A few days ago, former Congressman Aarons Schock, wrote a letter to the world “coming out.” Before this day of truth, Schock was known for his opposition to marriage equality. In April 2010, he said “I do not support gay marriage; I believe in the definition of marriage being between one man and one woman.” Schock was praised among his peers as one of the “most conservative” voting records in Congress by the American Family Association.
Then in 2015, Schock came under fire as he was accused of lavish spending. He was ultimately indicted on 24 counts of corruption, wire fraud, and theft of government funds. On March 6, 2019, all of the charges against him were dismissed. A year following his acquittal, he came out.
For the past few days, there has been an incredible amount of hate-filled rhetoric about Schock’s truth laid bare. Comments referenced how he deserves rejection, pain, and heartache, and wishing his forever loneliness. But while Schock’s past will forever be etched in history as a detriment to the LGBTQ community, his future is yet to be written.
What Aaron Schock lost on March 5, 2020, was not so different than what so many in the LGBTQ community experience throughout their lives: familial rejection, negative stereotypical statements, and a damned career. This once Republican Prince had officially fallen. It brought him far away from the party doctrine he once devoutly protected. It was a betrayal of his accolades of conservatism, but it was real.
No Schock did not explicitly say, “I am sorry.” Nor did he communicate the regret of his opposition in a way that the people wanted. He did not relay his sentiments as most would have preferred, but he did one of the hardest things any member of the LGBTQ community has ever done. He came out. He said the words, “I am gay.”
For the first time in his life, Schock has experienced the persecution that he authored all those years ago while he was in Congress. Much of the LGBTQ community has already chosen to make him an outcast. But what if we decided to take a different approach?
What if we decided to love?
I do not propose loving him because he is pretty. I suggest loving him because, in many ways, he is not so different than you and me. Our community has enough hatred.
Yes, Schock chose political success over the LGBTQ community, and it cost him dearly. He must now live with the decisions he made in his previous life and start a new. But, like every LGBTQ member who comes out, he is reborn. He is a new person. He has quit hiding in the shadows and accepted who he is.
Rather than prosecute Schock for past decisions made years ago, let us give him hope for better decisions made in the future. Let us give him a chance to experience acceptance for who he is and not for who he was. Let our community, the community of love, be the open door to a new life.
Michael Aycox is a former United States House of Representatives candidate (MS03), United States Navy Veteran, and advocate for change. He holds an MA in Strategic Communication and Campaign Management. Founder of One Mississippi, an organization whose purpose is to break down divisiveness and advocate for those whose voices have been silenced.
Ryan99
I suggest we forget him.
Let it go. His 15 minutes are way over.
Chrisk
Agreed. We’ve got bigger fish to fry then this douche.
redzebra1
It’s going to be longer than 15 minutes, he said me might run for elected office again remember!
Stephen
I have compassion for the guy.
The underlying message suggested is lov8ng-kindness.
‘… let he who has not Fk’d up throw the first pink baton at him!’’
So? I actual said a few hurtful things in front of gay men before I owned up to putting myself and apologizing. I was called out as a ‘hypocrite’. Not my honesty & apology, but my past behaviour. I thought took it, walked away knowing I do it in my terms for integrity not for approval and sympathy. But the guy I insulted badly forgave me. We became lovers for several weeks. Stud muscle man walked into a party we were at and I was dumped in a red hot second! They were a team. 12 years! We never lost touch. Great men! Hot couple!
Countervail
Here’s a radical idea. Since the gay community didn’t force Aaron Schock to be anti-gay in the first place, maybe we shouldn’t tell the gay community to forgive and forget the harm he caused as an elected leader on institutional issues important to gay people.
And then, maybe when he’s actually shown some enlightenment on these institutional issues important to gay people, maybe we can forgive and forget as a community.
Do as you will as individuals. Obviously there are a lot of horny gays happy to work the D of a sell-out because he goes to the gym on a regular basis. But acknowledging being part of the tribe while still fundamentally supporting institutional things that hurt the tribe is no basis for forgiveness.
nobass
Let’s leave him be. There are traitor gays who are still in politics (Peter Thiel, Dave Rubins) who are still active threats. Why are we wasting our time persecuting someone who is now a nobody?
PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
FCUK HIM.
He betrayed who he knew who he was. there are plenty of other closeted politicians who managed to be absent for votes, he openly and outwardly supported anti-Gay measures screw him he’s an arrogant pernicious puddle of puke
Stephen
He has had enough struggles.
Traumatizing paparazzi were merciless!
I know he’s fallible and trying too hard out of conflict and resistance.
He is no less deserving of empathy.
We don’t know his back story fully.
jimmypalmieri
Don’t DARE compare him to all of us. At least not me. I was NEVER in a position of power to harm LGBT folks as he was. He made his bed….let him lay in it. He is a leper. He needs to apologize PROFUSELY, AND DEDICATE THE NEXT 10 YEARS OF HIS LIFE VOLUNTEERING for LGBT causes. He is a real life bogey man for those of us on the front-lines all of our lives.
david_warner
No, thanks!!
Jim
Yep, you should forgive and forget but Schock did waaay too many anti-gay actions and protestations. You can’t walk that far back. Best punishment for his evil actions is to totally forget him.
