There’s always a slight cringe felt ’round Queerty when the mainstream media decides to tackle sensitive gay issues. Like the murder of former WABC radio anchor George Weber, killed over the weekend by a disturbed 16-year-old knife fetishist who responded to Weber’s Craigslist sex ad. Irresponsibly obnoxious CNN anchor Rick Sanchez — who can’t get enough of the Twitter and the Facebook — and Lisa Bloom discussed the murder, and raised the disturbing but valid point: What guy cruising for sex online, let alone a guy with a journalism background, does do the most basic of background searches? Weber, who was corresponding with Katehis for a week before their meeting, never seemed to have found the kid’s MySpace page, which shows him wielding knives in multiple photos. It’s a terrible outcome, a horrific situation, but as Bloom notes, it was “terrible judgment” on Weber’s part. Does anybody deserve this? No. Are there safer ways to go about finding sex? Absolutely.
Murder
How Much Responsibility Did George Weber Have?
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Kid A
It’s true that you can’t blame a rape victim for wearing a short skirt, but on the other hand you don’t leave your front door unlocked on the principle that no one has the right to come in. I’m not sure where this case fits on that continuum.
Sean
Oh come on, this is ridiculous. You can certainly question Weber’s decision to look for rough sex on the pages of Craigslist, but for not having found the kid’s MySpace page? Hw many people do you know on Craigslist who give their real or full name as part of an online hook-up? How exactly was Weber supposed to find this page?
thisismikesother
I’m with Sean on this. Consider this example (not that I ever cruise Craigslist):
I want something right now. You have my name and the city in which I live. Considering that my name is common-ish, there’s plenty enough people in Boston that if you want something “right now,” you’re probably not going to have time to research me and find my Myspace I made in the tenth grade, that clearly represents who I am, less yet see my private Facebook profile. All you have to go on is what I give you, and that’s the risk of online cruising.
The guy is a victim through and through, and placing this much blame on him is despicable.
Rasa
One thing I find interesting (and sad and somewhat disturbing) is the way these CNN presenters are so concerned with their own “Hey! How ya doin’? Good ta see ya!” images while they’re presenting “news” and commentary on a tragic murder. Check out the smiley faces at the beginning and end of this woman’s participation in the broadcast. It’s probably emblematic of CNN programming, I guess.
Merlin
I want my Ted Turner CNN back!
cufflinks
I would also like to know the statistical probability of being killed or at least harmed by a Craig’s List hookup. It would seem that there are thousands (millions?) of CL hookups occuring every day and they don’t end in death and they don’t make the papers. The way the media is reporting it, you’d think that advertising on CL is an invitation to get stabbed by a 16-year-old. I’m thinking that you’re safer hooking up on CL than you are flying a commercial airline or driving a car. And yes, these deaths might be a little underreported but I don’t think it’s by that much.
To me, the lesson is obvious: don’t let someone you don’t know tie you up or restrain you in anyway. Especially if you’ve both been doing cocaine. Craig’s List was how they met, but what they did after they met was where things got strange and unwise.
HaplessOrphan
@Rasa: I completely agree. So creepy. Could have been a story about gas prices rising slightly, the DOW being down slightly, McDonald’s introducing a new gee-whiz breakfast sandwich, or a guy getting stabbed multiple, multiple times. It’s like what Benjamin says about life amidst the shocks of modernity; eventually we are so anesthetized that we begin to laugh at the spectacle of our own destruction.
Distingué Traces
Is “it’s abusive to give cocaine to a 16-year-old” one of the things it would be tactless to say about this case?
Rikard
Of course the victim bears ultimate and FATAL resposibility for his decisions. The important question is what kind of callous social misfit makes it their business to salt the wounds of the victims friends, family and fans?
Distingué Traces
Rikard, I think the value of this kind of discussion is in the fact that Weber’s behavior was part of a social pattern that all gay men are affected by, whether or not we participate.
Gay men buy and sell each other for fifty bucks and a snort of coke on Craigslist every day – we enable each other’s addictions, we treat each other as masturbation aids, we erode each other’s human dignity. This murder is the most recent and shocking expression of an ongoing pattern of harm.