Residents of Gimli, Manitoba were “mortified” and “embarrassed” this week to learn that a local retailer had been selling “Gay Away” pills, a candy gag gift that both “cures gayness” and “stops the craving for misbehaving.”
The product was pulled from store shelves once a 12-year-old girl mistakenly believed the pills were authentic and wound up on the local news. The store’s owner quickly offered a public apology and claims the sale was an “honest mistake.”
Gay Away pills are manufactured by Laughrat, a Toronto-based company that offers other tasteful products like Hornitos, Extra Strength Fuckitol and Bonergizer. Some of you argued that novelty gifts don’t always have to be politically correct, calling Gay Away pills more hilarious than offensive.
Does the sentiment hold true for all questionably offensive gay gag gifts, or are these gag gifts just plain offensive?
Talking Gaydar Keychain
Is he gay? Is he straight? Can’t tell? Why not let an offensive keychain offer the definitive answer? The talking “Gaydar Keychain” has “amazing powers of detection” and offers instant results. All you have to do is aim the device at your subject, press a button, and hear an awful gay stereotype accuse your friends of being gay. (Then, you should probably punch yourself in the face.) Eight years and up.
That’s So Gay! Sound Machine
“We all wish we had our very own very gay best friend,” say the makers of the That’s So Gay! Sound Machine. Those who don’t have access to a gay can easily “add fun to any dinner party” with this machine, which takes the place of your “sassy and flamboyant” gay friend by spewing “25 of the gayest expressions ever heard.”
Grow Up to Be Gay Magnet Set
Help any “little boy” grow up to be gay with this vintage magnet set that includes pink hair tools and accessories as part of the “Hairdresser” set. Little boys that wish to grow up gay through other professions can choose from “Nurse,” “Interior Designer,” and “Figure Skater”.
“Heyyyyyyyyy! You’re gay!” T-Shirt
Nothing says it’s okay to say this! quite like an offensive slogan on a t-shirt. Insulting apparel has long been a favorite choice of men who are too cowardly to voice their opinions aloud, so they’ll absolutely love to add this fabulous “Heyyyyyyyyy! You’re gay!” top to their collection.
Inflatable Gay Best Friend
It seems like everyone wants a gay best friend these days! For those who just can’t get the full experience from the keychain above, there is still hope with the “Inflatable g*y Best Friend.” British grocery chain Tesco came under fire earlier this year for offering the inflatable dude for sale online. The item has since been pulled from shelves, but don’t worry! Amazon still has it!
Instant Gay Accent
What the hell is a gay accent, exactly? Whatever it is, you can have it instantly with this “exquisite breathmist for the discerning mouth.”
The gay bar actually looks kind of hot, until you read the product’s description:
Sometimes we are just in the mood for a gay bar. Ok, a lot of times we are in the mood for a gay bar. Now, you can have one nestled comfortably in your bag or pocket! This gay bar will have you screaming “DO YOU BELIEVE” louder than Cher ever did. Sometimes you don’t have time for the bar and if you crave hot men, fun drink recipes, advice and even more hot men then this gay bar is what you need. The bar is filled with fruits (insert joke here), nuts, seeds and loads of other natural ingredients. Hangover not included.