A new Reddit thread asks users: What’s your least favorite thing about being gay? And the responses are all over the map.
“Dealing with legal and public matters,” one guy writes. “Like, getting a lawyer. I’m asked if married and when I say yes, I’m asked my wife’s name. When I say I have a husband and give his name, it’s always awkward.”
To which someone else replies, “Whenever this happens, I just give them my husband’s name and let them connect the dots. If it makes them uncomfortable it’s not my problem.”
Related: Guys reveal the craziest things they’ve done to stay in the closet
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
“Finding someone to date,” another person writes. “I can’t exactly walk up to any random guy and say ‘hey want to go out?’ because he may well punch me in the face.”
Another guy agrees, “Definitely the dating pool. My straight friends and family used to give me shit for online dating, but it’s like, when gay men are only 5% of the population, the chances of just randomly locking eyes with someone in a bookstore are next to nil.”
“The constant fear of having to have an awkward conversation with someone when they ask me a question that would prompt me to reveal my gayness and have an awkward exchange,” someone else writes. “Assuming I have a girlfriend, asking who I live with… etc.”
Related: These Locker Room Confessions Will Make You Renew That Gym Membership…Or Cancel It
“White supremacy and racism,” another person says. “It is a REAL issue in the gay community.”
“HIV,” some else says.
Other complaints include people assuming your boyfriend is your brother because you look alike, dealing with straight women who want GBFs, and coping with depression.
Then there’s this little gem:
“To be honest, these are real good points and very socially conscious,” one guy writes, “but after reading the topic I immediately thought: Prep work. :-/”
What about you? What’s your least favorite thing about being LGBTQ? Sound off in the comments…
Heywood Jablowme
“when gay men are only 5% of the population, the chances of just randomly locking eyes with someone in a bookstore are next to nil.”
You’re going to the wrong bookstores. Try the “bookstores” with the little booths in the basement.
happiness17
Actually only about 5% of the men in the population are out of the so called closet. There’s a percentage of men who are gay and not in the open.
andy_d
I have been fighting for FULL EQUALITY since I was 16 – 44 years now. What I like least about being gay is that I must continue to do so. Nevertheless, I WILL PERSIST!
GayEGO
Seeing the anti-LGBT bigots trying to stop our equal rights advancements.
loren_1955
Being gay and 60 or older. Seems like hitting 60 we no longer exist for most.
Jack Meoff
I think that happens to straights to.
miserylovedme24
The issue is that the 60 year olds still want to get with someone far, far younger. Why not get with someone your own age? Maybe younger people want someone their own age too.
Brian
Yeah, I’m pretty sure being a single 60 year old woman isn’t exactly a whirlwind of dating either.
JamJewel
Young gay people don’t know the half of it: there are many elderly gay homeless; there aren’t any affordable gay retirement homes; the depression that comes with not being able to support yourself in old age. Unless you’re well off or in a financially supportive relationship, things can be tough. Start planning, young gay people. Tomorrow is coming.
MediaGuy
Loneliness. I was already married twice. Once to a man once to a woman. The woman and I have a daughter. That’s really fulfilling, to have a biological child with someone. To make another person who will forever be my family. The rest was kinda lonely. I love dick but I don’t love gay relationships.
Mo Bro
Interesting.
I’ve never been in an actual long-term relationship with another guy, but my assumption has always been that it should be easier than a man-woman relationship, since men naturally have more in common with one another.
Perhaps I’ve been a little too presumptuous on this issue.
MediaGuy
Mo Bro. Since we are the same person you probably already know what I’m about to say. Hahahhhaaa. That said, I think that it’s the differences between the genders that make the world go ’round for me. The similarities between men DO make for a kind of simpatico that works too, but the differences win out for me. It might just be a matter of personal choice.
loulou2lou
If moderation is a form of censorship ,loudly do I protest.
phallictomato
Where do I begin…
The fear of having to tell someone in public that I’m gay – because people look at you differently/weirdly when you say it, and you can get the shit beaten out of you, for example.
