Madonna Wins The Super Bowl! (Yeah, The Giants Weren’t Too Shabby Either!)

All of gay America was rooted to its couch last night when Madonna took the stage at Lucas Oil Stadium. And apparently there was a football going on too.

No, we kid—we actually enjoyed the game. We can’t remember the last time it was such a nail-biter near the end. And with a cute straight guy explaining the game’s finer points, it was like having a private chaperone to an alien world.

The evening did raise a few questions that we graciously waited to raise until now:

* Did Tom Brady just have helmet hair or is he going bald—from the forehead back?

* Was it cool or totally lame of Madonna to team up with LMFAO?

*Was the game over after the Patriots’ disastrous first offensive play?

* Did Nicki Minaj drop some N-bombs and other curse words in her rap?

* Did everyone boo when the cameras showed Dave “gay marriage is an abomination” Tyree—or was that just us?

*Where was Peyton Manning to watch brother Eli?

* Was it cool or totally lame when The Voice‘s Cee-lo came out to join Madge on “Like a Prayer”?

* Why was New England Patriots’ Rob Gronkowski (at right) wearing so many clothes?

* Did M.I.A. flash the middle finger during the half-time show? (Yes, she did.)

*  didn’t Ahmad Bradshaw just drop down flat when he caught the ball instead of sort of sitting into the end zone?

* What was your favorite commercial? (We didn’t really have one.)

* Was Lady Gaga at home cutting herself?

Have an answer to any or all of these queries? Go for a Hail Mary in the comments!

Photo: NBC Sports