Bogan Alert!

Ja’mie King’s Glossary To Not Sounding Povo

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Earlier this week, we learned that Ja’mie King is returning to school for her last year before Uni. We are thrilled that Chris Lilley will reprise his role as the ever so bitch teenager who rules Hilford (and Summer Heights High). In order to prep for the new series, we thought it was important to review King’s glossary to not sounding povo because the last thing we would want to do is embarrass ourselves in front of her. (That would be so Bogan of us.) 

AIDS (n.): a disease caused by the virus called HIV, also a cause supported by Ja’mie in hopes to raise money for the formal.



Asian try-hard (n.): A person of Asian decent who tries too hard.

Example: “Bec, you called me, you wanted some advice on how to get a boyfriend. I was giving you advice.”

Australian of the Year (n.): An award Ja’mie was nominated for her work with Sudanese people.

Barton, Mischa (person): An actress that is often compared to Ja’mie King.

Example: “My friends say that I look like Mischa Barton in that photo.”

Bogan (n.): A poor person lacking class or general appeal of any kind.

Example: I don’t want to be in classrooms where there’s no air conditioning and asbestos in the roof and just crap desks and skanky bogans everywhere and sluts and I just wish I was with my friends and I wish I was going back to Hilford.”

Bridge (n.): A pathway that needs to be built in order for someone to cross it.



Dress-up day (n.): A day during which people dress up according to the theme determined by Ja’mie.

Example: “So on Thursday we’ll be having a dress-up day to raise important funds for AIDS in Africa.”

Emo (n.): An emotional person also considered uncool.



Fashion for AIDS (n.): A runway show presented by Ja’mie.

Example: “Hi everyone. Welcome to ‘Fashion for AIDS.'”

Formal (n.): A dance event responsible for year 11 students’ best night ever.



Foxtel (n.): A paid cable service similar to HBO not owned by poor people.

Example: “Some of you come from povo families, but that’s not your fault. Some of you, I know, don’t even have Foxtel.”

Fugly (adj.): Slang for “fucking ugly” or “fat ugly.”

Example: “So that’s why when you look around a public school, and on average, like, no offense, but people are more fugly.”

Hilford Girls Grammar School (n.): A private school that Ja’mie attends and will spend her final year at before graduating.

Hot Asian (n.): A person of Asian decent who is hot.

Example: “No offense to you because you’re ‘hot Asian.'”

Housing-commission whore (n.): A promiscuous girl who lives in government-sponsored housing.

Example: “She said that Kaitlyn was a housing-commission whore and that I needed a breast reduction.”

Lesbian (n.): A girl who likes other girls that way. They are not to be trusted.



Madeline (person): A girl who no man should be texting, especially Sebastian.

Example: “Who the fuck is she? Friends do not write two text messages in an hour saying ‘see you in English,’ ‘save me a seat.'”

MySpace (pronoun): A social networking platform made popular by Ja’mie.

Example: “I’m up to a thousand friends on MySpace, and I could always do with more.”

Pashed (v.): French kissed.

Example: “I’ve pashed like 135 guys.”

Peace (n.): Calmness or a state of international politics.

Example: “I would never go out with a guy that wasn’t into peace.”

Povo (adj.): A poor person.

Example: “Some of you come from povo families, but that’s not your fault.”

Public school bitch (n.): a disagreeable girl who attends government-sponsored schooling.



Public School Skank Society (n.): a group of slutty or less than appealing girls that attend government-sponsored schooling.

Example: “Bogan Alert! The Public School Skank Society.”

Qantas (n.): An airline that provides service to and from Australia, in particular China.



Random (adj.): Something that is not common or deemed abnormal. Also, cute.

Example: “I love your bins. They’re so random.”

Root (v.): The act of sexual intercourse.

Example: “Maybe I’ll just go and root some teacher or something and get pregnant and then you deal with that.”

Sebastian (person): A year 7 student that is hotter than the rest.

Example: “He’s so hot! I’m in love with Sebastian.”

Semi-slut (adj.): A type of promiscuous girl who is not nearly as promiscuous as a hooker.



Skin graft (n.): A medical procedure to apply skin to an infected or scarred area.

Example: “Why don’t you get a skin graft or something ’cause your skin’s so shit!”

Tahitian Princess (adj.): A dark (but not too dark) level of tan.

Example: “I had my spray tan done. I went for the ‘Tahitian Princess’ ’cause it’s a little bit darker than the other girls, but I have the face to carry it off.”

Ties (n.): A clothing accessory thought of as useless or random.

Example: “Ties are so random, don’t you reckon? What are they – just pieces of fabric? They’re so weird.”

Wurundjeri people (person): The Indigenous people of the land that Summer Heights High resides on.

Example: “And thank you to the traditional landowners of Summer Heights, the Wurundjeri people.”

[GIFs: Tumblr]