Oprah says she’s going to reveal a big “family secret” on her Monday show. No, it’s not The Secret. That’s so 2008. But generally when you throw the words “family” and “secret” together, we think it’s a big coming out story, as in: “I’ve been keeping it a secret that I’m family.” But, yeah, don’t expect her to tell the world she’s gay or anything. “I thought I’d seen it all. But this, my friends, is the miracle of all miracles,” she says in a promo. “I was given some news that literally shook me to my core. This time, I’m the one being reunited. I was keeping a family secret for months, and on Monday you’re going to hear it straight from me.” I knew it: She’s Barack Obama‘s Kenyan sister. UPDATE: Oprah revealed her big secret on Jan. 24’s show: She has a half-sister she never knew about who lives in Milwaukee. That’s not the same “half-sister” who told the National Enquirer Oprah gave birth to a baby at age 14, right? The woman, named Bunny, was given up for adoption by Oprah’s mother Vernita Lee. Of course Oprah’s unauthorized biographer Kitty Kelly knew it!
christopher di spirito
Big Mama O will reveal she’s a big, ole lesbian and her husband, I mean, her BFF, Gayle King, really is her husband or, that she’s a man.
dvlaries
Interesting timing. Doesn’t a four week sweeps period begin tomorrow night…?
jak
She’s my daughter. She’s my sister. Slap. She’s my daughter and my sister. Oh never mind.
Swell
She hangs with, and gushes over the scientology crowd so don’t hold your breath.
ewe
she has a child that Stedman and Gayles ex have been raising together?
ewe
She is pregnant with a baby that is also pregnant?
ewe
She and her hairdresser are one and the same?
Rodrigo
“she’s Barack Obama’s Kenyan sister”. Thats not funny, in fact it’s passé and it seems to have been placed there to stir the political pot… (aren’t you supposed to be neutral queerty?)
Anyway, I wonder what her big secret is! Maybe she found out she is part white..
Or maybe she found out shes genetically predisposed to be overweight so
she is not going to bother eating healthy! Who knows, but it won’t be about the
L word I’m sure 🙁
ewe
She is biracial?
ewe
She is the love child of Nelson Mandela and F.W. deKlerk?
ewe
Her and John Travolta are actually blood brother and sister united in Christ and Sciencockology?
ewe
She stubbed her big toe?
ewe
Her tits are fake?
David
She is going to announce, that she, Oprah Winfrey, is the QUEEN of LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ewe
She is a buddha?
ewe
She is turning herself into a neon billboard?
ewe
It’s all been a hoax. She is really Olivia Newton John underneat the makeup?
ewe
She is a polygamist and has been married to Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck since the late 80s?
ewe
She is a mummy in a sarcophagus?
ewe
She has been living with a tv inside her stomach all these years?
David
She is a thin gal, TRAPPED, inside the body of a fat gal.
Ted C.
She probably found out who her father is. In that recent biography of hers, it was said that she doesn’t know because family members won’t tell her.
Soupy
She will rip off the mask and reveal that she is Phil Donahue.
hephaestion
@Ted C.: I think Ted nailed it. She is gonna meet her dad for the first time.
Mac McNeill
I think she’s a “Visitor”.
Nick
It’s interesting to see people who claim to care about gay teen suicides and anti-bullying trying to bully a woman who is neither a bigot nor a bully.
She has done nothing to gay people and it’s not like you’re interested sexually so you’re only trying to demean her.
Gay people trying to belittle and demean a woman by calling her a lesbian is the ultimate and I do mean ULTIMATE hypocrisy.
You are your own worst enemy. Embarrassing.
tjr101
@Nick: I couldn’t have said it better!
lvglife365
for Christ’s sake people – Oprah is NOT gay!! Get over it!!Shame on Queerty for implying she is because the title of this story is ridiculous. It really shows the lack of class and true journalism this site has. Queerty is turning into the gay version of the Enquirer. Pathetic….
justiceontherocks
@Nick: One person on here suggested she might be a lesbian. One person said probably not. Everyone else discussed something entirely different. Why are your panties in a wad about what one poster said?
