The latest video from web comedian Michael Henry tackles a recurring conversation in the gay community: racism on dating apps. In particular, Henry and his co-stars discuss those who post exclusionary messages on their profiles. These can include statements such as ‘No Latinos’ or ‘No blacks’.
In the video, Henry meets up with three friends. They all sit a social distance apart from one another. One of them, played by Clint Keller, is typing to a dude on a dating app.
He shows his friends the guy’s profile and it’s met with approving comments… until one of them notices that it states ‘No Asians’ under the ‘Looking for’ heading.
“That’s not OK,” says one of the friends, played by Logan Jennings.
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“Why? I’m sure he just doesn’t want to waste anyone’s time,” replies Clint.
Related: Grindr ditching the ethnicity filter has created new problems for the very people it aimed to help
His three friends then inform him exactly why it’s an offensive thing to put on a profile, how it impacts those reading it, and why it’s racist to believe there are ethnic groups one could never find attractive. They also touch upon those who fetishize some racist groups, or who put “XYZ to the front of the line,” on their profiles.
Apps such as Grindr have made efforts to try and eliminate racism and other forms of discrimination on their platforms. This has included introducing initiatives such as ‘Kindr’ to try and educate users on how exclusionary statements can harm others.
Last year, an Australian study found that people of color routinely experience discrimination on apps, and it can often impact their mental health.
“Experiencing race-based sexual discrimination in dating is associated with detriments to psychological well-being much in the same way experiencing general forms of racial discrimination is,” concluded the study’s author.
Related: Sexual racism on queer dating apps screws with your mental health
ThinkPlease
Truth be told, he used to be funny. Now he’s too often preachy.
Since we’ve found the filters have been used pretty much equally in both directions–and I’m fine with that–I’m fine with “no whites” on a profile as well. It’s great to know that everybody’s equally racist and equally hypocritical about it while they whine about everybody else.
Cam
You’re trying to parse words, but the tone of your comment seems to be….
You don’t like him for pointing this out, and you’re fine with racial prejudice.
ThinkPlease
@Cam: Don’t read in. I’m fine with racial preference when it comes to hookup apps since we found out most black folks just don’t like seeing white folks in their lists and are complete hypocrites about it, even to the point of the article writer specifically whining about not calling it “reverse discrimination.” I found that extra spicy amusing. Trust me, I don’t. I call it flat-out bigotry.
But I also don’t care if they do, it’s a free app and they’re free to do so.
As far as him pointing it out, he’s a comedian, and frankly, he does “woke” with a very heavy and very bad hand. So no, I find his videos on these things to be terrible efforts that are, frankly, a waste that…well, I can’t imagine anybody really liking or appreciating. The dialogue literally sets things up as a perfect strawman for Our Hero to knock down without any allowance for anybody to have any discussion or opinion of their own. The discussion is stilted and the acting is just…not great.
It lacks the flow that shows in his comedy, although even that’s a little strained at times and still needs some polish.
Now if you’d like me to critique your comment, I found that to be plebian and poorly thought-out, with sophomoric content and barely-considered social implications. Should we continue?
Hdtex
ThinkPlease <<<Literally racist human garbage
ThinkPlease
Hdtex <<Literally too dumb to counterargue, so why should I bother to listen? You just showed a preference for anybody who mindlessly agrees with you, which would also make you bigoted human garbage. Remember to place that in your preference, "IQ under 50, must agree with everything I say. Basically, be a carbon copy of me."
Joshua333
ThinkPlease Just because ‘you’re okay with it’ does not automatically mean it is right. To outright refuse certain groups of people just because its a ‘preference’ makes it obvious that it is not just a ‘preference.’ Clearly there are subconscious racist intentions instead of this ‘preference.’
ThinkPlease
Joshua333: Whut? My point exactly. The previous article specifically stated the filter was often used by black searchers to remove white folks. Which we specifically weren’t supposed to call “reverse discrimination” because the article writer was opposed to that. Now this video posts it as horrible when a white person does it.
So either it is or it isn’t awful if the flavor of the day is chocolate or vanilla. Personally, I don’t care. Be a bigot if you want and that’s your choice. Give ’em the filter to get rid of a person by declared race. If one doesn’t like it, don’t declare a race.