Jon in Canada
Here’s a radical idea, how about you stop pretending he is in anyway redeemable given he has yet to offer up even a sliver of an apology for what he did. He can die for all I care, such is the waste of flesh named Aaron Schock.
BXnyBlatino
^^^^ What they said….
WSnyder
What Aaron Schock did to the LGBTQ+ community was self-centered and hurtful. But not surprising since he’s ambitious and narcissistic. Me personally, I’m like now that he’s come out, Move On. He’s a footnote in our history, nothing more. What happens to him now is between him, his family and friends. What I would point out is that his motives are not all to different than many of us. Too many of us do hurtful and self-centered things to the community as a whole, so focusing on this guy is aiming in the wrong direction. Having been subject to hurt, humiliation, scorn, rejection from people IN the LGBTQ+ community and MORE so than people outside of it, I’ll stand on the soap box to preach about the sins many of us perpetuate on ourselves. Discrimination in the community for race, age, disability, identity, and the labels we what to use [Bi, Trans, Asexual, Poly, Pan, etc]. Now that he’s come out, we’ve vented, it’s time to focus on one of the BIGGER issues in the Community. How we’re treating others in the Community. And in my experience, I’ve been hurt more by people inside than outside and it’s just damn wrong.
Michael
I quite agree with what you’ve written, the LGBTQ+ community can be more hostile to our own that don’t fit in with the requisite look. How many have written on profiles no fats, fems, T.V’s masc only… etc. We all have something to contribute, to show that this life we live is as normal as anyone else’s. If we discriminate him because of ‘past beliefs’ are we any better? What this man did was so harmful to us as a community all of us – gay, bi, trans, t.v’s, suffered for his career. Yet he has now officially lost everything, family, friends, potential jobs – he’ll face ridicule, homophobia, bigotry… Do I feel pity or kindness towards him? No, not really well not yet, he’ll have to start his whole life again knowing that he helped set back the cause of equality – ultimately his own equality. No one should be punished continually for their ‘crimes’ let him serve his time in his own purgatory THEN all of us should move on. We don’t have to forget, but I hope no one is irredeemable, time will tell and ultimately he’ll show his true colours…
Den
If people don’t want to be punished “continually” for their crimes, they should express contrition and demonstrate the desire to do better in the future. From his appearance and actions, all he really wants to do is shoot lots of loads with hot men.
There is no indication he has any interest in atoning for the damage he did and the hurt he caused. Those things were, and are real.
Was there a reason to forgive Roy Cohen and welcome him into our ranks?
Granted Schock is not as bad, but they were cut from the same mold: amoral and self absorbed, unwilling to acknowledge their actions had consequences in the lives of others.
In Judaism to be absolved for one’s sins by God, one must first acknowledge those you have sinned against in the community and ask for their forgiveness. He has shown no desire to do that at all. It’s all “here I am, come suck my dick!”
markie
Thank you, Michael. I’m totally with you. To quote a late, great gay man, W.H.Auden, “We must love one another or die.” Love is all there is. Thank you.
IAMSONICE
No polyanna. Love isn’t all we have. We have tonnes of hatred that we don’t snuff out properly because of this love crap. Think of all the LGBTQ people who have suffered at his hands. Maybe we should just love hitler and Mussolini since all we have is love.
Kieran
You can’t love anybody if deep down you hate yourself. Clearly, so many of these bitter, angry queens are afflicted with self-hatred. Let them stew in their own vitriol and ugliness.
Den
Amusing that you think people who want someone else to simply acknowledge the wrongs they have done are “filled with self hatred”.
There must somewhere be remedial thinking classes for folks like you who seem not to understand anything, ever.
And no, I don’t hate YOU.
I pity you, and all the regressives so removed from reality.
jaxtonypiper
No, yeah, that’s the problem… bitter, angry queens…
NOT the fact that he actively pursued VERY anti-lgbt laws.
NOT the fact that he voted against marriage equality.
NOT the fact that he was all for the degradation and systematic dehumanization of LGBTQ people, as a whole, during his term.
NOT the fact that he is suddenly able to enjoy the very stuff he claimed were detrimental to society.
But the ones angry at him and hurt by him are the problem. Poor Aaron is the REAL victim, here.
phoenix.postqueer
How about no.
JerrySloan
On March 5, 2020, former U. S. Representative Aaron Schock finally announced that he is gay. Schock represented the 18th congressional district of Illinois which included the city of Peoria for six years.
For the last year and a half Schock has been seen at various gay venues but still classified himself as straight
As a Republican Rep. Schock was at odds with three fourth of the LGBT+ community politically. He was elected to Congress at the age of 27. He is now 38 years old.
While in Congress he voted against several pieces of LGBT+ legislation including ending “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” for the military and Same Sex Marriage.
But the real question is how did this gay man become so conservative and so infused with internal homophobia?
Let’s start with his family church, The Apostolic Christian Church. Sounds harmless enough until one understands most Apostolic churches are “Oneness” in their theology.
What is “Oneness?” This means they do not believe in the “Trinity,” Father, Son and Holy Spirit (Ghost). They are so conservative they forbid their parishioners watching TV. They just come short of snake handling.
