HELLO SAILOR

Guys Share Their Most Awkward Boner Moments, Reader Edition

embarrassed_man_w640Here’s to oversharing.

Yesterday we asked you to let us know about your most embarrassing experience with unintended wood, and we’re pleased that so many of your didn’t have a problem revisiting a more, shall we say, biologically reflexive time in your lives.

Here are the highlights:

Scribe38’s hard wiring:

10th grade, electronics class, I used to dress myself to the right so this guy Chris could see my boner. He would look at it and I would watch him until he got one, too. We would be in the very back of the class. Of course, a teacher noticed my activity as I as making it bounce in my jeans and smiling like an idiot. Most awkward conversation with a teacher after class ever!

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Ladbrook’s Bard-on:

Junior year of college… 9 a.m. Shakespeare class (MWF). Without fail, my dick would go full-wood about 10 minutes before the end of class… for reasons that I still can’t explain. Leaving that classroom everyday wasn’t just uncomfortable but often quite embarrassing as well.

Desert Boy’s ticket to the mile-high club:

Dozed off on a flight, aisle seat, massive hard-on and I was awakened to cute flight attendant asking me if I wanted anything, his eyes on the prize, him smiling ear to ear.

GG’s modern dilemma:

Right now.

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rickyboi7’s daily commute:

Almost daily during junior high, the morning ride to school on the bus, all that bumping around, would give me a massive hard on. Thankfully, I usually had some books to hold in front, but I know it still looked like I was hiding a big ol’ boner.

Merv’s underwhelming display:

Sadly, I don’t think anybody would be able to tell, even if I was wearing spandex.

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SteveDenver’s musky fumes:

I worked as a valet at a nightclub and Halloween week was forecast to be warm (50s) and no snow, so a couple of guys volunteered to round up “gear” from their sports team — I somehow missed that it was wrestling. I got a gold singlet that smelled like clean hot musk (yes, I did give the crotch a long sniff as I was dressing). All night long random whiffs of the guy who wore it before me would hit and I’d pop a ridge. The manager said, “Don’t worry about it. If someone mentions it, just say, ‘Thanks, I grew it myself,’ and keep working.” One of the guys was a “leaker,” so I didn’t worry so much.