Dubious Honor

Introducing The Douches Of The Year: The Republican Presidential Candidates

Mitt Romney

A man for whom flip-flops are a political policy and not beachwear, Romney will do and say anything to win the nomination. (And he wonders why people don’t trust him.) Romney tripped all over himself in his rush to sign NOM’s hate pledge, despite having once supported gay marriage. He managed to embarrass himself in an exchange with a gay veteran, proving that all of Romney’s personal interaction skills reside in his hair. He supports DADT (or maybe not) and has a stiff rictus grin that comes from talking out of both sides of your mouth.

It’s looking increasingly like Romney will be the eventual nominee—for want of anyone else being viable,—so we can expect more appalling pandering and backflips in the coming year.