior or about puritanism. It is about a subpopulation of damaged men who structure their lives around a series of meaningless sexual encounters with strangers. These folks are far more likely to report being lonely, suffer mood disorders, abuse drugs, suffer physical illness, and die young. Take care!
Dooey
@Aires the Ram: You’re an idiot. Gay men who have sex in public have no common decency for nature and the public. They leave condoms, lube packages, body fluids, and other paraphernalia to be or not to be picked up. And if I owned an sauna establishment I wouldn’t want to worry about cleaning up semen stains out of the cracks of my wood floorboard. Good lord, grow up and get some common sense.
vive
Public sex (which is usually NOT public but discreet) has a long and honorable tradition in gay culture. One reason for it is that gay people, even more than straight people, don’t have other places to have sex. This continues to be the case especially with young people today who more than in previous generations live with their parents or are forced by economics to share with roommates who are not fully accepting. Gay people still have more of a burden in this regard than straights. Nobody goes into a tizzy when straight kids have sex in the bushes, so this kind of hysteria is deeply based in homophobia.
Aires the Ram
@vive: Vive, ….exactly. Dooey and Jacob23 have obviously never lived in a time, or a place, where gay people had to hide in the back alleys, the shadows, the bushes, the parks. They sit on their self-imposed high horse and moralize, with absolutely no understanding of our gay history here in the Western world, and no knowledge of gay male reality in the majority of the world today. Ignorance is bliss, as they say.
petensfo
I only WISH we could get these guys at my gym… I swear, I don’t think they open the doors until a goblin or two is positioned in the steamer, trying (yet again) to get a circle-jerk going.
For the last time, if it’s on, it’s a party. If you’re the only one… please stop. It’s not hot, you’re now just sad.
SFHarry
One thing to consider is that you never hear of stings to stop straight people from having sex. They like to have sex too. They do it in cars, parks, bars, in alleys behind buildings, everywhere. You just never here of them getting busted by the police. When they do it is just frisky and sometimes embarrassing behavior. When we do it is is criminal misconduct. It doesn’t help when prudish gay people jump on the bandwagon and get all wound up when other gay people are just enjoying themselves.
connorlarkin19
@jason smeds: FACT– M on F rape every 45 seconds in America and Africa.
The problem is the ‘wider cultures’ with raping.!
verylittlegravitasindeed
@Brendan: I love you..lol
tdx3fan
@Saint Law: Now dude, you have to actually be attracted to the guy to have impulses.
Jetskijeff
How about no one has sex in public places? It’s disgusting.