TAKE IT OFF

Here’s How To Instantly Find Sexy Pics of World Cup Players

higuainIn case you haven’t heard, there’s a sportsball match going on. It’s called “The World Cup,” and it is not an international goblet conference. It’s soccer, a game beloved by the British and almost never won by them.

These are exciting times for anyone who loves to run around a grassy field kicking a ball. But of course, even if you’re not an athlete, you can still be an athletic supporter. Our favorite part of any sporting match is objectifying the players.

And now, thanks to modern technology, it’s easer to do that than ever before.

If you see a player on the field whom you want to see naked, head over to hashtagshirtless.com. Enter in the team and jersey number, and voila! A procedurally-generated collection of sexy photos of that player.

Hooray for the male gaze and power fantasies!

Unfortunately, because the images are gathered by a computer, you don’t always get the results you want. Many are not, in fact, shirtless. And don’t bother looking for photos of Gotoko Sakai on Japan’s team — because he shares a name with a company that makes knives, all of the photos on his page are of cutting implements. Whoops.

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