Feeling ground down by Grindr? Perhaps you’re due for a profile refresh.
On the r/AskGayMen subreddit, one user said solicited tips for making a Grindr profile, reporting being “not great with this stuff.”
“I know what to do with pictures, but what about the actual writing part? I don’t know what would be too much or too little.”
And Reddit users have been offering Grindr tips for years now, as seen on this thread and this one.
Here are some of the top pointers from Grindr users, lightly massaged for grammar and brevity…
Be your authentic self—and keep it positive
“Just state what you’re looking for and whether you prefer to host or travel. Add any preferences—positive statements only. ‘Looking to top. Can host. I prefer smooth but am open to all types. Condoms mandatory.’”
“The single most important thing you need to do is write a profile that within two or three sentences explains what you are looking for, makes a little mention about what you have to offer, and does not under any circumstances [say] what you do not want. The first two can be hard, but just be frank with yourself and the words will come. I recommend a collection of emoji about your hobbies for a screen name. Dense information in a minimal package.”
Related: Closeted Olympic athletes on Grindr can breathe a sigh of relief
Show your confident side
“This is similar to product marketing. You need to showcase the best in you. Pictures, profile info, descriptions. Trust me, the way you market your profile is directly related to the number of guys you hook up with.”
“As long as you’re confident in what you [have] out as your display name and bio, people will come to you.”
Know your angles
“Use current photographs and try to make yourself and surroundings attractive for whom you’re into. (Looking at you dirty mirror/hard water stains bathroom guys.)”
“Bathroom mirror selfies are the worst. Get natural pics. Ask friends to take photos when you’re laughing, et cetera, and not posing. They always turn out much better and give a better all-around image.”
“Ask friends for honest feedback on your pics. Some guys choose the worst pics of themselves.”
“This isn’t a job interview. Lose the tuxedo, lose the long sleeve shirt. Overdressing in your profile picture is a death sentence for your profile because what it says is, ‘I want a long-term-relationship, I won’t just hook up, and I want lots and lots and lots of your time before we get anywhere,’ whether that’s actually true or not.”
Related: Gay man receives outpouring of support after being ignored by 6’5 top on Grindr
Take a direct approach
For bonus advice, heed what Jaik Puppyteeth wrote for “The VICE Guide to Grindr” back in 2016: “In my experience, there are two successful types of Grindr profile to craft for successful responses: a sexy, mysterious profile where you come off as a cool, mildly apathetic person who doesn’t look as desperate as you actually are in real life, or the more direct approach. The direct approach has a Tinder-esque face pic, maybe shirtless, and has social media accounts linked to it. Personally, I opt for the face pic with social media linked up, because in this modern age I feel like internet stalking is a given with online dating.”
Jaik also called out Grindr discrimination: “An important note about daily existence in society: Don’t be discriminatory! If you’re writing things like ‘no femme guys’ or ‘masc4masc’ or ‘white dudes only,’ you don’t deserve to hook up with ANYONE, and I hope you lose your phone in a taxi.”
Invader7
Here’s a clue: DON’T have a Grindr.. profile..!!
Gadfeal
Wishful thinking – Here’s a more authentic list
1. Be under 30
2. Have a fit body
3. Mention “top” in the profile
4. Have appendages above average in dimensions
jt1990
At the age of 25 I was seeing a 21 yo woman attending grad school nearby. Her gay brother referred to me as being “way too old” for her. He was 23. I asked him why do all gay men think anyone over 14 is “too old”. Never heard from his sister again!
Doug
LOL, I was just going to post the same thing!!
SamB
JT1990: I14? 18? What gay men do you hang out with?
jcool
samb
i think jt was employing something i like to call sarcasm. it’s a type of humor.
jt1990
SamB probably your kind. Now be cool, Cam is lurking on here somewhere…so far he thinks we’re the same person
jt1990
Jcool glad you understand my twisted humor! SamB nor my ex seems to get it
jt1990
If you’re over the age of 18 you likely wont get much action on the gay dating sites. Most gays I’ve met are much like the perverted old straight men you see in bars: the younger the better!
storm45701
Hmmmm… not my experience. Perhaps get your mind out of the gutter? I can’t tell if you’re trolling, or just being an a-hole.
DK
How to be successful on Grindr (in America):
Be white
Be under 45
Have low body fat
You’re welcome
radiooutmike
You could delete ‘on Grindr’ and de-parenthesize ‘in America’ for a more general statement.
Joshua333
Honestly, I dont take Grindr seriously. I make too many jokes, all the time, and sometimes I land dates other times people just think I’m weird.
ggore
Honestly, there are so many bots operating on Grindr nowadays that even being on the app is pretty much useless. They are easy to spot, though, some “person” with an unbelievably attractive picture messages with the same first line, and if you respond I guarantee within the next 3-4 messages will start asking for your email address, location, phone number, and other “pertinent” information. My strategy is to write one message in gibberish and see what happens. If you get a response like “Oh that’s hot, where are you located?” then for sure you are talking to a bot. DELETE!
Heywood Jablowme
Agree about the bathroom mirror photos! If you do that, you might as well add a line saying “Even though I’m only __ years old I’m too dumb to figure out how to use my phone.” At the very least, you can flip the photo view around to take an arm’s-length headshot, or simply prop the phone against your laptop screen or something. Or as suggested, ask a friend (if you have one, lol) to take the picture.
(One old guy’s opinion. Also, stay off my lawn! Also, who takes advice from someone named Jaik Puppyteeth?)
Seth
“I recommend a collection of emoji about your hobbies…” might be the biggest boner killer of a sentence I’ve come across.
1898
i mean it’s kind of a moot point because guys on grindr don’t read the bio, they just hit the tap button or the chat button… as evidenced by the fact that they’re always asking me “what r u looking for” and “can u host” even though the answers to those questions are in my bio