BTW – why is it “demeaning” to suggest a woman might be a lesbian? is that some lower form of woman?
kayla
Some of you people truly have the gift of wit! I laughed so loud,, I scared my roommate. I particularly enjoyed the Mandela/DeKlerk love child bit. Please carry one….You guys have given me a little bit of laughter and broken up the monotony of studying, merci beaucoup!!!
Nate
@ewe:
All of those are VERY possible lol
ewe
@Nick: I have a secret Nick. Give me some money and i will tell you on Monday.
adman
Steve Harvey is her bastard younger brother, and she is now the Queen of Comedy too. Plus, she bought buffoonery in a corporate buyout, so that makes her a monopoly. And all this right After the launch of her QUEEF network or whatever it’s called. Ah yes, the status quo continues. Is there a DL for straight people yet? I feel for those who need a place to hide, you see.
GetBalance
@Nick
I agree. When someone like Oprah has made it very clear she is not gay, and the gay community keeps bounc’in that ball off the wall, yeh it’s like enough, drop it.
There is nothing more irritating than someone calling you something you are not i.e. gay people are not born gay and it’s a choice. It sucks and she doesn’t deserve to have baseless foolish rumors shoved down her throat.
It doesn’t matter if you’re calling a gay person str8 or visa versa, when it’s untrue and you know it, it’s inappropriate and rude.
Yeh it’s very demeaning, to put it mildly. Slander would fit right in there with the act.
Jason Dancin' to the Beat
Just because she’s black doesn’t mean every black person is related to a black person. Kinda an easy tired joke for you to say she’s related to Obama.
WilliamG
@Nick: Chill, faggot 😛
divkid
she is really osama bin laden in a fat suit.
and gayle is the “cave” she likes to hide in
(up to her elbow)
divkid
it will be revealed that she and gayle, famously practitioners of necromancy, having raised the putrefying corpse of luther vandross to serve as the head of a vanguard army of flesh-eating zombies to be unleashed upon a hateful thin world…
…or that was the plan untill oprah felt a bit, well, peckish and uh y’know, DEVOURED HIM!
yep, like fried chicken she reports.
Ross
@Nick: You are so right.
I’m beginning to be ashamed of myself for even reading this pathetic rag.
It must be the nonjudgmental, mature readers who take self-satisfaction in what they believe to be clever, snarky retorts that keeps me coming back.
hh
Did she fuck Elvis?…… or Priscilla?
Cam
Probably something like her mother had a child and gave it away before she had Oprah, or her father had another child that she didn’t know about assuming.
Cam
“”UPDATE: Oprah revealed her big secret on Jan. 24’s show: She has a half-sister she never knew about who lives in Milwaukee. That’s not the same “half-sister” who told the National Enquirer Oprah gave birth to a baby at age 14, right? The woman, named Bunny, was given up for adoption by Oprah’s mother Vernita Lee. Of course Oprah’s unauthorized biographer Kitty Kelly knew it!”””
_____________________________
Bingo- new it. These types of things are so easy to predict, she should have done the reveal on Maury Povictch after a DNA test.
ron
What a trashy fucked-up family that is!
jack e jett
@ewe: And the baby already smokes crack.
GetBalance
@ron
Oh really. Maybe you might point out for us what your family has produced that could surpass the positive likes of the Oprah phenomenon. Don’t hold back now.
Red Meat
Why do people hate Oprah so much? I never actually seen her show, but I have read a lot about her and its always about her helping someone or a group of people. lol.
Avenn
Thank you Ewe, you made me day 🙂
Gary B.
Ok, now that the big news is up, I must say this is much ado about nothing? Unless you worship Oprah or are her personal friend, who the fuck cares that she has a half-sister?
CA
haha