At age 90, Kenneth Felts chose a way to celebrate pride month that few of his peers probably could imagine: he came out of the closet publicly to his wide circle of family and friends.
A former counselor and supervisor for his state of Colorado, Felts says he’s known he was gay since he was 12. He decided to finally go public while trying to write his memoirs during the COVID-19 pandemic. He began to relive a romance he had in the 1950s with a man named Philip, whom he identifies as his one true love. Wrestling with the memory finally pushed him to go public.
“Coming out in the ’50s, ’60s and ’70s was horrendous,” Felts tells The Denver Post. “That was part of the reason I didn’t ever consider coming out (before). There was no gay community, there really weren’t gay organizations or anything. People who came out, came out on their own, without support. And I guess I didn’t have the courage to face society at that time, so I just went ahead and buried it.”
Ultimately, Felts split from Philip, and the two lost track of one another. Felts would go on to marry a woman, have a child and divorce. Apropos of nothing, Felts’ only child, a daughter, Rebecca, came out as a lesbian herself in college. Naturally then, Kenneth came out to her first.
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“I’ve been in the closet all my life — deep in the closet, behind rows and rows of clothing. I’m way back there,” Felts says. “Opening that door at the front, I had great trepidation as to what people would say. I was very concerned because I needed people and I couldn’t stand the thought of losing them just because I decided to finally be who I really was.”
Rebecca and her wife, Tracie Mays, both embraced Kenneth’s coming out with open arms. They also encouraged him to take part in the LGBTQ community. Felts didn’t hesitate.
“He just really seemed to take it and run with it,” Mayes says. “He seems to be making up for lost time and really is owning it, which is fantastic.”
These days Felts dons his pride flag hoodie and attends senior coffee group meetings. He also raises money for the LGBTQ community through charity events, like an upcoming 5K. Beyond that, he loves spending time with Rebecca, Tracie, and his two grandchildren.
Above all, Felts has one message: live out, proud, and without fear.
“Don’t underestimate your friends and family,” he urges. “You might be surprised at how they react if you were to decide to come out. Enjoy what you’ve got while you’ve got it because you’ve only got it once.”
jayceecook
Wow. That is something. Good for him. Would have been a shame if he had gone his entire existence not knowing what a day of publicly living your truth felt like.
Side note, “Apropos of nothing”, I’m not certain that’s how that phrase should be used. I think his only child being a lesbian has a significant bearing on this story and this man’s own journey. Sure most people’s sexuality has no “rhyme or reason”. However, depending on how you view the world and it’s designs one might find a sort of cosmic purpose to it.
SELA Rising
How tremendously sad.
Chrisk
If you were born then it sure wasn’t easy. The only info you had was how sick you were. A society pretty much ruled by the religious nutcases we see today but thankfully on the fringe and getting fewer and fewer.
Today he seems to be happy and he has his family though. He could’ve ended up all alone and forgotten. Something that happens to allot of gay elders.
Toofie
Good for him!
Kangol2
Though part of his story is sad, his coming out is a joyful act. Sending Mr. Felts congrats and warm wishes, and how great that he has a married lesbian daughter who he was able to come out to as well.
fur_hunter
Better late than never……..but it is very sad that he missed out on a possible meaningful gay relationship.
Dashing Partycrasher
Every coming out is special and brave, no matter how old someone is. But this story is especially touching, because he chose to pretend to be straight even to his gay daughter — and then then he chose to turn the pandemic into something positive, by writing about his life and his truer self, and then really stepping into his truer self.
Now that he’s found a newfound sense of self and purpose in his daily life, I bet he’ll live another 10 — even 20 years! Loving ourselves for who we are, and surrounding ourselves with people who love us for who we are, are important keys to longer, happier lives.
Consider This
He’s out – now let the clubbing begin! 😉
radiooutmike
I am so happy for him!
I feel a real kindred spirit with him because I only came out at age 47. So I understand a bit of what he went through.