Cue the hysteria. Men’s beards are filthier than toilet seats. At least according to a new study released by some mysterious lab in New Mexico.
Late last week, researchers decided to ruin the weekends of everyone on SCRUFF and GROWLr by testing the beards of random dudes on the street. They swabbed the men’s beards then took the samples back to their lab, where they soon discovered the majority of the beards were “riddled with poop particles.”
The study concluded that men’s face blankets are as “dirty as toilets,” housing the same kinds of germs found in feces. If that’s not bad enough, “these are the things that cause urinary tract infections,” says one of the scientists.
From his beard to your urinary tract. Lovely.
Related: Someone Sent The Antigay “Semen Latte” Pastor A Giant Bucket Of Poop. Yes, Poop.
That was the story until this week, when Nick Evershed, a reporter at the U.K. The Guardian, did some sleuthing and concluded that “the study” appears to be a crock of shit. (No pun intended.)
“As far as I can tell there was no proper study, no team of microbiologists and no poo in beards,” Evershed wrote. “The origin of the story appears to be this segment from a TV news network in New Mexico.”
He continued: “Even if this was a properly conducted scientific study with a large number of samples and published in a reputable journal, there wouldn’t necessarily be any cause for concern. Human skin is home to great diversity of microbes, and it’s not unheard of for types of bacteria normally found in the gut, such as E. coli, to be also found on the skin.”
To be clear, Evershed isn’t saying you should relax because there isn’t poop in your beard. He’s saying you should relax because there is poop all over your skin.
Have a great day!
Related: PHOTOS: Gay Scruff Through The Ages
Ron Jackson
Ugh! As if I needed another reason to dislike facial hair!
Prinny
Seriously what a pointless study.
Timothy Grover
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q0kSuZFOwFE
Ruth Dalto
Discuss
Glücklich
Meh…I’ll keep mine.
Frank Croix
Only if it’s a womb broom.
Kangol
This study is pretty sketchy, but seriously, wash your hands regularly, and please, bearded people, wash those beards and all body hair regularly too!
caffesilvia
I don’t know what people see in those vagrant Santa Claus beards. I mean, nicely groomed facial hair looks fantastic on most men. But a cloud of gross fur extending 3″ out from your chin? YUCK!
jwtraveler
Total BS. Americans are obsessed with cleanliness. There is more and more evidence that the overuse of anti-bacterial products is actually harmful to human beings by reducing beneficial organisms in the digestive tract, resulting in a sharp rise in food allergies and auto-immune disorders.
Additionally, over-prescription of antibiotics and their unnecessary use in meat production creates antibiotic-resistant bacteria which potentially endanger anyone who contracts a bacterial infection.
hyhybt
“To be clear, Evershed isn’t saying you should relax because there isn’t poop in your beard. He’s saying you should relax because there is poop all over your skin.”—No, that’s not what he’s saying either. He’s saying the *same bacteria* that live in poop also live on skin and in hair.
Masc Pride
I’ve hated the beard trend ever since one of my gym crushes grew one. He was perfect before: handsome, clean cut, nice body, effortlessly masc, etc. Now he looks homeless from the neck up. I still check out his a55 when he walks by, but his face kind of repulses me.
notevenwrong
I’m sure beards are much cleaner than women’s hair. At least a beard automatically gets washed once or twice a day when you take your showers, which cannot be said for most women’s hair. Many women don’t even wash their hair twice a week, which is just another reason I’m so glad I’m gay.
Long live beards!
jwtraveler
@Masc Pride: I’ve had a beard for my entire adult life. It’s not a trend; it’s a part of my face, and my identity. Nobody has to like it, but the insults are unnecessary.