As we used to say in my Fundamentalist Baptist youth, “We don’t dance, we don’t chew and we don’t go with girls that do!”
On a personal level I can sympathize with Aaron. I grew up in a Fundamentalist Baptist church. The late and unlamented Reverend Jerry Falwell, founder of the Moral Majority, was my school mate at the Baptist Bible College located in Springfield, MO., where I studied for the ministry. My denomination was to the right of the Southern Baptist Convention whom we considered liberal and modernists.
I am now an 82 year old out and proud gay man. I came out in 1960 when we had no place to learn about being gay but in the bars. Anything we found at the library in book after book reiterated what perverted and mentally damaged people we were.
From the age of 12, I had crushes on other boys, but until I came out at age 23 I didn’t know why.
Even after coming out, I still had many fundamentalist beliefs. I struggled with these beliefs for many years. Although as a Baptist I took comfort in their belief of “once saved, always saved.” Aaron’s theology would send him to hell for watching TV. His belief system had so many ways for him to backslide into hell and being gay was certainly one of them.
So while we may criticize Aaron politically for votes in Congress we should sympathize with him for the religious struggle he has endured for many years.
If we are comparing damages he certainly has not damaged us as those who led the Exodus Movement which caused turmoil in many LGBT+ lives and led some to suicide.
Aaron has now come out and we should welcome him as a gay brother and encourage him to speak out for LGBT+ rights that are under attack by the Trump administration.
RoughRugger
Jerry, with all due respect I say “Shenanigans.”
PLENTY of us grew up in conservative religious backgrounds. I myself grew up in the church of Christ, a denomination conservative enough to make virtually all Baptists look progressive by comparison. Despite spending 27 years trying to push down & deny “those urges,” believing I was hellbound for walking by the underwear display at Sears or watching Olympic swimmers, I STILL somehow managed to avoid acting as a champion for anti-LGBTQ legislation. I never advocated or campaigned against marriage equality, never cast votes against gays in the military, never earned a zero from HRC for my anti-gay work. Virtually every LGBTQ person I know, even those from similarly conservative religious backgrounds (and I know a hell of a lot of ’em) similarly avoided voting for legislation that would deny civil rights to members of the communities they were trying desperately NOT to be a part of.
Schock, obviously, cannot say the same…and though he’s now come to terms with himself enough to acknowledge the sexuality that ALLLLLLL of us knew without him saying a word, all he seems to want to do is dabble in the most superficial elements of the gay community. Yeah, he’s happy to flirt with the muscle queens at Coachella or stick dollars in a gogo dancer’s jock, but he’s yet to acknowledge any real understanding, much less remorse for his years of anti-gay advocacy. He’ll hang out in a cute pair of trunks by the pool at the gay resort or some tight booty shorts at a circuit party, but can’t do some work at the local gay community center or an HIV fundraising event.
So yeah, no, I will NOT be “welcoming him as a gay brother.” Unless & until he demonstrates even the most basic level of understanding of the impact his hypocrisy had & continues to have on our community, unless & until he at least ATTEMPTS to make some form of restitution or atonement for that harm, he can go hang out with the bachelorettes, because we don’t want ANY of ’em around.
adb12
We should “encourage him to speak out for LGBT+ rights”? Why? Because of the remorse he expressed over the numerous actions he took against the LGBT+ community? Oh, that’s right–he didn’t do that. So I don’t expect him to do a single thing for us. I hope he proves me wrong.
JoeMannyB
To say “all charges were dismissed” is disingenuous. Charges were dropped by prosecutors because Aaron Schock agreed to pay back the funds his misappropriated/stole and he had to complete a deferred prosecution. He resigned in disgrace from his office. I frankly don’t care about his anti-gay rhetoric and voting record while in office. What I do care about is that he lied and failed the good people of Peoria who voted him into office. Whatsmore during his trial, he and his attorneys accused the prosecutors of “making up” rumors about his sexual orientation to discredit their case. Holding elected office comes with a huge responsibility, he failed his district. The LGBT community doesn’t need Aaron Schock to be an advocate or representative and we’ll get over this, his constituents, on the other hand, deserved much better.
IAMSONICE
Thank you for the TRUTH. He is despicable.
Gandalf The Grey
Correction. He only paid back a portion of the funds!
carlton
I am an out and happy gay priest of the Episcopal Church and have been a staunch supporter of my queer brothers and sisters even when it wasn’t popular. I know that people can change in many wonderful ways because I did. At one point in my life I was as crippled with self hate as I suspect Aaron Schock was/is. Give him a chance to grow into the love he had hopefully found for himself so he will be able to give it to others. He is loved by God- even though he may not be welcome in many ersatz faith communities.
trickster3737
NO.
Never.
He deserves scorn, ridicule and isolation from the Gay community at all levels.
I don’t care how pretty you think he is – and all this forgiveness stuff is all about how cute he looks – he earned nothing but derision and scorn.
He deserves nothing but derision and scorn.
Nope.
Never.
mz.sam
Hell No!!! F**K HIM….I would.
DennisBTR
I get it – coming out can be a long and stressful process. I was married for 11 years to a woman and have three children. I did not come out until I was thirty-two in 1993. It was difficult to say the least because of my children (who were all under 9 years old) and being from a conservative southern town with a very conservative religious family. It took years for some of them to come around – some still don’t talk to me -their loss not mine.
