girl please

Literally nobody is buying Miserable Melania’s fake excitement about possibly being first lady again

Former first lady Melania Trump has never been known for, well, much of anything really. The aspiring-model-turned-Christmas-witch rarely does interviews or speaks to the press. She did comment on her husband’s 2024 bid for the White House this week, however. But in typical Melania fashion, her remarks were stoic, uninspiring, and possibly plagiarized.

Related: Dr. Jill Biden continues to make Melania look like the laziest, most disinterested first lady ever

Speaking exclusively to Breitbart News, the last remaining pro-Trump publication now that Rupert Murdoch has said his conservative media empire is turning its attention toward bolstering Ron “Don’t Say Gay” DeSantis, the ex-FLOTUS said, “I support my husband’s decision to run for president of this wonderful nation. His achievements during his administration had a great effect on all of us, and he can lead us toward success and prosperity again.”

She added, “I await the day when my husband returns to lead an America that is characterized by peace, love, and security.”

Related: Madison Cawthorn posts creepy AF video professing undying loyalty to Donald Trump and… wow

Ah, yes. Peace and love. Like we saw on that dark January day when her husband incited an insurrection on the U.S. Capitol that resulted in five people dying, 138 officers being injured, and lifelong trauma inflicted on countless innocent people.

Peace and love. Like the time he yelled at that poor 11-year-old boy mowing the White House lawn.

Peace and love. Like the time he had peaceful protesters tear-gassed so he could stage a photo opp holding an upside down Bible in front of St. John’s Church in Lafayette Square.

Peace and love. Like the time he (allegedly) hurled a porcelain plate across the room, shattering it, and leaving ketchup “dripping down the wall” for Cassidy Hutchinson to clean up with a napkin.

Trump announced his third presidential run in a fact-free speech given at Mar-a-Lago on Tuesday evening, during which he made over 20 false or misleading claims (by CNN’s count).

Related: Ivanka Trump explains why she’s not joining her dad’s 2024 campaign

Melania sat quietly in the front row as her 76-year-old husband rambled on for 60 uninspiring minutes about a host of issues, ranging from Joe Biden‘s cognitive abilities to the cost of Thanksgiving turkeys, before promising to “make America great and glorious again.”

Related: Rosie O’Donnell, Mary Trump, and others react to Donald’s low energy 2024 announcement and OMG LOL

When he was finished, she joined him on stage for a quick photo opp before hurrying off, presumably to lock herself in her bedroom chambers located on the complete opposite side of the building from his.

Here’s what Twitter has to say about Melania’s canned remarks and the thought of her being FLOTUS again…

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