John Mayer Will Makes You Suck His Balls, Drunkard.

Boys better watch their backs – and mouths – if they plan on getting soused at a John Mayer concert.

The cringe-inducing crooner blogged out about underage drinking at a recent show, telling fans he’s got some sloppy plans for sloppy drunks.

If I happen to be walking backstage and I see any of you young men passed out drunk on a stretcher, make no mistake about it, you will come-to in front of your disappointed parents with a face full of Sharpie and the sneaking suspicion that you’ve been tea bagged by one of Time Magazine’s 100 most influential people of 2007.

We’ve got the sneaking suspicion you’d like it, Mayer.