However, it is much easier to come out now and the real problem I have with Aaron Schock, is not that he was so anti-gay (people do change their point of view over time with personal experiences and enlightenment), but he has refused to say he is sorry for all the hurt and pain he caused our community. He hasn’t taken back one anti-gay stance he had.
Maybe he is one of those self-hating gays, maybe he is just a complete jerk or maybe he does not really support the gay community and the struggles we have and continue to experience. Either way until he is genuinely sorry about his past positions he needs to be held in contempt by the entire gay community.
radiooutmike
My situation was similar. I was with my wife for 23 years and we have two kids. I came out when we separated when I was 47. I think you have have pegged Schock right.
trsxyz123
Not without an acknowledgement from him of the harm he has done, and an apology. Then we can discuss forgiveness.
adb12
“For the first time in his life, Schock has experienced the persecution that he authored all those years ago while he was in Congress.”
No. Most gay men who have been persecuted have been persecuted simply for being gay. Schock is guilty not only of taking action against the LGBTQ community, but of showing zero remorse for his actions. Sorry, “love” has its limits, and he has clearly exceeded those. If we see him actually act to change the status quo? Then maybe I’ll give him a chance.
radiooutmike
I have never been able to understand guys like Schock, who actively try to hurt the community of the identity that they struggle with. That’s a lot of hate to have for yourself that gets displaced I guess.
Cam
Once again the LGBT community is basically called “Bullies” for DARING to be upset that somebody voted for YEARS to attack us, strip away our rights, and EVEN vote against us being able to hold jobs. To say nothing of the fact that Schock voted for a Constitutional amendment to enshrine bigotry against us.
But no, we’re big meanies and bigots who harm us should never be inconvenienced by having to feel any disapproval for their actions.
Here’s an idea, why don’t you write a new article on how mean the black community was to Dylan Roof and how he should be treated with love, or how women are being too hard on Harvey Weinstein.
Sorry, when the guy not only refuses to apologize but tries to drag Obama’s name in to defend himself, he is still showing us who he is.
TheMarc
AB-SO-LUTELY!! Well said!
Den
Perfectly put.
And you will notice that several of those defending him and saying he is worthy of forgiveness are the same group that routinely call Trump the most gay friendly president ever, and who always defend those who want to strip us of our rights.
redzebra1
Yep Den, the gay GOP trolls defending Trump are out to defend & deflect from Aaron Schock too! WE’RE wrong, not Aaron and his bigoted party………
PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
1000% Co-sign!
He made his own hateful bed now the vile repugnant smcubag has to wallow in it
Irish373
Treat him with love = show him what we are made of – not a bunch of hateful people, but people who can be better than he was to us.
Den
Being better than he was to us is no mean feat. It just involves not actively oppressing others.
But welcoming him with open arms does him a disfavor as he will never understand that his actions had and have consequences.
And he will never understand contrition.
Wolfwalk
Sorry, but anyone who’s walking around in perfect health, with loads of admirers and a future who complains of how difficult his life was “wrestling” with his sexuality while actively advocating against our community is not worthy of my respect. Matthew Shepherd and untold thousands of others in the LGBTQ community were murdered, tortured, committed suicide, disowned and bullied because of people like Schock who did nothing to help or actively advocated against them. I have no sympathy and I will show him no support.
dylanhorner
I think you make a very interesting point here and yet this is why this whole story has been a controversial one as it raises the question, “when or how long do we hold somebody’s choices over their head?”
In this situation it’s tricky because of the irreversible damage he caused paired with his lack of wanting to take responsibility (seen when he references Obama, Hilary and many others when it came to marriage equality vote). Yes, his post was mainly about his coming out, but as many know, everybody’s coming out never goes according to plan and his coming out needed to acknowledge his FULL past when it came to our community since that was apart of of his coming out journey.
This idea of just being gay or apart of the LGBTQ+ community makes you exempt of any wrongs and makes you immediately deserving of unconditional love is dangerous rhetoric. We saw it with Kevin Spacey and it seems from this perspective, the same is being implied.
I believe there is opportunity to learn and grow from this for him, but in order to move forward we need to acknowledge and address the past for what it was no matter how messy and uncomfortable it may be. That’s the first step in healing and receiving love.
brdbointx
Are you for real? The guy is the worst kind of closet case-turned gay (not gay advocate). Not a hint of regret for his actions, voiced opinions, and votes.
There is a special place in hell for guys like this.
Wolfie
“I do not propose loving him because he is pretty”
Please gurl. Yes you do.
And no we won’t.
He was secretly sucking dick and bottoming for Paul Ryan while trying to take our rights away. So no. no kindness.
How about some tar and feathers though?
RomanHans
Wow, this is a stupid article. Schock came out because he’s unemployed and hot and wants to do nothing except fondle other hot guys. After the “straight guy” was caught on film six or seven times, he didn’t have much of a choice. And strangely enough, I don’t think self-hating, shallow, grifting, shoved-out-of-the-closet hypocrites are just like the rest of us, and I think they deserve all the scorn they get.
redzebra1
He isn’t unemployed, he works in real estate. Not being in public office anymore doesn’t mean he’s not working. He needs money for tickets to VIP areas of the events he goes to remember!