Or better still, give others the option to remove people who filter people by race. Easy-peasy.
I’m not saying it’s subconscious. I’ve been quite clear repeatedly about that above. Black and white people are both choosing to exclude the other.
But one big turn-off is the “woke” victim “my way or the highway” attitude that refuses to read and understand what’s being said and repeats itself incessantly to hear itself talk. Can I get a filter for that crap?
Godabed
As the video says “that’s racist”. People of every color can feed into white supremacy.
There is no such thing as sexual preference that excludes. That’s not the definition of “preference”. Its very clear the people who use this as a excuse never looked up the definition. The word you’re looking for is sexual “discrimination”, not preference. So if people want to be a bigot than be a bigot. Own it. But don’t be mad when people call you a racist.
Chrisk
What if a women hits on you and you state you’re not into women. Men only. Does that make you a misogynist? I mean if were going this way now..
ThinkPlease
Technically, according to this video, you’d be punching down, so you can’t do that on a dating site. No, you can’t do that and have to entertain women and simply block, ignore, or ghost them later.
Frankly, I would find being blocked, ignored, or ghosted far more obnoxious than, “No white men, please,” or “No men, please.”
My response? “No problem.” No, you haven’t raped me with your preferences. You’ve told me what your orientation and preferences are and I know to look elsewhere.
There are plenty of thin, (extremely) hairy, white, Hispanic, and Turkish men in the sea for me.
Dymension
I hear ya. It’s already been suggested that gay men are misogynists because we “don’t like women.”
ThinkPlease
Dymension: Just call ’em manhaters in return and watch the steam, then just spit “hypocrite” when they start screaming at you.
It’s fun to wind them up and walk away without a care in the world, knowing there’s not a damn thing they can do if you won’t engage with them. And they’re sure not with your time if they spew that crap.
Godabed
These two things have nothing to do with each other. Gay men can and have been misogynistic. While appropriating femininity. Which at the same time this deals directly with internalized homophobia.
Misogyny has nothing to do with sexuality. But gender identity and expression. Your argument is beyond idiotic. These types of deflection are astounding.
Josh447
The ideology in this vid might make sense if 95% of white guys won’t have sex with 95% of white guys. Is that racism too? No, it’s called discernment.
Everyone is selective when it comes to sex, but could care less about who they serve at a diner. I don’t want people to feel hurt so I get the idea of leaving out potentially offensive details in one’s profile, but putting in what one does like and want is cool. Just do it with tact. Also, every race has its hotties. The ones cruising online just may not fit that category.
Also blocking a hottie bc their profile states what they don’t want is cancel culture that needs a serious look at. It’s a lose lose. Go fck the hottie then talk about preference in online profiles. Is it that hard to be engaging instead of queening out by shutting down? This video sends some bad messages and leaves out some good ones. But then, cancel culture is the pop icon of the day. It’s: give no one a chance to engage in useful conversation, just slam the door. Bad bad bad. This vid could really be reshot to be more helpful. On many levels.
Alex_S
Just ban hook up apps already to make moralist and CC followers happy.
Me2
Some “preferences” are better left unsaid. If I’m not into someone, I’m just not responding or I’ll let them know that we’re not a match & vice versa. But as I see it, there’s no need to list a bunch of requirements and dislikes.
jackscott
Stop being so PC! People will always have preferences… tall/short, muscle/bear/twink/otter, old/young, and yes, racial. That doesn’t make someone a racist… stop the foolishness!
ThinkPlease
Now, now, you can’t have that. In fact, the next time you go to the store, you’re just going to get your ice cream flavor chosen randomly. And the next Grindr login, you’ll get sent a random man and you will sleep with him whether you like it or not.
We might even send you a woman because anything else would be blatant discrimination, after all. Erectile dysfunction is not an excuse. Use it or we also send them with a knife and a writ from Lorena Bobbit.
Wicked Dickie
I just want to know why 2 guys are wearing light jackets, one guy is wearing a tank top and shorts, and the other is wearing a woman’s cut shirt?