BATTING OF THE BULGE

WATCH: Is This Ad Selling Mascara Or Giant D-List Celebrity Dick? Answer: Both

When they’re not trying to shove naked men down our throats, advertisers are trying to shove — nevermind, we won’t even finish that thought. But the latest ad from Benefit Cosmetics makes the Zesty guy look tastefully done.

Featuring notorious ex-porn star turned multi-hyphenate entertainer Simon Rex, the Jersey Shore‘s most adorable guido Vinnie Guadagnino — adorably teaching yoga — and some other dudes we wouldn’t throw out of bed, this delicious piece of trash ad isn’t afraid to beat us over the head — and about the face — with phallic imagery all for the sake of selling cosmetics.

We guess it’s nice that men are finally being objectified as much as women and women are finally being portrayed as wanton cocksluts. The sexist shoe, it seems, is on the other foot and that’s what we call progress. Thanks, Sex and the City!

h/t: Jezebel