SiamSean
You reap what you sow- He sowed hatred, he gets hatred back. No high road available here- He’s in the same boat as the “confused” men who drag female spouses and the kids they continue to produce through the dirt while trying to “find themselves”. Only this a-hole did it on a far grander scale. Take Limbaugh’s hand and skip straight into hell.
Donston
One thing we need to stop doing is treating “coming out” as a get-of-jail free card. It does not absolve you of all your past misdeeds. You still need to take responsibility for your past. And “coming out” is often very calculated. If he wasn’t “gay” he’d be just another politician who supported Conservative agenda and voted against human rights. Honestly, both in present and when he was in office Aaron has come off like an opportunist who is more about sociology, ego and power than anything else. I doubt he ever cared about politics. He doesn’t want “forgiveness”. He just wants to go to gay clubs, post pics of him on vacation with his bf, and post thirst trap pics without people bothering him. He likely still couldn’t give a rat’s ass about our “community” even now. There’s no doubt that if he were still in office he’d still be closeted and likely still voting anti human rights. And there’s a pretty good chance that even now he still contends with internalized homophobia, gay shame, victim complexes and superiority complexes.
I sympathize with hetero pressures, family pressures, mental health struggles, internalized homophobia, the general fragility of the male ego, contending with fluidity or confusions or not really knowing where you are in the romantic, sexual, affection, emotional fulfillment, relationship contentment spectrum. But what we have here is a narcissist who wanted to be “free” because he no longer has political power, because he’s been living in such a transparent glass closet and because he wants to use his identity and looks to maintain relevance. No one should looking to forgive him, because that’s not what he truly cares about, and his statement reflected as much.
This is generally exhausting and I’m over it. It’s our responsibility to move the fvck on, because continuing to use this dude as a “bad apple” example does not do anyone any good. Just move on.
redzebra1
He blocks people on Instagram that confront him on his record in office!
controversial2019
I find it more disturbing and disgusting that any gay person who has different beliefs or morals to those on this forum, are instantly “disgusting” and treated so badly.
People (gay or straight) are entitled to their own beliefs. One might find it “odd” or “insulting” if a person’s beliefs go against the general well-being of said person’s “community”, but at the end of the day, we are all entitled to our beliefs and those beliefs might contradict those of the aggressive and hateful people on this forum.
I do not agree he needs to apologise for voting how he voted. Can you imagine if people started demanding apologies because you voted for Clinton or Pete or even Trump. People should never apologise for how they vote. Even IF their politics change and how they vote now is different to how they voted five years ago, they should not have to apologise for having an opinion that “the community” did not or does not agree with.
Teban C
Oh no .. he is not disgusting because of his political alignment. He’s getting all this hate because when he had political power, he did everything possible to undermine policies that would ultimately benefit him. He is VERY cynical and if you can’t see that, that’s on you.
adb12
Sorry, but I can tolerate someone who prefers Star Wars to Star Trek, or vanilla to chocolate, or Microsoft to Apple. But when someone’s “different beliefs or morals” mean that I get treated like a 2nd-class American, that’s where (to paraphrase Jean-Luc Picard) a line must be drawn. If you can’t tell the difference, prepare to be treated like a doormat for the rest of your life.
Teban C
I can’t imagine how sad he is about the LGBT community not wanting him despite his millions and groupies.
The worst part is not what he did, but that he doesn’t want to listen to us. He’s got to deal with all the negativity he’s created. If he wants forgiveness, he has to listen to us. All of what we have to say. He needs to show humility.
Donston
Some folks spend so much of their lives in the throws of manipulation, self-resentment and/or confusions that they simply can’t engage in honest, sincere conversation and can’t genuinely listen to others. They also often don’t understand the concept of “I’m sorry”. Even after someone “comes out” their general defensive, manipulative and self-victimizing instincts can remain the same. He wants to present himself entirely as a victim who is now “free”. But you don’t get gifted that narrative after spending years voting against human rights. I’m actually doubting that he truly confronts this in a public format ever again. Yet, the articles from “gay media” will likely persist til whenever.
TheMarc
Surprise, another party boat gay defending another party boat gay. We’ve seen who Aaron Schock really is in the past several months. He’s not bouncing from one gay charity event to the next; he’s living it up. He’s not seeking permission and acceptance from the gay community so that he can work with LGBT activists to undo the damage he has done and create a more inclusive world for all of us; he’s doing it so he can be invited to parties and attend them publicly. Despite everything going on, he still lives a rather privileged existence. And as usual, is taking the path of least effort to get what he wants as it has worked out for him so far. The most damning part of his coming out is the complete lack of apology or remorse for his past actions. That alone should help you see who he truly is. F* him and everyone like him.
redzebra1
It will be hard for most people to confront him in person. I imagine if it’s an event he buys VIP tickets to hide in the exclusive area, etc. That and or perhaps always going out unshaven & wear sunglasses to conceal his identity as seems in most of his party pics I’ve seen
TheMarc
@redzebra1 – That is exactly true. But now that he’s come out; it’s “totally ok” that he’s at the White Party or whatever event palling it up with other gay celebs. It’s “totally ok” if he’s hanging out with hot, instafamous gays. All without ONE.SINGLE.OUNCE of true contrition. You’re right, he’ll keep himself locked away from your average gay; but he’s not looking for that type of interaction anyway. He came out in a veiled attempt to protect and safeguard his hot buddies who have been taking heat for hanging out with him.
redzebra1
I want to see a story on him publicly pointed out or called out! That’d be perfect! We’ll see whether he walks up and talks or slinks away through the crowd (to the exit I guess?) lol!
