the famous

How Did Wanda Sykes Escape the Pressure (From You People) to Come Out?

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What do Rosie O’Donnell and Wanda Sykes have in common? Besides being funny ladies? And gay? And famous? And activists? They’re both parents.

“It is totally different … but it’s good, it’s a positive thing. Now, you want to go home,” Wanda tells Rosie of parenthood, which she says was never one of her life’s goals. But enough about that, let’s get to salaciousness!

From Matt Bomer to Clay Aiken, there’s intense pressure of Famous Gays to come out, because supposedly the more high-profile homos walking red carpets and chatting from the box means a better chance at average Americans supporting LGBT equality. (Not everyone agrees.)

So it’s interesting to hear Rosie say (around the 4:10 mark) how much pressure she felt to come out, and that it came from the gay community, particularly from former Advocate editor Judy Wieder. But Wanda says her experience was very different: She didn’t feel any demands from fellow gays to make her sexuality known.

Which is, theoretically, how it should be. But with so few out gay celebs, there remains a yearning from inside our demographic to want to see more of our kind make it. So we can play our favorite game: knocking them down.

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  • dontblamemeivotedforhillary

    What do you mean by “You People” Queerty?

  • Mark in Colorado

    Because she’s BLACK. Irony much.

    I’m MEXICAN AMERICAN. Not all of us like them and vice versa so much.

    Sad but reality.

    Mi familia nombre es Olivarez.

  • Lazycrockett

    Cause the queens couldn’t brag to their friends bout the drunken night they spent with her.


    I helped organize the Las Vegas rally where Wanda came out. It was a complete surprise and really changed my life forever. It was the first time that I had seen a famous Black person be proud of saying they were Gay. I have been an activist ever since.

    It does help for famous Gays to come out, but outing them before they are ready doesn’t seem as right to me now as it did ten years ago.

  • benlayvey

    Because she is not an A-lister like Matt Bomer of course. Some gays are just happy to get a glance from the most popular kid, a glance they read too much into. Sad really.

  • Marcus


    Bomer is an A-lister?

  • tjr101

    @benlayvey: LOL, Bomer is an A-lister for you!

  • 4 Douche BFs from my 20s (I am smarter now)

    @DEREK WASHINGTON: I don’t think anyone is pushing outing of celebrities outside of a Perez Hilton, and he’s doing it because he is a gossip monger rather than because they are gay. I think the real debate when you see it here is between those who think people should come out because of the good it can cause, and those making excuses for those who do not come out. Normally they make excuses by turning not coming out into some kind of virtuous act related to privacy or some other non sense. The reason it is non sense is because we don’t hold straight celebrities to that standard of privacy. If we did, then I would be okay with that, but that’s not really the standard for celebrity privacy and everyone knows it. But with gays, we are suppose to pretend it is.

  • 4 Douche BFs from my 20s (I am smarter now)

    @benlayvey: Bomer is not an A lister. Also, the difference between Sykes and Bomer is that she did come out. Her career, by the way, is probably bigger than his right now. She’s on the track now to being a solid B lister. He’s more like C list. A lot more people know who Wanda Sykes is than Bomer. I am sure of that.

  • benlayvey

    @tjr101: @4 Douche BFs from my 20s (I am smarter now): @4 Douche BFs from my 20s (I am smarter now): @tjr101: I was being sarcastic with my comment. Bomer is not an A-Lister for me. An A-Lister for me will be a Depp, a Jolie. But he is for a number of readers here as evidenced by the 270+ comments Queerty’s most recent post on him amassed. Most them swore–on a most militant term–his outing will validate their sexuality, at least that is my deduction when I psychoanalyzed their comments.

  • 4 Douche BFs from my 20s (I am smarter now)

    @benlayvey: Wow, you are either a liar or an idiot since totally are wrong about what was said in the comments section of that other article.

    If you can’t discuss issues without either lying or being completely wrong about the positions of others, there’s something wrong with you. The fact you keep writing about it days later only reinforces how fucking nuts you are.

    The position for those who don’t know any better that was consistently made is the importance of not treating gay a) as bad such that it needs to be hidden or b) argue that there is something virtuous in what Bomer is doing. As you can see by Ben- there are a lot of people who really are not capable of rational thought on the subject.

  • 4 Douche BFs from my 20s (I am smarter now)

    @benlayvey: I should add that the opposite point was made to what you describe here. Many who said he should come out said that he was not that big of a deal as his publicists seemed to think he is. That in fact, for many actors at his level of the game, coming out does nothing to their careers. It was the over the top posters like Ben here who kept exaggerating the issue being discussed. Just like he is doing now.

  • terrwill

    Funny thing is I don’t recall seeing a lot of speculation about Wanda prior to her coming out…………………

  • PeterK

    Ah queerty – the same old tired back and forth between the same old tired folks. I remember when queerty dealt with important issues to our community, not whether or not a star should come out and potentially damage his or her career. 50% of the 270 comments on Matt Bomer were generated by two or three queerty ‘regulars’ who obviously have too much time on their hands, trampling on other’s opinions – count them. Let’s deal with important issues.

  • 4 Douche BFs from my 20s (I am smarter now)

    @PeterK: Look, you are clearly the same person who posted the last time. Do you really think posting under a different screen name will mean anyone does not realize that the argument is so specific and so out there that it is not the same person? Really? I mean- come on. Go be nuts some place else.

  • PeterK

    5 out of 15, you’ll easily crack 50%…

  • benlayvey

    @4 Douche BFs from my 20s (I am smarter now): “you are either a liar or an idiot…”
    Good God, ad hominem rears its ugly head. I’m outta here! Nice try there buddy, I will not be drawn into a fight over such triviality. Bye.

  • 4 Douche BFs from my 20s (I am smarter now)

    @benlayvey: On top of being an idiot, you apparently don’t know what ad honinem means. Let me help you:

    “An ad hominem argument, also known as argumentum ad hominem (Latin: “argument toward the person” or “argument against the person”), is an argument which links the validity of a premise to a characteristic or belief of the person advocating the premise”

    I am not calling you an idiot because your name is Ben or who you are since I don’t know you. I am calling you an idiot because your arguments are idiotic. It is a short hand for describing who you are. That you don’t know the meaning, but decide to include a term of art you don’t know the meaning of, only confirms my initial impression.

    And if it is so trivial, why are you bringing it up days later in the comments section of an unrelated article.

  • 4 Douche BFs from my 20s (I am smarter now)

    @benlayvey: The “It” to who you are being that you make idiotic arguments.

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