Maggie And Brian’s Plan To Reverse NY Marriage In Just 4 Short Years

We’ve already taken a second to enjoy the sour gripings of our anti-equality foes. And while we made sure to include the National Organization for Marriage in that rotten apple barrel, little did we know that Margaret Srivastav and Brian Brown have hatched a not-so-secret plan to undo our precious New York equality—BWA-HA-HA-HA-HAAA!!! The only problem: their plan requires four years and lots of divine intervention.

Here’s the plan as laid out on their blog:

We’re putting together a 4-year campaign strategy that will reverse same-sex marriage in New York. We’ll have many more details, and ways for you to get involved, in the days ahead but the overall plan will have three phases:

Elect pro-marriage majorities next November that will approve a marriage amendment in both the Assembly and Senate during the 2013 legislative session.

Protect pro-marriage candidates in the 2014 elections, so that the amendment can receive final legislative approval in the 2015 legislative session.

Successfully pass the ballot measure when it goes before voters in November 2015.

A 4-year process seems like a long time—and it is—but it’s achievable. In New Hampshire and Iowa, they’ve had same-sex marriage for just 2 years, but are already well on the way to reversal. The key to success is electing legislative majorities who will answer to the people of their state, and not to special interests.

It reminds us of the Underpants Gnomes’ plan from South Park

PHASE 1: Collect Underpants.
PHASE 2: ?
PHASE 3: Profit

We’ll let Laurel Ramseyer at Pam’s House Blend explain why their plan will never work (unless David Tyree’s God helps them catch the proverbial football in their helmet):

Recall that the Assembly passed the Marriage Equality Act by a vote of 80-63 and the Senate passed it by a vote of 33-29. To accomplish this mean-spirited plan, NOM would have to replace at least 18 pro-equality Assembly members and 3 pro-equality Senators (incumbents all) with anti-equality challengers, get a majority of both chambers to approve a proposed amendment, maintain the anti-equality majorities through another election, then get the majority of both chambers to vote anti-equality for a second time.

Then the question would go to the voters, who already overwhelmingly support marriage equality.

No wonder Brian Brown literally sat and cried when the Senate passed the Marriage Equality Act.

Did we mention that their little plan comes with the following plea to help raise $2 million?

Will you stand with us today? Your gift of $49, $99, or even $999 or more, will be the first step toward reclaiming New York from the special interests and backroom deals that resulted in same-sex marriage last Friday night.

That’s right! For only a thousand bucks you too can have… uhh… the sanctity of kids rotting in orphanages traditional marriage… or something.