Verdon Coleman
I offer the following:
You know what? I am going to forgive and forget. I forgive him, because that’s what I’m called to do.
And I am going to forget him, because at the end of the day, he will be fine. He’s a white man from the Midwest. He will bounce back. He will be fine.
He won’t have to face the hatred of a society that hates him for being black, male, and openly gay. He won’t have to face the fact that he makes approximately 70 cents to a dollar that a straight white man makes. He’ll make 95 cents, if he has to take a pay cut.
He won’t have to face the fact that no matter how much he tries to assimilate, he will only be treated as a body part, desired on the down low, and STILL face discrimination when he tries to buy a house, a car, or go to a flipping bar with other gay folks and be ignored, or better yet, refused admission.
He won’t know what it feels like to face the “no blacks/fats/fems” in personal ads.
He doesn’t have to do jail time for stealing from the American people, but black men have to worry about getting unfair sentences for crimes they have proven not to have committed.
So, I have no pity for him. I have nothing at all for him. He does not exist in my world, no matter how many non-apology apologies his publicist produces.
I have forgotten him.
jaxtonypiper
Exactly.
Aaron gets to come out in a world of other pretty, white, well-off financially homobros. Aaron get to go to Rio with hunky actors.
Aaron gets to go to Cochella and give out handies to guys without having to worry about anything other than it being posted online.
OTHERS get kicked into the street in a cold, dead city.
Others get their faces bashed in for holding the hand of someone they love that society thinks is wrong.
Others DIE for their sexual identity.
But, yeah…. Aaron is the victim here.
jaa283
No…. He has to apologize first. Coming out is a great start for him, but does nothing to the community he hurt.
AshtonC
MMMMmmmm… (thinking about it) ..Yeahhhhhhh…NO! But thanks for asking! It’s been a pleasure and a privilege. .What a nice young man.
Matthew Rettenmund
With idiots like Schock and Aycox, Stonewall never would’ve happened.
TheMarc
True!!!
djhavyk
*applause* Thank you for writing this piece. Everyone’s story of coming out is different and I’m sure he handled it the very best way he could. Yes, he did some damage, but if he put all that energy into HELPING us instead of hurting, think of where he could take us! Besides, we’re better than all this petty, bitchiness.
adb12
Given that he hasn’t exhibited an ounce of remorse for his actions against the community, what makes you think he’ll start helping us now? If he does, great–I’ll support him. But right now, words are insufficient.
dhmonarch89
As for saying ‘I AM GAY’- he said that for me back in early 2012 when it was discovered he was following 17 year old Tom Daley on twitter….you could say, ‘hey, he’s a diving fan…’ but he wasn’t following American diver David Boudia who won Gold and beat Tom at the 2012 Olympics- you’d think a ‘patriotic’ American Congressman- if he loved diving, would follow the American Champion.
justmeh
Sorry, but there has been ZERO contrition, apologies, etc. from this POS, self-entitled asshole. You should know he has “always” been gay but he covered it up to further his career in politics. His despicable actions while in Congress are clearly obvious on the harm he did to the LGBTQ+ community. He has not apologized, shown any remorse, basically just thinks he can not have any accountability for his horrendous behavior and actions. So I guess we should also have welcomed Jeffrey Dahmer with open arms since he was such a creative cook? GIVE ME A BREAK. This guy is a narcissist at worst, egomaniac at best and until I see him making sincere apologies, stop being a circuit queen, start performing positive actions and good for the LGBTQ+ community, he needs to proudly wear that Scarlet Letter he so richly deserves. And for GOD’s SAKE, stop giving him more media coverage, that is what his types live for.
dhmonarch89
Had he made a REAL/GENUINE apology, you might have an argument. He’s a classic Republican- blaming others and whining, all while sending MULTIPLE dick pics and jerk off videos out on Grindr over the past year.
Joey
First of all we don’t owe him anything. And I grow heads of cabbage that are more sincere and he’s been with any of us. And I’m sure he’s being treated nicely by those that are plowing his jet setting PWR BTTM ass.
Dymension
Nah.
Kangol2
Here’s a radical idea…why doesn’t he fully apologize, and then go to hell?
armandov
I think Schock should at least use his political experience and ties to the Republican party (those that are not severed) to help improve the relationship between Republicans and the LGBT community. Despite all of his legal fees and that he has not been employed full-time since he left politics, it has been reported that he still has a significant amount of $$ in savings and now spends his time working part-time on a few projects. With all of his free time and $$, why can’t he get involved politically to support gay causes? I think that would make people stop talking negatively about him.
