Guys can enjoy a physical embrace without it getting sexual. Just ask the commenters who responded to a lonely Reddit user who just wants human contact.
“I am a straight guy and I get so, so depressed and lonesome a lot of the time,” the Redditor wrote in a recent post. “I really love to cuddle, but I don’t have a girlfriend and you can’t really ask a girl [because] it seems sexual. Out of curiosity, would any of you guys ever cuddle with a straight friend?”
A sampling of comments reveals that platonic gay-straight cuddles are perfectly common:
I did once. My best friend, who is straight, and I went overnight hiking in the Smokey Mountains. It got a lot colder than we expected or prepared for. In the middle of the night, we were freezing, painfully cold, and our teeth literally chattered. So he suggested we cuddle up together and we did. We cuddled as close and tight as we could until morning. … We love each other like brothers or more, and I never felt so close to anyone, even with no sex.
My best friend is straight as well. And we’ve had that kind of moment as well. Not because it was cold just because he really wanted me to understand there was no judgment. And nothing but love and trust.
Human physical contact is not inherently sexual. Two people can hold one another for any number of reasons, ranging from basic physical needs (warmth) to emotional (grief) and countless others.
It’s sad that our society sees any physical contact between men as needing to be violent or sexual. We’re social creatures, and I think most men vastly underestimate how important platonic physical contact is to our mental and emotional health.
Another commenter, meanwhile, gave succinct advice to the straight guy looking for gay cuddles: “Be clear about what you want. Be clear about what you don’t want. And you can probably get what works for both of you.”