Monday mornings are the worst! We hate them more than we hate mysterious rashes and babies. To prove how much we hate them, we’re going to follow Idaho resident Jim “No Irony Here” Valentine’s (pictured in an artist’s rendition) example and put up a sign declaring Monday’s and their dreadful mornings are no longer welcome in our lives.
That’s what Valentine has done with his disdain for homos and pedophiles, two groups of people the charming man lumps together like so much hay (or potatoes…). In an effort to protect his state from an influx of queers, he’s erected a sign reading: “Peds queers fags your (sic) in Idaho now…” Another sign says, “Don’t fruit with Idaho kill yo-yo boy” – “yo-yo boy,” of course being his loving nickname for a convicted murderer and child-rapist.
Valentine, who drives a car with a Confederate flag an a horn that plays “Dixie,” has taken it upon himself to protect his state from the wiley, sickeningly depraved homos hell bent on taking over his waves of grain, dirt roads, and whatever else they have in Idaho.
Anyway, we think it’s just a swell idea! So, we’ve just put up a sign of our own: “Monday Mornings, Go To Idaho. And, also, suck it.”
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
(PS: Mr. Valentine, we don’t think “fruit” can be used as a verb… What’s that? You’re trying to make a play on “fuck”? Oh! Damn, you’re one clever bigot!)
Ryan
I propose we gayify states like Idaho by planning yearly trists into the reddest states as vacation hotspots. Imagine 10,000 homos converging on Boise, Idaho for a week long vacation to have lots of butt sex and peruse the local downtown shopping district? Then we can go head on over to whatever lame clubs, bars and pubs they happen to have (after all, there are almost 200,000 who live in Boise… there must be *something* there!).
It may not be my idea of the best vacation, but at least it’d be a vacation with a purpose.
Kristy
I basically live in Post Falls and I saw that in the paper and it made me sick. I almost want to go down there and slap him. He is just and old guy that probably never gets any action himself so he has to make himself feel better and get attention for belittling people who happen to have a different life style.
And as Far as I am concerned I don’t care who you are or what your sexual preference is as long as you are a good person your welcome in any part of Idaho. I can tell you I won’t be voting against Gay Marriage on Nov. 7 I am all for it and I don’t think we should ban things like that. If my children turned out to be gay I don’t wan them to think they would ever have to hide it, and banning it sends that message to them. Thats it’s wrong, and its not.
Kristy
Charlie
i am a fag and i think we rockk… its none of anyones business what me and my boyfriend do… we only do it 4 times a hour… 🙂