I do feel for him in terms of issues related to being gay and having a non-accepting family but many of us dealt with that and still didn’t throw our community under the bus. Anyway, what was disappointing is that he officially came out b/c he felt like he was forced to. I wish he had done it sooner. His forced, after-the-fact coming out makes it looks like he is ashamed to be gay.
Godabed
What fantasy world do you live in Michael Aycox, people died for the right a lot of us LGBTQIA have today, and some of our brothers/sisters are killed, put in prison, beaten every day. Aaron came from a place of privilege and according to his Instagram is taking full advantage of that and the rights he tried to deny others. So you and he can f*ck all the way off (respectfully or not) with that turn the other cheek mentality. No we have every right to be angry at his excuses and non apology. Everyone goes through hardships and family problems he’s not special and he certainly doesn’t need to be handled with kid gloves. He’s a grown man.
Grow up we live in the real world where people’s decisions have real consequences for our community.
Saps48
I said give him a break. One of the main reasons he did not come out sooner was because he feared that his parents would reject him. And guess what, they have rejected him. His troubles are not over, in many ways they have just begun.
Josh in OR
Good thing he’s a moderately attractive white guy with abs and an adult who can take care of himself, not a teenager like the many whose parents kick them out on the street every year with nothing, where his support for anti-queer legislation provided reduced protections and support systems and caused those helpless, shunned children to harm themselves or be harmed by others.
Too bad he used to be a Congressman, with no power whatsoever to do anything to help people whose families reject them over a deliberately evil misinterpretation of the Bible.
Aaron Schock is a hypocrite with nice abs and his own hair. That’s the ONLY reason anyone is even THINKING of being ‘kind’ to him. They think that by not holding him responsible for his words and actions while he was being a coward and hiding in the closet, he might someday deign to screw them.
Disgusting, pathetic and sad. That’s what ANYONE is who holds the fantasy of sex with a mediocre white boy with abs as more important than the harm that same mediocre white boy with abs did while he had the power to effect changes in his party, his constituency, his family.
Cam
IF they rejected him, then where is he getting the money to party all day? Also, many many people worried about coming out, but Aaron was the one who voted to attack the rest of us with a Constitutional amendment against our rights.
kookookachoo
I agree. Kindness is always tolerated,
ScottOnEarth
Michael, this is really great and I thank you for the reminder to get my head out of my ass and think differently. It’s too easy and basic to hate and blame, which is what the gay community is so good at. Showing love and understanding is indicative of a higher, more evolved way of being and I’m all for it. Yes, Schock messed-up but who among us hasn’t? He’s human. He’s imperfect. So am I. The gay “community” could use a lot more of this thinking and, for once, embody the spirit of the rainbow flag that supposedly welcomes everyone, even those who are imperfect. And, hey, as Cher says/sings, “there’s just not enough love in the world…..”
nunya
Gays treating each other with kindness!? Hilarious!
WillParkinson
How about we show him the same consideration he showed all other LGBT people?
scotty
how about no
Donston
When shit like this happens it highlights how many “queers” are super shallow and how many folks don’t really care about human rights and only truly give a shit about their personal comfort. It also highlights how many out here secretly contend with self-resentment/internalized homophobia. Once again, let’s not forget that this was someone who was disgraced long before he ever “came out” and is likely only “out” today because he knows he political career is over. I do think Aaron’s situation is a bit more nuanced than some are willing to admit. While people who are spending an exorbitant about of time on this dude’s social media talking shit need to get a life. You ain’t changing anything by doing that. However, trying to guilt people into “forgiving” him and trying to turn this into a story about “mean gays” shows just how much self-hatred flows in our “community”. The fact that he went the “but other people voted against gay marriage too” route just makes him even more icky and deflective. No responsibility taken at all. Never mind all the other human rights legislation he voted against. But ultimately, I don’t care about this white man. He’s not in office any longer, and no one can do anything about what he did when it was there. So, it’s best for everyone to move on no matter how you feel about him.
getoverit
It is shocking and sad just how much hate goes on in the gay community and the majority of these posts prove it. Aaron doesn’t owe anyone any apology at all and for those who feel he does well you maybe it is time you look at yourself instead.
Donston
The “mean gays” stuff is lame and deflective. It seems every time someone is publicly criticized a certain percentage of “queers” love to go the “mean gays” route. If that’s all you have to offer, if you can’t indulge nuanced conversation or try to understand people’s anger, then you’re better off not saying shit.
Cam
You said “Aaron doesn’t owe anyone any apology at all and for those who feel he does well you maybe it is time you look at yourself instead.”
—————————————————–
So he voted for an amendment to the Constitution to negate us, he voted for us to be able to legally be fired for being LGBT and he voted to strip away our rights.
But he doesn’t owe anybody an apology? Aaron, if this is you, get a better speech writer.
craigm2379
F him..figuratively !
SarcasaticMisanthrope
How about, No.
andy_d
Until he issues a REAL apology, NO WAY!
rbernard
This is not hard for our community to figure out.
Aaron Schock uniquely failed all LGBTQ people in America.
Like a lot of deeply closeted gay men born into intolerant religious families, he was afraid of himself, became homophobic, and self loathing – this happens a lot and our worst enemies are often our own kind.
No doubt Aaron’s life has been on a stressful journey.
