In The Future, All Men Will Take Steroids

Steroids, so hot right now.

Our scrawny ass must have missed it, but the New York Times writes that steroids and other testosterone-building agents are becoming more mainstream.

Prescriptions for testosterone have almost tripled in the past decade, going from 1.75 million in 2002 to 4.5 million last year. (And that’s just aboveboard usage.)

“I have no doubt whatsoever that intelligent, informed use of steroids, combined with human growth hormone, will one day be so accepted that everybody will be doing it,” admitted juicer Jose Canseco told the Times. “We will be able to look good and have strong, fit bodies well into our sixties and beyond. It’s called evolution, and there’s no stopping it.”

Translation: Whether by nature or science, all gay men will look like Zeb Atlas by 2023.

Images via Rick Day, Kyle Logan

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  • Dallas David

    It’s like most other medications . . . some is ok, but too much will only make things worse than none at all.

    Follow your doctor’s advice.

    Just sayin’ . . .

  • Joe

    Testosterone prescriptions are increasing because on average males are loosing their high testosterone levels at a much earlier age and doctors are more aware of it now. Why are men loosing their testosterone? Easy, most are fat, overstressed, don’t sleep enough, eat shit, don’t exercise, etc etc etc “Manopause” isn’t a natural thing.

    Look at Art De Vaney… the man is in his 70’s with the testosterone of a 21 year old. Diet and lifestyle.

  • Marie Cohn

    The Low Testosterone ad on TV featuring that tired chunky guy promises that we do these things better: play golf, dance with women, and eradicate our animated shadows.

  • jj

    ah man, does that mean everyone is going to be bald, have man boobs, and small balls?

  • Frank

    Canseco needs to go back to high school and review his Biology courses so he can talk about Evolution….wait…maybe he did not finish high school

  • Frank

    Translation: Whether by nature or science, all gay men will look like Zeb Atlas by 2023.

    Dreadful thought…more gay clones on the streets…

  • sunonthehorizon

    @Joe: I love you for this! It’s so true! I’m unconcerned about my testosterone levels, because I realized a long time ago that it’s dependent on lifestyle choices! We all need to make healthier ones!

  • wingfield

    @Frank: Haha exactly, I love that Jose Canseco and evolution can be used in the same sentence. He’s a better example of de-evolution.

  • Muscle Fan

    Better that we look like Zeb Atlas than the emaciated, meatless, unmuscled Abercrobie clones and Klein clones gay culture currently seems to be fixated on.

  • Matt

    Everyone likes to think in extremes but it’s possible to take lower doses of steroids to help you maintain a lean fit body into into old age. I know that the vast majority of this is lifestyle (something I already have taken care of) but for many the lowering of testosterone as you age is inevitable. There’s no reason to just let this process happen and let yourself get weaker and flabbier for no reason, I’m definitely going to take some TRT to maintain healthy natural levels of testosterone, not take ridiculous destructive doses like pro BBers and idiot gym bros do. Like most other drug steroids can be used for productive purposes.

  • takakupo

    This griping back and forth about what people look like and their lifestyle choices is a bit pathetic (And stereotypical of the gay community when you think about it). Could we all stop being so vein and just accept that people want to look a certain way (and DO look a certain way) and that’s that? Thanks.

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