Hallelujah! Republican presidential hopeful Mitt Romney has resolved the gay-marriage issue that seems to be dividing the nation. (You know, between sane people and religious bigots.)
In a recent news conference, the Boston Herald reports, Romney covered a wide range of topics—including his $10,000 non-bet with Rick Perry, his ever-constant view on climate change (it’s a real thing!) and how he made his money the old-fashioned way (no, not by prying it out of the hands of widows).
He also put forth the idea that maybe there should be a constitutional amendment to create three new classes of marriage rights.
1. Old-fashioned, God-approved man/woman marriage. Reserved for heterosexuals, this would include the right to marry, divorce, remarry and repeat as necessary.
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2. Grandfathered gay marriages. Divorce is bad, even gay divorce (but not gay divorcees, hey!). So Romney would allow those gays and lesbians who were legally married in states where it was legal to remain wed. Of course as president he’d work to strike down any existing or new state marriage-equality laws, so you’d have to get in while the gettin’ was good.
3. No-marriage marriage. Any LGBTs who haven’t tied the knot by the time President Romney and his GOP cronies in Congress finish hacking up the Constitution are basically SOL. But hey, if you wanna do one of those lovey-dovey commitment ceremonies that carry no legal weight—have a ball!
Setting aside how demeaning such a state of affairs would be, does Romney thing this system would actually work? It sounds almost as ludicrous as plural marriage, you know the kind once practiced by the Morm… Oh, nevermind.
Image via Gage Skidmore
Cam
He is a bishop in a religion that continued to deny blacks full membership until around 1980. Of COURSE he’s all for a bigoted tiered system. It’s what he was raised in. Now, since he can’t discriminate against blacks anymore (Although the Mormons still try to divide their wards by race….shhhh, don’t tell anybody) now he at least has the gays to be bigoted publically against. Lucky him!
Chuck
I don’t believe Mormons who descended from bigamists should be allowed to marry. There, now is that a valid viewpoint worthy of amending the Constitution. Waiting for conservatives and evangelicals to get on board.
Phil
No, it’s not valid Chuck. You are wrong.
TMikel
Mitten is pandering to the right wingnuts and that includes the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, aka, the Mormons – named after the angel Moroni but let’s not go there, okay. The CJCLDS occasinally receives a revelation that changes it tenets – such as substituting water and bread for wine and bread during communion. This is a cult and one that tightly controls its members. Let us all pray that Mitten will NOT be the next president of the United States – what an appalling concept.
JohnAGJ
So in other words, he wants to take the situation that exists in California post-Prop 8 and extend it nationally? Yeah… I don’t think so. At least his idea hasn’t a chance in heck of being ratified, given the high threshold constitutional amendment has to meet under Article V. I’m so voting Independent next year…
Andy
But when Obama says he believes that marriage is between a man and a woman but could support civil unions (and then not do anything about it), that’s perfectly okay.