coming clean

Jack Mackenroth lists “horrid things” he did to his ex while on crystal meth


View this post on Instagram


A post shared by Jack Mackenroth (@jackmackenroth)

Fashion designer turned adult entertainer and HIV activist Jack Mackenroth has posted a candid, heartfelt apology to his ex online. In it, he details his struggles with drug addiction, including his battles with crystal meth.

“Dear friends and fans, I am a recovering drug addict. I am admitting to actions towards @dolfdietrich & many others with 100% rigorous honesty, humility, and embarrassment but with the hope of becoming a better man in doing so,” said Mackenroth, 52, in a Tweet. He also attached a lengthy statement as an image.

His statement goes on to offer further details.

“Meth binges made me a shitty person. Taking copious amounts of Xanax to come down from drugs was what eventually took me down and almost killed me.

“I am sober today. I’m not perfect in any way but every day I am making amends to all of the people I affected and treated poorly.”

Related: Instadaddy and HIV/AIDS activist Jack Mackenroth just made a major announcement

Mackenroth goes on to say he’s not abused any drugs for 46 days.

“In the midst of my addiction I hurt many people but most of all I hurt my boyfriend (now ex-boyfriend) @dolfdietrich. The list of horrid things I did is long and disgraceful but in a tangible effort to make reparations, I am listing all of the things I did and all the untruths so he can have peace of mind and begin to repair the damage I inflicted.”

He goes on to say that whilst high on drugs, he “tormented and terrorized” fellow adult entertainer Dolf Dietrich, “and made him feel unsafe in his own apartment. I broke into his apartment when he was out of town and took many of his belongings–clothes, computer, electronics, leather gear … etc. He trusted me and I betrayed that trust.”

Mackenroth goes on to say he publicly posted things about Dietrich that were untrue in an attempt to damage his then-boyfriend’s brand. This included telling a gossip blog that his boyfriend was a “pedophile … which was 100% bullshit. It still haunts him today and I am forever remorseful about that.”

Mackenroth says he got Dietrich banned from his gym for nudity and sent compromising photos of him to the gym’s management.

“The list of horrid things I did was long and unbelievable but I need to list them to come clean, be a better man and give him a sense of well-being again.

“I jammed the lock to his apartment preventing access while his dog was inside and forced him to call an emergency locksmith.”

“I terrorized him with threats and the promise of causing him harm.”

Mackenroth details several other examples of his behavior to his ex: “The list goes on and on.”

“I am committed to rectifying anything that I can,” he says.

He ends by saying, “I can’t make excuses for anything I did. Saying ‘I was under the influence of meth and xanax’ does not relinquish me from culpability. He didn’t deserve any of the bullshit that rained down on him and I am surprised and honored he is still speaking to me. It speaks to his amazing character as a human being. I hope he can forgive me and I hope anyone who reads this can let me show you that I am a new person. Actions speak louder than words.”

Related: Gay pop singer died after falling from 13th floor balcony while on crystal meth, coroner says

Mackenroth became HIV positive aged just 19. He publicly revealed his status in 2008 while a contestant on Project Runway. Afterward, he took part in a large amount of HIV-awareness raising. In recent years, he has boosted his following further with his explicit OnlyFans content.

This isn’t the first time Mackenroth has posted a public apology to Dietrich. He did so back at the end of May, but that one didn’t go into so much detail. It said he was seeking to get himself into a rehab facility.

Dietrich re-shared Mackenroth’s statement to his own social media. On Facebook he said, “This isn’t easy for me to talk about. In fact, I’ve been keeping this a secret this entire year. I need to share. Not only to hopefully heal, but I hope sharing my story of domestic violence might help someone else out there.

“Meth and violence are beating us down in the LGBTQI community… do not add messages of hate for what he did to me; I’ve moved past that. I commend Jack for his courage in writing this and coming clean.

“It’s time to set the record straight. Many of you know this year I was robbed, terrorized, harassed and slandered. Police, courts, restraining order. I am a victim of domestic violence. Today, the man who perpetrated these acts on me made a statement. Via @jackmackenroth”

Here’s wishing Mackenroth all the best in successfully continuing his recovery, and that Dietrich can heal from the past, traumatizing few months.

If you are dealing with issues related to crystal meth use, please speak to a medical expert about getting help.