GOP Vampires

Hey, Mitt Romney, Edward or Jacob?

Mitt Romney made his Republican presidential aspirations official yesterday. Yawn.

But there is one burning question we have for him, more important even than boxers v. briefs. We have to ask you, gov., are you an Edward man or a Jacob man? And you, Jamie Gangel of the “Today Show,” who conducted the interview this week with the perennial presidential aspirant, how could you not ask this vital question? (The whole “Twilight” thing is over, but who knew grown Republican lawmakers were reading books for tweens?)

Does this answer the question?

The candidate gave the very casual television interview in his home, but after talking about the books, carefully added, just to make sure there was no confusion on his position: “I don’t like vampires…I don’t know any.”

That’s good to know, thought some members on the right-wing (read: all) of his own party act like vampires when his moderate views come up.

He said he thought the Twilight books were “fun” and started reading them after his children had finished. No word on how he feels about the homoerotic undercurrents of the movies.

But we have to wonder, since the vampire/werewolf series was written by fellow Mormon Stephenie Mayer, could there be some kind of spiritual affinity even if she is likely to be well to his left? And if he were to answer the Edward or Jacob question eventually, do you think that would hurt or kill his very real chance to win the nomination?

Scott Wallis is co-host of the weekly GayCities/Queerty-sponsored Swish Edition comedy & interview talk show