The fear of rejection from friends and family – which has happened to me. My brother and his wife rejected me when I came out to them, and we no longer speak to each other. My father also showed his true colours later on when he said things about me behind my back that inferred that he never accepted my sexuality – despite him saying to my face that he did.
The assumption from everyone that you’re straight.
Comments from idiots complaining that they’re tired of the ‘gay agenda’ and that we need to stop ‘shoving your sexuality in our faces’ and ‘why isn’t there a straight pride’. I mean, if you have to ask others why there isn’t a straight pride, I’m sorry, but you’re thick as pig shit :-/
Finding other gay people is annoying because the chances are basically less than 5%. You can’t go up to a guy and ask them out, because they’re probably not gay. You usually have to date online or get referred. Kind of like finding a job, really.
I think above all, though, the most frustrating thing is the fact that you’ll never ever be truly accepted by everyone – unless you’re a straight, white, man. Then acceptance is automatically given. Society is fucked up, man. Seriously.
Brian
My least favorite thing about being gay is the assumption that I must have extreme left wing views on everything, and that gay issues should be my number one concern in life. I’m fairly moderate, some of my views are liberal, some are conservative, but that’s really not allowed to be an option anymore. You’re either a left wing, tree hugging hippie, or a right wing, abortion hating Trump fanatic, and if you’re gay, God forbid you be on the wrong side.
Mo Bro
Dude, your very astute sentiment could have been extracted from my own brain, word for word.
It’s been quite disturbing seeing how our gay brethren react when they learn we don’t want to join the anti-Trump “resistance,” or worse, that we voted for him.
Marry me?
adam_stevens
But, ‘the other side’ would just say the same thing about you, so yours is not so much a gay example as a human example.
Why pit gay men against gay men, when the gayness has nothing to do with your issue? Don’t we get enough of that from society?
MediaGuy
Mo Bro. Go ahead, hit on Brian right in front of my face. Boo on you.
And Brian, pay no attention to MoBro, he hates kittens and doesn’t manscape his bush.
Hahahahaa. (If you hook up want to see the film).
Mo Bro
@MediaGuy:
But . . . wouldn’t marrying you be sologamy, being that we’re the same person posting under multiple screen names?
ps – kittens are evil—it’s a fact.
Heywood Jablowme
“Marry me?”
Brian & Mo Bro, can I be a bridesmaid at your wedding? Please please please please please!
And please ask DCguy / Cam to be the flower girl(s)?
You need to be quick, though, before Anthony Kennedy retires and Trump’s next court pick decides that gay marriage isn’t “settled law” after all!
Brian
I came back to the party late, but I’m totally open to a 3 way if that helps.
Brian
Adam, being gay certainly is relevant to my issue. Within the gay community, you’re only allowed to have one political opinion.
joeboyle49
MY LEAST FAVORITE THING IS THAT WHEN YOU THINK YOU FOUND SOMEBODY THAT YOU WANT AS YOUR PARTNER THEN THE B/F THINKS THAT YOUR GOING TO SUPPORT HIM AND HE GETS LAZY AND JUST TAKES YOU FOR GRANTED!
woodroad34
The least favorite thing about being gay? The social need to be buff or bearish, extremely butch (or on the other side of the spectrum, extremely effeminate), and/or witty/ironic/sarcastic beyond measure–it’s all tiring on a constant basis.
Billy Budd
The prejudice. I can live with everything else. But the prejudice is intolerable.
Stilinski26
Depression, not allowed to be express yourself freely, loneliness, rejection from families, death threats, your existence being illegal in other part of the world.
Mykey
When you’re an old gay guy, in a retirement home, nothing in common to speak with the other old straights, now what to do…
MediaGuy
MoBro. Don’t tell CDguy but this whole “same person different screen” name thing is working out. When you jack off, I feel great. Keep it up. Hahahah.