If he wants to be out and about in our community, mostly unscathed for his antigay actions in Congress, Aaron Schock owes us all a heartfelt apology along with a big dose of contrition.
Short of that, poor unrepentant Aaron, is destine to attain the notoriety of a pariah in our community and will be fairly sneered and mocked for a long long time.
redbeardexpeditions
Finally! Thank you for putting this out there. Don’t get me wrong, I hate what he did, but I wasn’t always my authentic self either. I’m better now. Maybe he will get there one day too. We can’t really ask for love and acceptance if we don’t give it. Even when it’s hard.
moose_keating
Let’s see what he plans to do for the community to offset the damage he did to the community before extending any olive branch.
HankHarris
HIs ‘coming out’ is no doubt somehow self serving and linked to his next phase of his career. And he wants the LGBTQ community to support him. Also – and I don’t know if its true – but a political reporter tweeted that Schock was seen at the recent Trump fundraiser in Beverly HIlls…so that shows you how much he’s changed.
David
Really?… We’re STILL talking about this? Sigh.. Ok then.
As has been said before congratulations to Schock for finally coming out publicly,.. No really… I mean it. No one is in any position to judge the comming out journey of anyone else. Coming out is as much about how you feel about yourself as it is who you tell about yourself so I am glad to see AS moving in a postive direction of self – acceptance..
That being said… He HAS been treated with… well, if not compassion, defniitely with kid gloves, Welcomed into gay spaces with open arms ( and a few legs, I’m sure) Not because Schock suddenly had a gaypiphany and is now a better person… but because he looks good with his shirt off. Yes the LGBT comnunity is “outraged” at Schock’s voting record!! (all the while posing for shirtless selfies with him at circuit parties and gay clubs….) Schock is not some sort of damaged LGBT outcast in need of our love and support.
Aaron Schock has lived an incredibly privileged double life. Much of it at Taxpayer expense. His rambling Insta-sermon was dripping with self-entitlement . What is remarkable about all of this is the clear subtext by Schock, and many of those who are rallying to his “Defense” that because he is what many gay men would consider good looking, THAT is some sort of “get into gayworld free card” . As if having Abs is more relevant to being Gay than having a concience or ethics. Here’s the ugly truth that many of us don’t want to admit…. The case of Aaron Schock shows us how in many corners of our Gay World, ….apparently it is.
If Schock didn’t look like he does, he would have vanished completely from our collective public Gaydar with his resignation from congress years ago. But the sad truth is, this disgraced ex congressman from Peoria IL, who posts hot shirtless pics, STILL rates more column inches in gay online media than oh… say LGBT activists in places like places like Asia and Africa who risk their lives every day to make the world a better and safer place to be Gay,
But I get how the idea of holding Schock accountable for his actions while in office that hurt our community is very appealing. But I cant help but think the best way to do that is to simply ignore him. The Kid is just fine and doesn’t need our help.
GentlemanCaller
More of that self-destructive “when they go low we go high” aspirational nonsense. Sure, treating everyone with love and tolerance would be nice, but this guy worked hard to deprive people of love, jobs, and medical care. The fact that he likes to suck dick now is irrelevant to that, regardless of how hot be may be to some (or how much Queerty might like to feature shirtless pictures of him and not get slammed for it). These folks telling us we need to understand his pain, or celebrate his coming out, or treat him with love need to just acknowledge that they’re either conservative trolls or shallow gays who want to see his private pics.
Robert Dutton
“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”
Martin Luther King, Jr. MINISTER, CIVIL RIGHTS ACTIVIST
Gandalf The Grey
So Robert Dutton, we should all love Martin Luther King Jr.’s assassin?
rocmond
Nope. He is going to have to do better than a non-apology. Maybe sponsor and support a gay straight alliance at a high school or college. Maybe he could attempt to undo some of the damage he has done. Maybe he could volunteer at the prison he wasn’t sent to. Maybe he could DO A MILLION THINGS to show regret, remorse, retribution, reimbursement. Until then, NOPE.
Gandalf The Grey
Maybe he can join the Log Cabin republiKKKons and embezzle all their money. THAT would be doing the LGBTQI+ Community a favor!
tykin88
Oh Please! If he wasn’t “hot” and this very typically exalted, worshiped type of square jawed, 6 pack white man in the gay community, no one would be asking to show him kindness.
ta2t2o
Exactly.
dustashed
I guess it’s hard for people to show kindness and forgiveness if they never knew it themselves– if nobody has shown them.
It’s sad.. but it is what it is
I hope someday it gets better for everyone
SportGuy
Nope. He is a self hating gay and racist
ta2t2o
Here’s an idea, why don’t we stop giving shitty acting gay men a free pass because they happen to be visually appealing. If Aaron Schock was some overweight 58 yo, would you still be giving him a pass for being such an ass?
arichardsonxc
If he wasn’t attractive with abs would we so forgiving to him? I doubt it. Ohhhh poor classically attractive white boy from a good family, we just need to love him to earn his respect. No one forced him to be anti-gay. It’s one thing to struggle but he want as far as running for elected office and trying to enact LAWS. He’s also still a very active Trump supporter.
yup5hioop
Aaron should shut up and bend over for all of us. Or at least a spanking.